Help me, its an urgency.

[hope33]

Hello reader!
As you already know that I am new here, I will just briefly introduce myself and my elucidate my problem!
i will try to keep this short so as to not waste much of your time, so please stick to this thread, and help me out!

I am a male, a college student (apart from exam schedules, i get a lot of free time throughout the year), and I am 21 years old.
Like any other teen, in my society, I started watching porn. Well, that was normal back then. I was an introvert guy, and lacked a close friend circle. And, haven't touched a girl sexually till now!
Nearly 3 years ago, I learnt of a term called joi (or, jerk off instructions/encouragement). I enjoyed that, and I can tell, that was normal too. BUT, now, its been more than a year, and am masturbating with trance/hypnosis dominance videos. (As creepy as it might sound, there's actually a dominant woman conditioning and controlling). And, here i am addicted to this one. I masturbated this evening, and I can't take it any longer. You know, that offence, humilliation that comes after an unwanted jerk off sessions: thats at its highest here!

I have been watching and listening to videos and audios, of this particular woman so much that, I am addicted to her.
Today: that was a streak of more than 10 days of NoFap. I had even planned a workout schedule to use this energy building myself, but this extreme urge to view didn't suffice, so I fell down again!

I feel, am at the brink of destruction and I strongly need a fatherly figure, guiding me, helping me snap out of this fetish.

Please, someone ...!

 

[truthseeker17]

falling down and standing up. This is how it goes. You can't win without losing.

I feel your frustration but right now it's not the time to be mad at yourself. You are feeling bad and guilty about it. It means that you are still a good person. Stand up and start again with even more determination to stop it.

Remember it's not always about how much you can give.. how much can you take?

Learn from your mistakes and keep going, pushing and prograssing.

 

[Crash95]

So welcome to this community. It`s completely normal that due to exceeding use of porn websites your brain needs more and more stimulation to get excited. It`s basically like a drug. So it`s nothing bad about a fetish except you don`t want to have it like you described. So you did the first step already by registering here and trying to stop using porn. It will be very challenging but you can do it! If you keep fighting your dreams will come true too, like getting more self assurance and meeting real girls, etc.

You even got a streak of ten days without it, so why don`t try to get 11 next time and then 12? Little steps will bring your to your goals as well. Be proud of yourself what you reached already and go on!