Help me! Need advices!

blunt.ever

blunt.ever

Fapstronaut
Hi, I'm 19 and I'm a virgin. Over 2 weeks I will have to have sex with a girl, but I do not feel ready. I cannot refuse it because I have refused it twice. Although we are not together, this girl wants very much to do it. She has a lot of experience, I told her I don't have, but she said it's no problem. She does a lot of nice things for me, she helps me with everything, she is always present for me, and I do not behave very nice to her. But I promised her that in 2 weeks we will do it. Now I want many tips on how to get rid of stress because I am extremely stressed, you have no idea. And how could I increase my libido, testosterone. Do not come with advice, if you do not feel ready, tell him to wait. How could I please? What foods to eat, what to do in my spare time? I suspect that staying at home on a laptop is not a good idea. Are city trips ok? I really ask you to come up with as many tips as possible, what can I do in these 2 weeks to get rid of stress and have more desire.
 
You seem very rushed dude, don't be. It doesn't matter what you do. Just be natural as you would be in any other occasions. Go to bed early, read something before sleep. Drink a lot of milk cause it's a nice anti stresser. Also you can go to city at night for a walk just to think. Only you and your thoughts. Good luck.
 
@blunt.ever when I was 18 I started dating an overtly sexual girl as well. I was also a virgin. I was afraid of sex, deathly afraid of sex. I was taught that sex before marriage was a sin, in addition I had a brother who contracted HIV and was just diagnosed with full blown AIDS (this was back in the early 90s). This girl really wanted to have sex with me, but I refused. I ended up breaking it off with her because of my fear of sex. I repeated the same pattern with 3 other girls, until I met my first wife. To say my first wife was non-sexual would be an understatement. In the 14 years we were together I can literally count on one hand (no pun ) how many times we successfully had intercourse. At first this was a relief, I could have a girlfriend and not have to worry about sex! But after several years of dating and marriage I realized the error in my logic. Sex is something we are wired for, it should be something fun, wonderful and joyous shared between two people.

Dont let your fear get in the way of enjoying life. Will Smith said "some of the greatest things lie on the other side of fear". If you dont feel she is right then by no means allow yourself to be pressured into sex. However if you are even a little attracted to her, and she to you, then let it happen. It doesn't need to be magical, and its surely nothing to freak out about. Just dont let your fear dictate your life. That takes you to dark and lonely places.
 
Browns4life said:
@blunt.ever when I was 18 I started dating an overtly sexual girl as well. I was also a virgin. I was afraid of sex, deathly afraid of sex. I was taught that sex before marriage was a sin, in addition I had a brother who contracted HIV and was just diagnosed with full blown AIDS (this was back in the early 90s). This girl really wanted to have sex with me, but I refused. I ended up breaking it off with her because of my fear of sex. I repeated the same pattern with 3 other girls, until I met my first wife. To say my first wife was non-sexual would be an understatement. In the 14 years we were together I can literally count on one hand (no pun ) how many times we successfully had intercourse. At first this was a relief, I could have a girlfriend and not have to worry about sex! But after several years of dating and marriage I realized the error in my logic. Sex is something we are wired for, it should be something fun, wonderful and joyous shared between two people.

Dont let your fear get in the way of enjoying life. Will Smith said "some of the greatest things lie on the other side of fear". If you dont feel she is right then by no means allow yourself to be pressured into sex. However if you are even a little attracted to her, and she to you, then let it happen. It doesn't need to be magical, and its surely nothing to freak out about. Just dont let your fear dictate your life. That takes you to dark and lonely places.
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I know, sex should be something relaxing between 2 people, something as natural, no matter how you do it, it matters to feel good with that person. But the media, the internet, porn have changed our mindset that you should be good at having sex, otherwise if we fail we will feel guilty. That's what I've been trying to figure out for a long time, because I started looking at sex as something we do just to be like others, not for ourselves.
 
blunt.ever said:
I know, sex should be something relaxing between 2 people, something as natural, no matter how you do it, it matters to feel good with that person. But the media, the internet, porn have changed our mindset that you should be good at having sex, otherwise if we fail we will feel guilty. That's what I've been trying to figure out for a long time, because I started looking at sex as something we do just to be like others, not for ourselves.
Click to expand...
I hate this "media".
 
blunt.ever said:
Hi, I'm 19 and I'm a virgin. Over 2 weeks I will have to have sex with a girl, but I do not feel ready. I cannot refuse it because I have refused it twice. Although we are not together, this girl wants very much to do it. She has a lot of experience, I told her I don't have, but she said it's no problem. She does a lot of nice things for me, she helps me with everything, she is always present for me, and I do not behave very nice to her. But I promised her that in 2 weeks we will do it. Now I want many tips on how to get rid of stress because I am extremely stressed, you have no idea. And how could I increase my libido, testosterone. Do not come with advice, if you do not feel ready, tell him to wait. How could I please? What foods to eat, what to do in my spare time? I suspect that staying at home on a laptop is not a good idea. Are city trips ok? I really ask you to come up with as many tips as possible, what can I do in these 2 weeks to get rid of stress and have more desire.
Click to expand...
Relax friend, if you have sex anxious and stressed how you are now, it's probably that you'll have premature ejaculation or even have a erection (ED).
 
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