Help with ED

Hi Jhudd. I've been reading your posts and updates. I think the next time you meet a nice girl, you really need to open up about your ED and talk to her about it. Just gently ease your way into the issue you have, and she'll be understanding. Not every girl is after sex, and if they are, they're no good for you.

The worst thing you can do about any problem, especially ED, is keep it bottled up inside of you. You just need to open up about it, you probably already have, I just missed it.

I'm going through the same problem. Im on day 6 at the moment. I tried having sex for the first time about 2 months ago, and couldn't get it up. Same porn and masturbation problem too. I'm not a doctor, but I think it's definitely psychological. Our brains have become so de-sensitised by porn, and unrealisitc expectations, that it's been re-wired into thinking that porn is the only way you can and will achieve erections, get aroused, and orgasm. I'm in the same position as you. Just keep fighting and DON'T cheat. Be strong willed mentally, and try not to think about any sexual. Read, study for something, do something more productive.

I would also recommend improving your diet more (It might already be good, but just mentioning). Up your intake of Vitamin D and zinc. These two mineral powerhouses are responsible for increasing your testosterone levels. which will increase your sex drive. Go onto Amazon and buy these in tablet form and take one each daily. This is what I'm doing at the moment. I will also tell you to drink more green tea. Green tea contain what's known as catechins, which acts as an anti-inflammatory for your blood vessels, increasing the blood flow, especially down south, where you want it the most.

Keep fighting. Each and everday you fight these urges, means getting one step closer to becoming physically and mentally healthier. The effects of abstaining are working. Keep going.

 

I actually really enjoy reading your story mate.

Except for the girl who send you a video of her giving head. Way too triggering.

Even though i am 31 now, i can see a lot of similarities.\
I have e tip though. I had Pied as well... And the only time i had sex, it was with a girl i was physically attracted to, had a connection with and took it really really slow. We spend much time together, made each other happy, but waited until i was ready for sex. That made all the difference, because i never had to perform. I never had to get the boner. And it took a while to get it.
Maybe this helps for you. Find a girl you really care for, and take your time. Make it about intimacy first.

Keep us updated please

 

Thanks for your story man!! I really appreciate words like yours! It is uplifting to me as well. Same situation I in and have to rewrite to the girl I have now. This weekend is gong to be sleepover but nothing else at this point. I believe taking it slow like this is what will really work for me as well. The nerves and performance anxiety will go down then once we nod. A bit holding, kissing, etc.

How long before you felt you you were okay for sex while rebooting with the girl you had..??

 

It’s good your doing now and not waiting. I am in the same boat but older than you. I hope the journey is going good so far for you. Keep at it and it will get better. You have time to rewrite slowly as well. Your young as well so will not take as long for you to rewire like someone older in thirties like me.

The libido will come back and you will enjoy life much more in your new state of mind. Give us an update at where you are soon.

 

Not that long. 14 Days of seeing and being intimate with each other. The intimacy really was the key for me. She would have slept with me the second we met for the second time. Its was a bit complicated.

It always depends on both. Talk about it, that you dont want to force or rush anything. This way, a good girl will give you the time you need if you make her feel loved, appreciated and beautiful as a wamen.

Relex and just enjoy each others presence. Relaxing with no pressure is the key

 

But be careful with "too slow". I think one of the main reasons that the girl and i were so comfortable is because i made her come literally every day by going down on her, sometimes more then once. And when you comebine going down with fingering, more ofthen then not, it feels even better because you can penetrate her while also gently caring for her clit.

So technically, she kinda always had a strong sexual fulfillment every day, even without actual penetration.

All the best mate

 

So, PIED symptoms for you essentially went away then in about 14 days with intimacy...

 

Dude i have same symtomps whit the skin, but mine is for pelvic floor, but i can get erections.
Maybe ur problem is different about the porn! Just give time to your body, forget that for now. (Dont make my mistake, about think have ED) for me took me 1 month to see what are the real problem cuz all the time think my problem was on mi penis( but was my pelvic floor) i was so stressed and whit a lot of anxiety, wasnt able to relax and get a erection. today i can get erectios super erections because i forget the ED and i am more relaxed. I clear my mind and i look the real problem was the pelvic floor not my penis. So relax buddy give time to your body. Forget about ED or u gotta enter on deprrssion and anxiety.

 

See that’s the conclusion I came to as well the depression and anxiety of withdrawal have to subside and then normal erectilns can come back. The withdrawal symptoms cause this am still we will have to do our best to get over what we did to ourselves. You essentially forget about PIED and relax and you are good to go.

What do you mean by pelvic floor though..??

 

I HAVE PELVIC FLOOR DYSFUCNTION. makes me something call hard flaccid is when ur penis is hard in flaccid (not erection, just feel hard on flacid) and is more hard to get a erection in my case when i am standing. so when i am sit or on bed easily can get erections. thats why i say i have the same symtoms whit skin cuz my penis when i am standing feels hard and looks like the blood dont flow to the penis. but when i am on relax positions is soft.( i can get erections if i am standing but took me like 1 min to get erection full, isnt a problem for me to be honest) all this happend because my pelvic floor is tense and that happend to my penis. when this thing start I SAY I HAVE ED AND BOOM ANXIETY, DEPRESSION, IRRITATION, A COUPLE CRY ON MY BED lol (all got on ur mind and u start lose control). i star relax and i say i am very young to get a ED, so i star searching about all my symtoms and my problem is not my penis is my pelvic floor. NOW I AM RELAX AND MY PENIS GET ERECTIONS ALL MORNING AND WHIT FANTASY SOME CHICKS LOL
i got some problems too: problems for poop (i can, but took me more time or i need push more :V, now i am goin to pee a lot lol, i feel pain on my lower back for like 1 week and dissapear, spasms on my rectum, on the middle part of penis and anus( THE UROLOGIST SAY IS BECAUSE I DONT FAP, AND SEMEN IS THERE CANT REMEMEBER THE PROCESS HE TOLD ME BUT THAT IS OK THATS WHAT HE SAID, i am talking about just for the spasms on middle anus and penis thats urologist say.

