How can I be more determined?

Invite a friend over or go out somewhere with a friend—just make sure it isn't someone you associate with sexually at all. If someone else is there, you can hardly just rip out P and start MO. If you don't know many people in your area, perhaps go to a club—just don't get wasted.

 

From what I have experience some people are motivated by a goal. The desire to reach that goal fuels their determination.

Other people are very different and can only be determined if there's some threat.

 

We're all in this boat to some degree. What helps me is to train my determination in other area's rather than waiting for the porn gorilla to take over my brain and try and fail to fight it out. The weird thing is that I can go for weeks without temptation but when temptations trikes I tend to fold pretty quickly if I'm not on my game. Cold showers are the ultimate mental training tool for me.

 

You can't stop the urges you have to just let them wear themselves out. The simple truth is they are not permanent, typically they will end in half an hour or so. And each time you do not act on them the more confident you will become. 'Simply' experience them and do not act on them. Your addicted mind may be very impressed with their force... but in truth it is an illusion... (like the thought that you will have a heart attack and instantly die when you feel the cold water of a shower blasting on your head neck and spine). Just as you can learn (improving with daily repetition) to not freak out in a cold shower so you can also learn to not freak out from an urge. It takes practice. In the end an urge is your body and emotional part of your mind anticipating that you will succumb to fapping. Once you break the cycle of giving in to this and have not given in to your 'peak urge' (mine was around a month into reboot) then you will a) have the confidence you can beat any urge b) they will start to diminish

 

I saw a post on here once. It said, "You don't need motivation. Motivation can only be relied on when you're feeling good. What you really need is discipline, the willingness to deal with being uncomfortable, even miserable, to accomplish your goals. I think that's what Jack is saying, he just has a lot more success to back it up with than I do. (I'm getting there though)
You need to find something worth fighting for. It's likely either a loved one or yourself, so revisit why it's important for you to be pmo free. Orient your life around that goal, not just nofap. Let nofap simply become a part of reaching that goal you have/will set for yourself.
Also, shake up your entire life. Develop new routines, new habits, a new place where you sit down. You are dealing with neural pathways that have become used to a certain pattern. Change it all. Change how your furniture is set up, move your computer to a different room and don't move it back, start going to bed and waking up early, start some kind of new exercise, etc. You can come up with more on your own. Make a list and commit to being a real man.
I know you've got this. It may take you time, and you may fall down a lot more, but you will keep trying, because that's the kind of person who you are.

 

^ This. You cannot defeat any addiction or bad habit simply by trying to prevent yourself from seeing triggers or getting urges. It'll work for a short period, but then the moment you do run into a trigger you didn't account for, or an urge comes - you give in, and you're back to square one.

It is not about removing the urges or triggers, but it is instead about adapting so that neither an urge or a trigger can compel you to give in.

We are constantly seeking the easy way out in our lives. The drug addict (speaking from personal past experiences here) wants to be able to quit without experiencing withdrawal, so they do everything they can to put off the inevitable - they lower their doses, they try to quit over a long period of time rather than going cold turkey. The harsh fact of the matter though is that no amount of babying the process is going to make it easy - when they stop, whether it's after a taper, or cold turkey, it's going to suck, it's going to be unpleasant, and you're going to have to endure it. The sooner you endure it, the sooner you can be on the other side of it all, and have that behind you.

An analogy for this that I just thought of and really like, is those chase scenes in movies where the character makes the seemingly strange decision to run upstairs away from the enemy - trapping themselves at the top of the building. This is what most of us do. We see something that we're afraid of, or that looks difficult, or that seems a threat, and we just immediately turn and run the opposite way - even if that particular way means running up to the top of the building and being trapped between our fear and a very steep fall to our deaths. The real solution is to turn, face the enemy, and make a bolt for the front door while you still have a chance. It might be scary, it might be risky, but it's the only option you have. The way out is through.

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So to summarise: It's going to be difficult. There is no way of making this process easy on yourself. There are ways to ensure you're more likely to succeed, but at the end of the day, you HAVE to be able to endure some hardship, if you want any chance at success. Be prepared to stick it out even if it gets unbearably tough.

With regards to urges, you need to realise that they are temporary. The average urge to fap probably lasts less than 5 minutes. That's 300 seconds you have to tough it out and deny the urges for. The reason we give into the urges is because the moment they appear, we take on this defeatist attitude as if they were going to last forever, and we immediately indulge them by starting to head for our favourite porn site or engaging in sexual fantasy. The answer instead is to immediately remind yourself: This will pass, now I need to distract myself for the next few minutes.

Open up a video game, or watch some TV, or do something else that allows you to relax without engaging in your urges if you experience them. Don't allow yourself to have even a single sexual thought during a period of urges - the moment one occurs, distract yourself again with something non-sexual.

If that's still not working, go to your freezer, grab something frozen, and shove it down your underwear for a moment so all the blood rushes back out of your genitals. You thought I was joking? Nope, I'm completely serious.

If you're unable to ride out the urges with regular measures - then take extreme measures. This is not an easy challenge or battle - it is one you have to be prepared for, you can't just "hope you succeed at NoFap" - you have to take the right measures, have the right level of determination, and commit to doing it properly.

 

I like to think of motivation as the pull me up, and discipline as making a beeline to your goals. It's very inspiring to see very successful people and wonder how to get there yourself. The inspiration compels you to stop thinking and start doing. Although this type of energy is very short lived because it was just the excess energy from the person you were watching that you absorbed. Many of us cannot access this higher energy because we don't know how to generate it ourselves. This is where discipline comes in because your reality is a reflection of your inner being. In order to be successful you need to create it yourself.

Sorry I don't have time to think of some advice customized to your situation. But what others have posted are good advice that I agree with.