History of drug abuse, ADD and porn

[SpacePumpkin]

So I'm not going to get too into the topic of drug abuse because the connotations that come with that topic can be a real killer to conversation and insight from people who can't exactly relate, and that's not what I want to do. I would like the opinion of anyone and everyone from both sides of the drug, no-drug divide and I welcome your input. Here's my (brief) story and my dilemma:

I spent nearly all of my early twenties partying. Hard. And my addiction to pornography started long before that, in my mid teens. Eventually I got into doing cocaine and MDMA pretty heavily and spent about two years of my life doing those drugs in pretty extreme excess. And they fed my porn addiction in the worst way. Getting wicked high and looking at, watching, and collecting porn and masturbating for HOURS was a crazy experience. It's messed up, but even now, 4 years later, I get butterflies at the thought. Honestly, it's so triggering that I can't think about it too long. Ugh. Anyways! Thankfully I was able to pull myself out of that cycle and I haven't touched hard drugs in in 3 years. But they damage they did I fear I will never escape.

Now, in college, I find I have a really hard time focusing and studying. It's become such a problem that I talked to my doctor about the issue and he believes I have likely had ADD for some time (drug induced or not, who knows). Regardless, he and I are working through some drugs to try and combat that. Ritalin is a terrible drug and I refuse to take it after trying it and my doc says the next drug he would like to try is adderall. I don't know what other's opinions are about this but, from what I persoanlly remember, adderall leaves me with a very similar feeling to cocaine and I know that that feeling is a major trigger.

Does anyone else have any insight on whether or not they've struggled with ADD meds and pornography? Has it enhanced anyone's addiction or become a triggering sensation for you? Maybe you've only ever taken adderall, maybe you've only ever done cocaine, maybe you've done both. I'm just trying to decide whether or not this is a good idea for me.

I really want to responsibly use this drug to help me focus in school but I'm worried that it could ruin me given my history. I've never had an addictive personality when it comes to drugs but pornography has woven deep, poisonous tendrils throughout my life, and it manifests itself with incredible ease given the slightest chance. Thanks in advance for your thoughts!

 

[LilD]

How long was your longest no-porn streak? If you haven't had any, I'd suggest trying it before any drugs. Lack of concentration may be one of the symptoms of porn abuse, so I'd also suggest you asking your doctor about that. Maybe show him some articles from yourbrainonporn.com, so he could give you a professional opinion.

If those meds are triggering for you, you're going to relapse sooner or later, that's just how it works. If the only reason to take them is to fight something caused by your porn addiction when you're in a vicious circle. Porn -> lack of attention -> meds -> porn. To break this circle you need to fight the cause, not the symptoms. And I bet you it's the porn.

 

[Immature]

I'm prescribed adderall for ADD. Except possibly at the beginning, you shouldn't be getting a high from adderall - just improved focus/concentration.

I am pretty sure that adderall had little or no effect on my porn usage. I was on adderall for most of a year before my porn use got out of hand, and that happened when I retired. An idle mind is the devil's workshop. (That expression is usually about "idle hands", but that's surely not right in this context!)

 

[SpacePumpkin]

How long was your longest no-porn streak? If you haven't had any, I'd suggest trying it before any drugs. Lack of concentration may be one of the symptoms of porn abuse, so I'd also suggest you asking your doctor about that. Maybe show him some articles from yourbrainonporn.com, so he could give you a professional opinion.

If those meds are triggering for you, you're going to relapse sooner or later, that's just how it works. If the only reason to take them is to fight something caused by your porn addiction when you're in a vicious circle. Porn -> lack of attention -> meds -> porn. To break this circle you need to fight the cause, not the symptoms. And I bet you it's the porn.

That's a great point that I should've been contemplating, thanks for bringing it up. I have to get a steak going before I start with the meds. I've just never been convicted enough to really go long enough to try. But I'm really trying to change.

I'm prescribed adderall for ADD. Except possibly at the beginning, you shouldn't be getting a high from adderall - just improved focus/concentration.

I am pretty sure that adderall had little or no effect on my porn usage. I was on adderall for most of a year before my porn use got out of hand, and that happened when I retired. An idle mind is the devil's workshop. (That expression is usually about "idle hands", but that's surely not right in this context!)

