How Deleting Social Media Helped Me

J

Jharpeskie

Fapstronaut
Social media was one of those things that I thought was necessary to modern life. The thought of deleting my network was inconvenient and all a bit too scary. Now having been free from all social media for 5 months I feel like a free man! Here is how it has helped me with Nofap:

- Instagram babes: This was a big trap for me, not only are there instagram models that are absolute inhumanly attractive, but some of my friends post provocative photos that trigger my sexual drive. Now, It's just not there for me, there is no mega-insta-babe temptations! I'm free from the early morning browse.

- Random posts: From time to time on Facebook I would get random provocative posts come across my wall, the worst were pornographic videos, the mildest, similar to instagram, were the babes!

- Loneliness & FOMO: The way I experience loneliness has changed, no longer do I see a billion photos of happy couples, or friends having the best time together, no longer am I invited to events that I can't make. And because I don't see these things, I don't feel like I'm missing out on them. It's helped my social anxiety a lot.

- Friends: I know who my real friends are now, because they're the people I want to intentionally communicate with and also, the ones who intentionally seek to communicate with me. This has also highlighted that I need to work on my relationships a bit more, which I wouldn't have realised had I continued with Facebook.

- Authenticity: I'm no longer trying to portray a public image and that gives me the freedom to be authentic to myself and those around me - rather than curating a profile for others to see. People make judgments on your character and personality based on photos and posts, some of those things are fabricated lies rather than the truth too. Now if someone wants to get to know me, and I them, we both have to work at it. This is good for me with women too, as I often would be interested in someone but be turned off by some small detail I found on their Facebook/Instagram, now that FB is gone, I have to get to know a woman before I make up my mind on whether they'd be a good mate.

Overall the most important positive outcome for me in removing myself from FB, Insta, Snapchat, etc. is that there is a massive reduction in my exposure to negative/provocative stimuli. I have more control over the stimuli that cause a neurological trigger, and it has given me much greater control on my NoFap journey, almost at the day 60 and really proud of myself for getting here. I hope to never PM ever again.
 
Jharpeskie said:
Social media was one of those things that I thought was necessary to modern life. The thought of deleting my network was inconvenient and all a bit too scary. Now having been free from all social media for 5 months I feel like a free man! Here is how it has helped me with Nofap:

- Instagram babes: This was a big trap for me, not only are there instagram models that are absolute inhumanly attractive, but some of my friends post provocative photos that trigger my sexual drive. Now, It's just not there for me, there is no mega-insta-babe temptations! I'm free from the early morning browse.

- Random posts: From time to time on Facebook I would get random provocative posts come across my wall, the worst were pornographic videos, the mildest, similar to instagram, were the babes!

- Loneliness & FOMO: The way I experience loneliness has changed, no longer do I see a billion photos of happy couples, or friends having the best time together, no longer am I invited to events that I can't make. And because I don't see these things, I don't feel like I'm missing out on them. It's helped my social anxiety a lot.

- Friends: I know who my real friends are now, because they're the people I want to intentionally communicate with and also, the ones who intentionally seek to communicate with me. This has also highlighted that I need to work on my relationships a bit more, which I wouldn't have realised had I continued with Facebook.

- Authenticity: I'm no longer trying to portray a public image and that gives me the freedom to be authentic to myself and those around me - rather than curating a profile for others to see. People make judgments on your character and personality based on photos and posts, some of those things are fabricated lies rather than the truth too. Now if someone wants to get to know me, and I them, we both have to work at it. This is good for me with women too, as I often would be interested in someone but be turned off by some small detail I found on their Facebook/Instagram, now that FB is gone, I have to get to know a woman before I make up my mind on whether they'd be a good mate.

Overall the most important positive outcome for me in removing myself from FB, Insta, Snapchat, etc. is that there is a massive reduction in my exposure to negative/provocative stimuli. I have more control over the stimuli that cause a neurological trigger, and it has given me much greater control on my NoFap journey, almost at the day 60 and really proud of myself for getting here. I hope to never PM ever again.
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Great post @Jharpeskie!
 
I like this topic. People my age all live on social media but I can't get into it. I want to have face to face interaction but it can be difficult sometimes. Social media is definitely a burden but I feel like it could help facilitate real life interaction and I'm kind of put in the dark since I never use it. That being said I think the world would be a better place if people started talking irl more and we're not replying so heavily on their phones. I don't want to sound too negative about it, but I feel like it's a serious problem that is hurting my generation and is making permanent mental and behavioral changes in people that reduces the quality of social interaction.
 
Jharpeskie said:
Social media was one of those things that I thought was necessary to modern life. The thought of deleting my network was inconvenient and all a bit too scary. Now having been free from all social media for 5 months I feel like a free man! Here is how it has helped me with Nofap:

- Instagram babes: This was a big trap for me, not only are there instagram models that are absolute inhumanly attractive, but some of my friends post provocative photos that trigger my sexual drive. Now, It's just not there for me, there is no mega-insta-babe temptations! I'm free from the early morning browse.

- Random posts: From time to time on Facebook I would get random provocative posts come across my wall, the worst were pornographic videos, the mildest, similar to instagram, were the babes!

- Loneliness & FOMO: The way I experience loneliness has changed, no longer do I see a billion photos of happy couples, or friends having the best time together, no longer am I invited to events that I can't make. And because I don't see these things, I don't feel like I'm missing out on them. It's helped my social anxiety a lot.

- Friends: I know who my real friends are now, because they're the people I want to intentionally communicate with and also, the ones who intentionally seek to communicate with me. This has also highlighted that I need to work on my relationships a bit more, which I wouldn't have realised had I continued with Facebook.

