Hopefully not another lonliness post: how I combat lonliness alone

Discussion in 'Loneliness' started by DayAfterTomorrow, Jun 24, 2020.

  1. DayAfterTomorrow

    DayAfterTomorrow New Fapstronaut

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    I wanted to at least contribute and share my thoughts on lonliness and provide what I do to combat it. I've come to learn in my experience that lonliness is not about not having anyone, it's really about being dissatisfied or unfulfilled with the level of intimacy and connection that exists in our current relationships whether they be sexual or not. As a result of this, I feel as though several of us turn to others to seek the intimacy and connection we crave when in reality, we need to understand who we are and how we are feeling and have a good connection with ourselves first if we want other people to be able to connect with us. It's hard for others to get to know us when we don't even know ourselves. As a result of feeling lonely, I do two things every single day that have helped me: I journal and I listen to a podcast. It's like my daily lonliness homework assignment. I think journaling or writing out feelings really does help us connect with ourselves. I think since the majority of us are so used to suppressing our thoughts and emotions, that simply journaling or having a conversation with ourselves allows us to get to know more about who we are and how we're currently feeling which I think is a crucial part to kicking this once and for all. Secondly, I feel like it allows us to feel emotions we ignored or didn't even realize were there. Finally, I listen to the podcast (Google podcasts on sex addiction, lonliness, etc. There are tons) as it gives me reassurance that how I'm feeling isn't foreign or strange and that thousands of other people are currently or have felt how I have. You can't help but think people....they make podcasts and books on feelings you're going through....you're not the first and only one who experiences this. Hopefully this helps.
     
  2. Awedouble

    Awedouble Fapstronaut

    Welcome to the forum. You're talking about intrapersonal connection vs. interpersonal, both are necessary and are just different levels - and of course if you don't know yourself it's harder to really connect with others in a deep way. I don't think just "working on ourselves" in the self help way is enough, if someone doesn't have something that inspires them it would be healthier if they do find something.

    Also just a thought but your mention of journaling gave me the idea of a dialogue pattern, like instead of just writing down whatever comes in to your mind you might write, then have a reading session - then reply/respond to that. I'm not sure how exactly that'll go but it should help one insight build upon another over time...
     
    DayAfterTomorrow likes this.

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