Here Goes Everything

Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by Nash2017, Jan 4, 2017.

  1. Nash2017

    Nash2017 Fapstronaut

    I am 30 years old and have finally hit rock bottom with my porn addiction. Unfortunately, I started young (13 or 14) and have used PMO ever since. I have struggled with PIED for forever but always used excuses like "I just had too many beers" and "maybe I just wasn't that into her". I'm 50/50 on whether I can MO and it usually feels like more of a chore than pleasure. I am now on Day 11 and feel like I have been in flatline maybe since I started....maybe was already before, who knows.

    I feel okay and motivated at this point but my biggest fear is how long this recovery may take given my history. My only source of hope is that I had a year long relationship that ended about a year ago where I had a sort of normal sex life. I was able to O with real sex (with some DE), although my head was never in the moment, usually fantasizing about something else. Used a lot less P during that time. Looking back on that relationship, I felt I did rewire to her a good bit and was capable of getting erections without too much effort. So maybe there is hope this won't be one of those 9-24 month reboots that sound terrifying. Glad to have a community to keep me strong.

    "I have long feared that my sins would return to haunt me, and the cost would be more than I could bear." -Benjamin Martin in The Patriot
  2. D . J .

    D . J . Fapstronaut

    Congratulations on 11 days of sobriety!

    Welcome to NoFap where you are amongst friends who are here to encourage you and not judge you.
    AndySky180 and Tiny antelope like this.
  3. Tiny antelope

    Tiny antelope Fapstronaut

    Thanks for sharing your story, you have taken a brave step and made a great start, well done.
    AndySky180 and D . J . like this.
  4. tbird

    tbird Fapstronaut

    Get ready for your brain to play lots of tricks on you. Even though you might feel weird, miserable, confused, irritable, etc., it's all temporary and part of the healing process. Be strong and kick pmo butt!
    AndySky180, Tiny antelope and D . J . like this.

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