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Help with dating, in concept.

Discussion in 'Dating during a Reboot' started by BillyC, Jan 1, 2018.

  1. BillyC

    BillyC Fapstronaut

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    Hi all,

    I might be naïve and alone in this, but I am sure there might be some others who have similar problems or issues. I am currently on the fence about whether to start dating or not, being a senior in high school, and next year attending a university, so advice on both fronts would be welcome.


    I have always held the belief that, because high school relationships tend not to last long after college, high school dating was, therefore, pointless, and thus something to be refrained from.

    However, in my quest of being a reasonable man, I realized I could not dismiss what I did not know; I did not know what exactly dating was or how it worked. That is, I knew that the purpose of dating is eventually marriage, but other than that, I knew nought. to put this in perspective, if I were to ask a girl out, I am less afraid of rejection than her agreeing to go out with me, as I have absolutely no idea what to do from there. This is because I just do not know how to date someone.


    Therefore, please help me out by explaining or giving examples of how to date/go out with someone.

    Again, there might be some obvious thing I am somehow missing, but I believe that I might not be alone in this.
     
  2. The Wrestler

    The Wrestler Fapstronaut

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    A belief I, too, held.
    Ultimately yes...kind of. See, there are two wrenches in that idea. First is that healthy married couples still date. If marriage is the end goal, why do they continue dating?
    Second is, yes, marriage is the end goal (sort of), but how are you going to know if you don't date, and how are you going to be good, or even adequate, at dating if you don't practice?

    When I was a senior, I had a girl tell me she liked me. Because I thought it was all for nought in six months when I would leave for uni, I decided to take the relationship out back and shoot it. What do you think of my actions? Who was I to decide the future? And even if that relationship did die at the end of the summer, would I have not gained valuable insight into dating and relationships and, indeed, myself?

    It was not until a few years ago that I started dabbling in dating, with what I consider to be a healthy attitude: dating is practice. This attitude shows that dating is something to be learned and something you are capable of learning, plus it has the added benefit of taking the stress off. Bad date? It's practice. Reconciled? Practice! I still see dating my current girlfriend, one who may well become something more in the coming year, as practice. I get to learn new things about her every day.
    If you're going to practice, you can jump to the one-on-one, but you can also ease your way in with group dates if that's a bit daunting. Set up a thing for you and a group of your friends, male and female - roller rink, Catan, mocktail party (no, that's not a spelling error)...there are lots of great options.
     
  3. ..Anna..

    ..Anna.. Fapstronaut

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    It is really rare that people with whom you date first will end up in marriage no matter the age. So, yeah, practice and enjoy, even if it will end up in a weeks, it will always learn you something. Also dating helps you find out what you don't want in a partner, what you wouldn't know before facing it, thus be better in choices and sorting out women later in life, for making better decision who is the one to marry.
     
  4. elevate

    elevate Fapstronaut

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    You're being too serious about this. It's not an arranged marriage.

    Dating is exploring another individual. Go into it with curiosity. Have fun. If you two like each other, then you two will find ways to have more fun with each other. Hopefully you find someone that you can grow as a person with and help that person grow as well.

    Don't be so logical about it.
     
  5. Runtilmylegsdropoff

    Runtilmylegsdropoff Fapstronaut

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  6. Runtilmylegsdropoff

    Runtilmylegsdropoff Fapstronaut

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    Or paying the dowry for a lovely lass. 50 goats.
     

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