Hello NoFap, thanks for having me!

Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by definitelySerious, Apr 3, 2015.

  1. definitelySerious

    definitelySerious Fapstronaut

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    Hello NoFap.

    Far from being alone in my struggles, after reading account after account on YBOP, NoFap and RebootNation, I realise that this epidemic is huge. The amount of men and women going through the same pain, the same struggles, the same fight, depression and despondency is not trivial. While I always knew the majority of men (and increasingly women) use pornography, the solitary nature of the struggle is something we desperately hide and shy away from.

    To those who have shared their journey - my absolute gratitude and thanks. Your stories are the one thing that can counter the dopamine snap and fall from grace that stares at me from billboards, magazines, tv, movies, internet and women walking the streets. Reading someone else’s successful journey about freedom from PMO and twisted sexuality reminds me that hundreds have trodden this path, and above all that one can be free.

    I have fought this battle for as long as I have practiced PMO, and have been brutally honest with myself, friends, mentors and wife about the struggle, but the honesty has always been met with awkward silence or worse, trite advice. The longest streak I have managed before relapse in the past was over 100 days.

    One of the most disheartening thought patterns over my 20 years of struggling with PMO was that there was no hope, that I’d never be able to beat the addiction, that I’d be forever falling and out of control, that it was completely up to me - but in community and honesty there is an immense power. This community is a blessing to many, and I hope to contribute in the same way to help others.

    This is my journal: Fear and Loathing in Manhood

    For the record, I'm over 40 days PMO free and nearly a week into hardmode. The hardmode target is 90 days, and my wife is supportive of this. The reason going hardmode is important for me is because my perception of God, sexuality, self worth, self esteem, true intimacy and living unselfishly has been so warped by PMO and our cultural view of sexuality, that I believe total abstinence is necessary to truly reset. I've had too many experiences in the past where I've become complacent and fallen back into bad habits after a good run of being PMO free. I've done a serious amount of thinking about PMO and sexuality over the years, and I'm keen to share thoughts with you all. Please get in touch.

    Stu
     
  2. change9412

    change9412 Fapstronaut

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    Welcome Stu,

    I can relate to your post, I think most people who are reading this, will be able to relate.
    Since you're 40 days PMO free, i'm going to keep this short, you know what you're doing :D

    However some of my tips (if you're not doing this already):
    - keep yourself busy! Excercise, listen to music, meditate, pray, ..
    - start a daily journal for yourself (on here), to share what you're expierencing (Which you're already doing, bravo!)

    If you feel temped, visit: http://emergency.nofap.com/ (BOOKMARK IT)
    Install this porn blocker: http://www1.k9webprotection.com/ (Ask your wife to set the password, which you can't guess, or know. This works great!)

    Good luck man, keep us updated!
     
  3. Welcome. I am Jim and you are coming to a good place. I invite you to check out my journal and get to know me a bit. I've found this to be a great place of support and encouragement. The folks on here have become real friends who help me with issues of PMO and other struggles in my journey.

    I suggest you find a friend or two to have as accountability partners. Journal in your journal regularly. Find positive activities...exercise, music, prayer, etc., to replace the bad stuff you are giving up.

    Find a couple of journals to read regularly. Seventyniner and Old Growth are good ones to begin with.

    Again, welcome. You are taking a good step in the right direction.

    Jim
     
  4. definitelySerious

    definitelySerious Fapstronaut

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    Thanks @change9412 - appreciate your advice. Will certainly keep you updated!
    Hello @Jim2015, I'll certainly check out your journal and get to know your story. The honesty of the community is profound, and I hope to get to know other people struggling on this journey. Thanks for your welcome, encouragement and advice - please feel free to follow my journal thread, as I'll be updating it regularly.

    Stu
     
    Jim2015 likes this.

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