 

Can you link me the video somehow, or tell me the title? because I can relate to that a lot.

Anyway I’ll also tell you my progress since I’m 20 days without PMO also because of ED.
I’ve been with two nice girls in the last weeks of erasmus, one I was totally into her, the other one not so much but we know each other since the beginning of the erasmus (I just returned from her place so I have fresh news
I both told them I have this strange kind of ED (not physical problem) so I was pretty confident with them.
The problem is that I mange to get some random erections but they quickly fade. It’s like my brain isn’t ready for sex orgams or I don’t know, I don’t think it’s performance anxiety because I felt totally confident with them.
Anyway, I’m just 20 days without PMO and I hope this will get better, I had no urge to masturbate or watching porn since then and that’s why I am a bit worried, it’s like if I don’t have any urge that means I’m not really an addict so maybe the problem is not related to porn.
But I guess it’s because I also had no sexual life while teen and only masturbated to porn since I was maybe 13 or 14. I guess that really messed up my brain, hope it’s not too late since I’m 23 now.

PS I read some posts, I think if you want to totally rewire you should also stop sexting and asking for pictures of girls, that’s not what you should prepare your brain for, it doesn’t matter if they are real girls who you know in my opinion.

Good luck anyway, I will continue my path util I get rid of this problem (hopefully) so if you do the same we can help each other!

 

YOU should type on google hard flaccid and read all about that ( but the problem is the pelvc floor is like tense, unbalanced, i have this is anoying for me because i cant poop like i was a couple months ago and i am having some pain on my lumbar zone, so i was thinking have ED but wanst that. My problem is the pelvic is tense and i think press some nerves and cant ger blood flow to penis. But when i am sit or on bed my erections are super good makes sense my pelvic floor is relaxed. SO THE ED AND THE 0 LIBIDO WAS FOR THE ANXIETY AND DEPRESSION. I NEVER THINK THE ( ANXIETY. DESESPERATE) CANT MAKE GET ERECTIONS. AT THIS DAY I HAVE 3 MONTHS I HAVE 1 MONTH I STAR GETTING AGAIN ALL MY SEXUAL STUFFS. AND NOW I KNOW MY PROBLEM IS THE PELVIC FLOOR NOT THE PENIS.
SEARCH ABOUT HARD FLACCID IS MORE COMON NAME ON MAN BECASE ALL GUYS THINKS THE PROBLEM IS ON HER PENIS (BUT IS THE PELVIC IS TENSE)
WARNING!! I AM NOT SAYING U HAVE THIS. JUST RELAX TAKE UR TIME. IF U HAVE 0 LIBIDO IS THE BEST TIME TO FOCUS ON STUDIES THATS WHAT I DO WHEN I WAS ON THAT PHASE. DONT TAKE PILLS FOR ERECTIONS OR FOR ANXIETY JUST WAIT CONTROL THE DAMN BRAIN IS REALLY POWERFUL.

 

OH HELL NO.

It was only after around 14 days that i was comfortable to have sex with her. I had PIED throughout the whole time we spend together and probably still have it. We only had sex when i felt like it and more often then not, i didn't finish and my dick became soft inside her after a while.
Many factors conrtributed to that, i felt like i still wanted to just fk and got angry that my dick wouldn't get hard on my commnand, and when i wanted to sleep with her, and also thinking WAY too much about that my dick and her pussy were a missmatch with her being superwet most of the time and also not very tight, and me having a below average sized dick, especially in girth. I was so focussed on getting friction that i ignored the feeling to be with her.

Tie that in with being afraid of getting soft, not because she might get upset, just because i really wanted to keep fkn with her, and couldn't.
Annoying is probably the best word for it.

So yeah i had PIED on and off the whole time, but because we worked together so amazingly well in the bedroom and i wanted to enjoy our time WAY more then i needed to sleep with her, we just made it fun.
We painted pictures with chocolate on each others belly and ate them, while the other person was blindfolded or closing the eyes, teasing each other, just cuddling and kissing while we were lying in bed together, tickling fights, massaging, and i regularly went down on her, just because i enjoy doing that with wamen in general.
I never saw it like a "chore". It's something i can give someone to make that person (very) happy and seeing someone i care for smile and or moan, gives me one of the best feelings in the world.

I will handle every enounter with a girl/wamen in the future, intil i trust my dick again to get hard when i actually would like to sleep with a girl.
The only reason why i am a bit reluctant when it comes to spontaneous sex is because i am just not there yet, due ot that fkn porn and de-sensitization.
But Every day without porn this year was truly a joy and i will never watch it ever again. Because i want to have the possibility to have a quickie as well.

The future is going to be awesome.