That's encouraging to hear. The idle... mind is something I'm currently trying to work on lol. Being alone in my apartment with nothing to do is when I am most in danger of relapse.

So glad I came across this. I've struggled with inattentive ADD all my life and am currently on Focalin which really helps me with school..I can relate to the hour long binge searches looking for the perfect high and partying etc. These drugs aren't addictive for people who actually have the condition btw and I don't like Adderall because of the comedown, but it did make me super horny lol. I've tried Adderall Vyvanse, Strattera and Concerta in the past and Addy is the worst for that in my case. Porn makes adhd worse though so cut that out of your life

I'm glad you found my post too! Thanks for the insight. I was hoping to hear from someone who had tried a few different medications and who could relate to what I've experienced.

When you say come downs from adderall, do you mean a super anxious, restless feeling? I experienced a feeling like that when coming down from Methylphenidate and it's awful. It's why I refused to take it again.

I'll also have to ask my doctor about Focalin

 

[Deleted Account]

The thing about add meds is they shouldn't give you urges if you actually need them because people with add adhd don't get a buzz off of them.i don't have adhd and I get a speed like buzz which could defo give me urges to pmo

Try valium or alprozam there great for anxiety but I find making streaks easier when I'm on them

 

[Grebyn]

So I'm not going to get too into the topic of drug abuse because the connotations that come with that topic can be a real killer to conversation and insight from people who can't exactly relate, and that's not what I want to do. I would like the opinion of anyone and everyone from both sides of the drug, no-drug divide and I welcome your input. Here's my (brief) story and my dilemma:

I spent nearly all of my early twenties partying. Hard. And my addiction to pornography started long before that, in my mid teens. Eventually I got into doing cocaine and MDMA pretty heavily and spent about two years of my life doing those drugs in pretty extreme excess. And they fed my porn addiction in the worst way. Getting wicked high and looking at, watching, and collecting porn and masturbating for HOURS was a crazy experience. It's messed up, but even now, 4 years later, I get butterflies at the thought. Honestly, it's so triggering that I can't think about it too long. Ugh. Anyways! Thankfully I was able to pull myself out of that cycle and I haven't touched hard drugs in in 3 years. But they damage they did I fear I will never escape.

Now, in college, I find I have a really hard time focusing and studying. It's become such a problem that I talked to my doctor about the issue and he believes I have likely had ADD for some time (drug induced or not, who knows). Regardless, he and I are working through some drugs to try and combat that. Ritalin is a terrible drug and I refuse to take it after trying it and my doc says the next drug he would like to try is adderall. I don't know what other's opinions are about this but, from what I persoanlly remember, adderall leaves me with a very similar feeling to cocaine and I know that that feeling is a major trigger.

Does anyone else have any insight on whether or not they've struggled with ADD meds and pornography? Has it enhanced anyone's addiction or become a triggering sensation for you? Maybe you've only ever taken adderall, maybe you've only ever done cocaine, maybe you've done both. I'm just trying to decide whether or not this is a good idea for me.

I really want to responsibly use this drug to help me focus in school but I'm worried that it could ruin me given my history. I've never had an addictive personality when it comes to drugs but pornography has woven deep, poisonous tendrils throughout my life, and it manifests itself with incredible ease given the slightest chance. Thanks in advance for your thoughts!

Man, i have ADD too. I do NOT want to live off these drugs, even if they say it will ''help'' Personally i think it will only help in the short term, not the long term. If it's a trigger to you, i would stay off it. However, you decide of course. I have learned to live with this, and so can you. For the sake of your best.

 

[SpacePumpkin]

Man, i have ADD too. I do NOT want to live off these drugs, even if they say it will ''help'' Personally i think it will only help in the short term, not the long term. If it's a trigger to you, i would stay off it. However, you decide of course. I have learned to live with this, and so can you. For the sake of your best.

That's one thing I want to avoid too: dependence on a drug to function. Even if that dependence is my own mental construct. It's encouraging to hear that you've learned to deal with it without the meds. I think getting a streak and seeing if that helps is the better option anyways. Still trying!