HOCD and blood flow to the penis need help !

Discussion in 'Problematic Sexual Behavior' started by 19m, May 9, 2019.

  1. 19m

    19m Fapstronaut

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    Hey guys this is freaking me out because this has never happened to me before. All of a sudden when i think about my porn induced fetishes which is crossdressers and guys with a nice ass like when i think about it blood flows to my penis and this has never happened before. Also when i say to my self out loud its a man it goes down and its scaring me. the thing is it doesn't happen to women anymore. Is that because i'm so Desensitized to women and that is my hocd doing this to my brain and blood flow or am i bi? like when i think of it like just being with a man with a big butt my blood flows to my penis and its scaring me because this has never happened to me. Do i need to just accept that i might be bi or do i fight it ? I just don't know what to do anymore and its ruening my life. :( Has this happened to anyone else ? Id love to know !
     
  2. zuzu123

    zuzu123 Fapstronaut

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    Hey man, Well I have a similar case as you. Gay thoughts arouse me and the woman body on it is own not much. I have no idea what you are, you can only decide it yourself. Ofcourse there is a chance you could be gay, bi or hetero. You only define yourself in the way you act and what is in your heart. If you desire to be with a woman than do that. Maybe check to get psychological help. I get it for this aswell and I told my story. They dont say im gay based on all this. even though in my head I believe I am. For me it is even harder because im in a relationship with a woman and have sex with her, but I still believe there is a big chance that I could be gay. I dont want to be gay or desire to be a man. You dont have to decide until you are more sure about it, it could be all the porn that u have watched and it could be just a fantasy. Maybe u are bit of both. Sexuality is not black or white. Just have to accept who you are will reveal itself in the end and whatever that sexuality you have will be fine. What u should do it stop the thoughts and searching. What u desire in the real world will come naturally and porn and googling symptoms isnt natural. So just continue nofap and see after. I was depressed, video game addicted and porn addicted my whole teen life. Im desensitized for sure. Now I quit all those I start to think about all the things in my life. I do find both sexes attractive, meaning they are good looking. Although I have no sexual desire to any man in real life, even if you do that is fine. I want sex and a relationship with a woman and I do so even though right now I dont feel fulfilled I have the hope it will be fine, once im recovered. Focus on yourself and happiness first, the rest comes later.
     
  3. The confusion that you body described is the worst part about P.

    Let's simplify it:

    Sexuality is not black and white, and very much open to suggestion. Think of the ancient Greeks.

    Sexuality is closely related to other things, like dominance and submissiveness -- power and slavery.

    These are very easy to get tangled up.

    From what I've seen, most gay relationships are over-sexualized, and play too much upon power dynamic.

    Real love, what I have with my wife, is an amazing blend of sexuality, power dynamic, selfless compassion, and a balance of masculine and feminine that satisfies our souls.

    Does that make sense?

    The whole point of nofap is to stop over-sexualizing life. And, honestly, gay thoughts are a perversion of sexualization and dominance.

    You're just tangled up.

    As you untangle yourself, you'll feel the beauty of women deep in your heart, and you'll feel your masculinity.

    Dont continue to confuse and feminized yourself.
     
    Bay likes this.
  4. 19m

    19m Fapstronaut

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    I will stop and what ive realized is that if i picture it and say can i make real love and love this person my penis goes down.
     
  5. 19m

    19m Fapstronaut

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    Thanks ! like i said to the other person when i think about this i ask could i make real love with this person and have a loving relationship and when i do this and ask myself this my penis goes down and also i don't find guys attractive either as well nor do i want to be with one. but the porn really really confuses me.
     
  6. InnerFaith

    InnerFaith Fapstronaut

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    the real issue here is, why do you keep exposing yourself to pornography?
    its a bottomless pit with porn, if you keep digging it you will discover scarier things about your sexuality than just being bi.
     
  7. 19m

    19m Fapstronaut

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    im not anymore i actually have CURED my porn induced fetish and ed basically in just a few days all i did was medidtate as for the negative energy and my problems to go away and then bam they were gone i could finally just think of a lady and get horny again it was a miracle !
     

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