Hi there all ! Newbie but determined to beat PMO

Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by Beamer, Oct 10, 2017.

  1. Beamer

    Beamer NoFap Moderator
    Staff Member

    Hi all,
    I am a gay man from Belgium, age 55, and i been using internet porn since 2000.
    In the beginning it was quit harmless, but over the years i looked for more and intenser porn as you probably are familiar with, i was no exception... My self esteem, self respect went down the drain very fast, and life was more hell each day. During all this, I had a relationship with a younger guy from 2005 until may 2016 , and when he left me for a woman, i was devastated. You can guess the result, i went very deep with my PMO addiction and it was never that bad and troublesome. I was a wreck for more than a year but somehow managed to stay at work and hide all my sadness and problems with PMO.

    I am not really a social guy in irl so i have no real friends who i could talk to.
    I looked for help for my porn addiction through books and websites but i failed in kicking off and it all started again, it never really ended anyway...

    Last Saturday i saw a documentary on Netflix where NoFap was presented (ShowView) and i instantly knew that i had to try it because otherwise i would soon hit a very thick brick wall (work, no sleep, excessive masturbation,...). I felt so sorry for Sofyan, one of the younger guys in the documentary and i realised how enormous devastating this PMO really is, it was frightening. My decision was very quickly made:
    I started instantly that night as my first PMO free day, today is the 3rd day and i already have lots of energy and positive expectations. I am fully aware that this is euphoria and that the bad days are yet to come. I know they will come, but no pain, no gain right ?

    So, it is the first real light in my life since 1,5 years, and i intend to do this right.
    I will try to interact with you guys, for i believe that together is always stronger than alone, and each one of you knows the problem in some way. Unity and bonding for the same cause is a very strong weapon to use against PMO and related skum.
    I also believe helping others makes you happy inside, it is free and gives great satisfation and rest of the mind.
    So, if I can help with a talk or whatever, just ask, i don't bite :)
    The first step to a cure is always admitting to yourself there is a real big problem, so don't feel guilty or ashamed, we all are in the same boat, ok ?
    Good luck and courage to all here and thx for reading this !

    Beamer
     
    Last edited: Mar 4, 2018
    Basith, guyinsideout, max9292 and 5 others like this.
  2. going4gold

    going4gold Fapstronaut

    15
    70
    13
    Welcome and I wish you well. Working on day 23 for me. I am so determined to make this work. The rewards are immediate but the struggle to beat this addiction is relentless, so far. I am doing so much more with my daily life that I will not go back. Confident but not cocky (heh heh).
     
    Beamer likes this.
  3. Beamer

    Beamer NoFap Moderator
    Staff Member

    Thx , i'm glad you are doing well ! Keep on going there :)
     
  4. Beamer

    Beamer NoFap Moderator
    Staff Member

    My friend,
    Thank you for your kind words :)
    Thank you for reminding me of my own writing ! :)) I had completely forgotten it !
    I read it again with some mixed emotions, i recall the mood i was in at the time. Today, i am enjoying a much better life, without despair and loneliness thanks to people like you,
    who support me and so many other people here on NoFap :) Thank you buddy, you're awesome ! :)
    If i ever make it to 100 days, i will use some or all of this post as the start of the description of my noFap journey, because it really was ! :)
    Have a great day ! :)
     
    2525 likes this.
  5. It is very seldom I doubt what people write. But, I do doubt the "If" in the above sentence. Take it ODAT, take it easy. Having a rough day or hour? Try one of these:

    • Easy Does It
    • Live and Let Live
    • Let it Go
    • Keep it Simple
    • Came to Believe
    If they don't work, just look in the mirror and say, "Beamer will kick your but if you don't make 100 days and he's a a bad ass". <smile>

    But, seriously, it's about living in the now. Because, despite what quantum mechanics tells us about the quantum world, up here in the macro world, one thing follow another.

    - L

    PS: I know you understood that. But if not it's cause I just woke up from my nap.
     
    2525 and Beamer like this.
  6. Beamer

    Beamer NoFap Moderator
    Staff Member

    My friend,
    That made me smile, thank you !
    The "if" is because i want to stay humble here, i can relapse every minute, and i don't want to claim anything that isn't a fact today, so that's why :)
    It doesn't mean i will not do anything i can to reach 100 days: i wake up with my reboot, i go to sleep with it, i breath it, the 100 days mark is for now the most important thing in my life, because mentally, it's a milestone i need for myself, "for Beamer", to prove myself i have my willpower and common sense back, that i am finally healing from my addiction.
    I probably will not be cured, no, but it will be proof of the fact i'm recovering!
    I will indeed take things ODAT because that's how our macro world works as you put it :)
    Thank you again for reminding me of that post, it helps me focus even more on why this important for the rest of my life, for my pmo free future ! :)
     
    2525 likes this.
  7. OK I'll tell you a joke. You most likely have seen me post it before. But in case it's new to you.

    There are 10 kinds of people in the world: those that understand binary math and those that don't.

    <smile>

    - L
     
    Beamer likes this.
  8. Odigi13

    Odigi13 Fapstronaut

    55
    117
    33
    Am not gonna say am homophobe but in my country,religion,family and me as well we're not okay with gay and when i started reading your story and saw that you're gay i almost left but i said let me read soo i kept reading and i found your story really amazing am too young compared to you and your story helped because if a 55years old person can quit PMOs then me who's 17 i can do it too so thank you for your story and keep going on in your journey to fully quit PMOs.
    And me too am starting my 90day challenge i hope i'll go far and maybe stop porn and masturbation.
     
    Beamer likes this.
  9. Beamer

    Beamer NoFap Moderator
    Staff Member

    @Odigi13 : Thank you for reading my story and your comment :)
    I hope you will succeed in quitting pmo, all my best buddy ! :)
     
    Odigi13 likes this.
  10. Where are you from Odigi?
     
    Beamer likes this.
  11. Odigi13

    Odigi13 Fapstronaut

    55
    117
    33
    Heyy @IGY am from Rwanda. What about you?
     
    Beamer likes this.
  12. Rwanda - exciting! I have never spoken to a Rwandan before. I am from England (United Kingdom).
     
    Beamer likes this.
  13. Odigi13

    Odigi13 Fapstronaut

    55
    117
    33
    Feel free to talk @IGY
     
    Beamer likes this.

Share This Page