HOCD in a relationship

You'll have back your attraction for your gf , keep going.

Don't watch any video , don't watch porn , pictures , nothing. Gay or hetero.
It needs some months, if you respond to triggers even more time.

An effective weapon to overcome urges and thoughts : mindfulness.
The brain will try to win you and to get some triggers for the seek of dopamine. Resist

 

Yes, it can and does go away. For whatever reason, that time period between 13 and 16 or 17 was pretty bad for me when I was growing up. I imagine that's the case with a lot of people who've experienced something similar. You're already on the right track with realizing that there are problems with P and M. Do not make the mistake I and I'm sure others have made, thinking that we can mold or determine our sexuality with P and M. PM are drugs that demand further stimulus rather than tools that help us explore. They do nothing for us and you will have a much healthier sexuality without them! So keep it up

 

I'm glad you have a goal you want to detox yourself for! Stopping PMO is really a detox, both mind and body. Watching P is eroding your will power and creates (H)OCD and much more misery. You are still young so you haven't got a long history of P addiction and should be able to get clean pretty quickly.

The way to do it for me, is becoming aware of your mind and it's tricks to get you to start watching again. Things like 'I need to..., I really want to..., I cannot live without..., I can get away with..., it's not a problem to..., just one more time...' and so on is the way your mind will make you relapse. However, you need to be aware of these mind tricks and get a grip on your thoughts to get back your freedom. You might try to start meditating or practicing mindfulness. It radically changes the way you look at yourself and deal with your own thinking which will make you stronger so you can really stop. Your girlfriend will love it, just like you!

 

The point you touched on around the lockdown really doesn't help either!! It's been a very difficult few months and the lockdown has probably taken more of a toll on people then they're aware of...stay away from any of that P crap even if completely bored - exercise & KEEP BUSY...use the time to make some life changes that you will live by. Plan your days in advance, make your bed (the first win of each day -sounds silly but it starts to build a routine) cold showers, eat clean, get fit/challenge your body & help others. It will get better mate but it takes time.

 

I second what @LoveIsAllWeNeed has said. As for your question, @MrAlkali , I don't have a specific time and no one will be able to say "oh, this is when it will go away". I know that's what you desperately want to hear, because it's what I wanted to hear more than anything too. So here's some parting advice: don't worry about it.

Having homosexual inclinations or thoughts is perfectly natural and does not necessarily make you homosexual. Do you sometimes have thoughts about murdering people? That doesn't make you a murderer. Sure, we'd all like to not have such and such thoughts, but that's the nature of thoughts, they come and go. So don't linger on them.

Also, don't worry about trying to be more attracted to your girlfriend. Attraction ebbs and flows and trying to keep the same level and intensity of attraction is exhausting to try and impossible to achieve. There will be time's that you're wild about her and time's when you wonder why you even wanted a gf in the first place haha.

In any case, all that to say don't worry about it and keep clean. Hope this helps.

 

Yes, I'd say the more you distance yourself from PM the more you'll be naturally aroused by your gf. Of course, age is a factor too and things will shake out for the best! Especially since you are conscious of quitting before you've really begun anything harmful. Best of luck to you and your future wife!

 

I think of you keep an open mind, perhaps admit of bicuriosity or Heteroflexibility, and abstain from PMO then what you want will eventually come clear