Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by jonfisher, May 22, 2019.

  1. jonfisher

    jonfisher Fapstronaut

    This is my first time posting here, although NoFap has been on my radar for some time.

    I'm 26 and have had a PMO habit for countless years (maybe as many as ~15). I have been trying to quit vaguely for the past year or so, and seriously for the past 3-4 months.

    Why do I want to quit? I recognize pornography and masturbation as a true addiction for me, motivated by the same thought patterns and brain circuits that have powered alcoholism and drug abuse for me in the past. At its core, I think it's a (subconscious) self-soothing mechanism -- an attempt for me to avoid pain, stress, boredom, and to seek validation (that might not sound legit, but it comes in the form of imagining that I too could be like those people I see on the screen). Entertaining this -- allowing it to control hours of my weeks at a time -- is self-destructive, self-harmful, and harmful to others in many ways (e.g., harming my relationships with others, funding the pornography industry). Coming to this has been a spiritual and intellectual journey for me.

    One book I recommend is "In The Realm of Hungry Ghosts" by Gabor Maté. Although it's largely about drug addiction, it really hits home for me in showing addiction for what it is and speaking to how we can understand and tackle it empathetically.

    I hope that participating in this community will be productive for myself and for others, and provide a compassionate source of accountability. Looking forward to launching my reboot log tonight, and learning more about many of you!

  2. eitaporra

    eitaporra Fapstronaut

    Welcome and good luck!
    jonfisher likes this.
  3. jonfisher

    jonfisher Fapstronaut

    Thank you and same to you!
  4. Always be positive

    Always be positive Fapstronaut

  5. jonfisher

    jonfisher Fapstronaut

    Thanks for sharing, @Always be positive, I will consider this.

    It definitely makes sense to me that introducing positive habits (e.g., your collection of 7) will help. I personally would at least like to commit to exercising every day, and meditation/prayer for at least 10-15 minutes a day.
  6. bfdet

    bfdet Fapstronaut


    If you haven't already done so, please read the "Getting Started Guide" available on this site's home page. It includes a lot of information that you will find helpful as you start your journey of healing. Also have a look at the "Glossary" on the top of this page for definitions of abbreviations and terms that may be new to you.

    One day at a time is how we all succeed.

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