Hi nofap community!

Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by Z.e.n.o, Nov 15, 2018.

  1. Z.e.n.o

    Z.e.n.o Fapstronaut

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    Hi everyone!
    I'm here, in this fantastic forum, to make a revolution in my life.
    After years and years of slavery i want to be free from the compulsive pattern of PMO.
    I want to see this as a new starting point in my life, a new journey, a new chapter.
    Because can't go like that anymore.
    I know, to some extent, the benefits of not fapping, because i experienced them more than once. But now i am pointing towards a clear direction: gaining my life back.
    May you experience life in an intense way :)
     
  2. Right on, brother. The abstinent life is much richer and more rewarding, no doubt. Best of luck, my friend.
     
    black_coyote and Z.e.n.o like this.
  3. The Lone Ranger

    The Lone Ranger Fapstronaut

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    Welcome here and good luck with everything. Go all in, you’re worth it!
     
    Z.e.n.o likes this.
  4. hijodelaluna18

    hijodelaluna18 Fapstronaut

    Tell us about it,that way by writing it you truly assume the addict that you are..be specific about dates,when did you started,what negative effects have you experienced...what is your goal.
    You have to publicly compromize.if its 1 month 3 months..set a goal and make it public otherwise you will fail cause nobodys watching but you. be brave...
     
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  5. Z.e.n.o

    Z.e.n.o Fapstronaut

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    Right, is worth it! I cannot edit firse post so i will add here.

    What is fapping to me? I started out when i was 12 if i remember well. Differently from all my male friends, I didn't have the knownledge about what it was, because they started even before, when a male produces transparent sperm. The first time i didn't like, the orgasm was like a strong thing, almost traumatizing. In that moment i said to myself i would have never done that again. NEVER!

    But the days after... in front of the computer, ehehe, nude girls were searched. It started with soft pics, images, hentai (because after all i love manga), and for the first periods these were enough, the see/don't see. I started to do this and as far as i remember, i NEVER approached a single girl since 18 YO. It went on, until i needed strong excitement, so i went for videos. More videos, more fantasy, more strange, more things.. more more more shit. From 12 to 18 all fapping, no talks, no flirts, no speaking, no approaching with a real girl. I never had energy, also because i was lacking fitness. I always was ASHAMED in front of any girl i could easily like. But let's say every human female creature.

    At 18 i met a girl, or to say, a girl liked me and approached me. How sad. She was recycling man worse than plastic factory could recicle petrol. But i kind of fell in love with her. WTF? Her mind was like if she was trying clothes in a shop, but i pathetically stucked to her because she was the only girl that i ever kissed in my life. With heavy difficulties i managed to move on, after 4 days of intense nothing, and by sending her fuck off i met another girl. This lasted 9 months, and after her i met my longest love affair, that lasted 3 years. Good, one may say. But did fapping played any role in that? OF COURSE! It made me sick in making love. I never made love and all experiences were sad. Porns ruined my mind. Fapping between one moments and other.

    Some times, when my partner masturbated me, i was thinking about having sex with some chick. This is sad, very sad. I never cared about the role of my partner fully, almost all my care in having sex was only to feel myself a good sexual partner. No respect for the feminine.

    But some moments of my life were lived fully, without fapping, without the need. In these moments i experienced what benefits one can receive from life. In fact, you start living life, other doors starts to open in your life.

    Now i'm 25 and i'm in a bad mood, bad moment of my life, so, expecially in boredom, i'm wasting my semen almost every day in the desperate search of some juicy of life. But this lead me to sleep all day and having not the will to live life any more. Seriously. I prefer staying in house doing nothing rather than flirt a girl. I'm depressed and without will.

    So my goal is: to stop completely fapping, fantasizing, doing sex without love. My goal is that i will only be making love with a real human being. In a complete way, like a real man; and at the seemingly strange price of saying NO if a girl want to be masturbated with my penis. Why i want this? Because i think this is the highest goal a man, intended as male human being, could have about his sexual life, with different quality and intensity of experience.
    I begun the 90 days challenge and i'm already enjoying this forum.

    If someone is willing to know where this point of view arises from, a link to a tape from an australian master will be here. I love that person (not in the commonly intended way, not at all). He changed my perspective and brought more hope to my life and is a great inspiration. The audio may seem a bit long but in the beginning he talks about the disorders, the unhappines, the disturbances with utmost precision, so one can easily be interested.

    Can there be a difference between sex and love?
    WARNING: It is very different from all commond way of view it. So, take it open minded.



    THAT is the petrol for the engine of my motivation.

    See you on the forum!!

    Francesco, from Italy :emoji_laughing:
     
    Last edited: Nov 16, 2018
    WindMirror and black_coyote like this.
  6. matthew376

    matthew376 Fapstronaut

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    Best of luck, i have just started myself!

    You know youre right, when i think about it i already know what the benefits of abstinence are, from when i unintentionally did it in the past.

    A few years ago i ended up meeting a couple of girls that i really liked being around, and i dont know how but i just told myself i am not going to reduce them to people i pmo about, because they are people, and people i want to be around. I just remember feeling more like myself, getting more attention and not feeling drained all the time. Most importantly i viewed them as people not some fantasy of mine, which made me feel more in touch with reality
     
    Z.e.n.o likes this.
  7. Z.e.n.o

    Z.e.n.o Fapstronaut

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    Thanks man :) i wish you may get all the benefits of this experience. Your story is heart warming, is an example for every fapstronaut
     
    black_coyote likes this.
  8. Welcome, Francesco! You will find many helpful posts and people here to assist you in your journey... Glad you've decided to take that first step! your goals are admirable. I'm praying for your success!
     
    black_coyote and Z.e.n.o like this.
  9. hijodelaluna18

    hijodelaluna18 Fapstronaut

    I can relate..thiking about women as sexual objects is real! during the last few years when my addiction was at it high I really thought every woman in the world was basically the same with no unique or indiidual atributes.They didnt seem unique or special to me like now after NOFAP. All I cared was fantasize about them giving me oral sex.
    I still look at them as sexual objets but I start to feel other things towards them.
    Looking back on my past relationships I used to blame them but now I see I wasnt able to love those girls cause I was only addicted to them sexually.I really didnt care about them. I was a selfish ass.But those are the kind of men women are atracted to..the problem was when I could not get hard.
    You are at a good age to recover your life,25 is a wonderful age to turn your life around.Im a bit late at 37 but still hope to meet girls and have meaningful relationships.Its been6 years I dont share an intimate moment with a woman.I dont know how I came to this situation.but ED,insecurities,low income,family issues it all came together
    Im hopin this reboot is a new begining
     
    black_coyote and Z.e.n.o like this.
  10. Plaximos

    Plaximos Fapstronaut

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    Welcome, i'm new too!
     
    Z.e.n.o likes this.
  11. black_coyote

    black_coyote Fapstronaut

    Welcome to the community z.e.n.o! You got people here who can relate with you, we are all connected in some way

    You know that bad times can't last long. Its time to say goodbye to the victim mindset. Its time to take control of your actions..Keep on moving my friend. Plan out your days and work out your plans.

    I think keeping a journal and recording your progress would help you a lot!

    Stay strong friend!

    Good luck! Sending all my good vibes to you!
     
    Z.e.n.o likes this.
  12. Z.e.n.o

    Z.e.n.o Fapstronaut

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    Thanks my friend :D i am keeping a written journal of this experience. You hit a fundamental point in me: the victim mindset!!
    We are moving forward, may you have the best good vibes :)
     
    black_coyote likes this.

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