- Authenticity: I'm no longer trying to portray a public image and that gives me the freedom to be authentic to myself and those around me - rather than curating a profile for others to see. People make judgments on your character and personality based on photos and posts, some of those things are fabricated lies rather than the truth too. Now if someone wants to get to know me, and I them, we both have to work at it. This is good for me with women too, as I often would be interested in someone but be turned off by some small detail I found on their Facebook/Instagram, now that FB is gone, I have to get to know a woman before I make up my mind on whether they'd be a good mate.

Overall the most important positive outcome for me in removing myself from FB, Insta, Snapchat, etc. is that there is a massive reduction in my exposure to negative/provocative stimuli. I have more control over the stimuli that cause a neurological trigger, and it has given me much greater control on my NoFap journey, almost at the day 60 and really proud of myself for getting here. I hope to never PM ever again.
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Amen brother.
 
Mankrik said:
I like this topic. People my age all live on social media
...
but I feel like it's a serious problem that is hurting my generation and is making permanent mental and behavioral changes in people that reduces the quality of social interaction.
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Yeah man, I agree! I think it's changing the way we socialise and communicate, and I don't think it's a positive change. For sure there are lots of benefits to social media, one of my best mates got an excellent career out of his network, but I think the cons definitely outweigh the pros in terms of mental health, social comparison and self-esteem.

Glad there are others out there that think like me!
 
Yeah, I've done this as well and I've gotta say I feel a hell of a lot better these days. I also don't find myself being angry for no reason (well, reasons, but avoidable reasons). It's just better to live in the real world and focus on yourself and those around you who matter most.
 
We should use social media, and not be used by social media. If your consumption is becoming an obsession, take it away!
 
The Hero said:
Well done ! , i also deleted FB , Insta and Twitter 3 months ago and it really helped me to control my emotions and reduce stress , envy and depression.
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I've had the same thing, although I admit it took me a couple months to start to see the benefits because I was anxious of missing out on things like events or messages from friends I made overseas. I wish I planned my exit a little better, to get some email addresses. Glad to hear that it's helped you like it has helped me :)

CowardlyLion said:
Yeah, I've done this as well and I've gotta say I feel a hell of a lot better these days. I also don't find myself being angry for no reason (well, reasons, but avoidable reasons). It's just better to live in the real world and focus on yourself and those around you who matter most.
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I totally agree with you, I would feel a sense of frustration and anger over my life because I didn't feel like it weighed up to my friends lives. Now that I don't have that constant comparison, I feel like my emotions are so much more real. Now if I am angry about something, it's probably something important that needs attention, rather than being annoyed that my photo didn't get the attention I wished, or that all my friends seem to be in the happiest relationships while I'm floundering around in the single life (most of them, it's just an act for their friends). It has given me perspective, and it's only recently that I have noticed, now that I don't care as much about what people think, that life is fricken sweet when you're living for what you enjoy and not for what you think others will accept of you. If that makes sense...
 
Dave_29 said:
how about WhatsApp app??
does it count with social media that increase sex drive?
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Personally, I don't think so, for me WhatsApp is a platform for chat, just like sending a text message. There's no newsfeed, or any rubbish that pops up, I use WhatsApp for communicating with my family and flatmates. But If it were a point of temptation for me or triggered me in any way, I have no doubt in my mind that I would delete it asap. I guess it's personal to whoever uses it, I'm sure there are people out there that aren't affected by instagram, but for me it has a huge impact
 
Kdot said:
I didn't delete mine yet but I will one day or just stop getting on it
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I found it very helpful to delete my account, even though I still check out twitter via the mobile site. Every time I wanna like, retweet, or reply to a tweet, it's a reminder that thanks to PMO, I can't. So twitter went from being a source for PMO to a reminder to stay clean. :P
 
Great post. I have been off of social media for 5 years now and everyone thinks its so alien and odd that i dont have a facebook, or other modes of social media. Truthfully I dont mind living as a ghost.
The reason i took myself off was that i was tired of seeing way too many people being fake. Pretending that things were just ok when in reality that picture of that happy family is in absolute disarray in real life. I never had an image to portray I was always just me. Plus the trolls and how cruel people are to each other not to mention the cyber bullying. Hats off to the teenagers growing up with this crap now days. In my days we stood up to bullys by knocking them right on their ass. Now they hide behind computers.
In short id much rather be aware of whats going on around me rather than sitting with my face stuck inside my phone trying to find ways to please my internet image.
We are all much better without it.
 
Flimsyfryingpan said:
Great post. I have been off of social media for 5 years now and everyone thinks its so alien and odd that i dont have a facebook, or other modes of social media. Truthfully I dont mind living as a ghost.
The reason i took myself off was that i was tired of seeing way too many people being fake. Pretending that things were just ok when in reality that picture of that happy family is in absolute disarray in real life. I never had an image to portray I was always just me. Plus the trolls and how cruel people are to each other not to mention the cyber bullying. Hats off to the teenagers growing up with this crap now days. In my days we stood up to bullys by knocking them right on their ass. Now they hide behind computers.
In short id much rather be aware of whats going on around me rather than sitting with my face stuck inside my phone trying to find ways to please my internet image.
We are all much better without it.
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Yeah man, I agree. I've only been off 6 months, but I felt really strange that I was taking part in something that I knew was destructive to so many people. And myself, I had been on social media since I was 13, creating a fake identity through my formative years, It's a total trap of the ego, everyone knows it's bad, but it's so hard to let go! So glad I let go...
 
It's great stuff. I think it's really commendable of you for quitting social media. Simply because there are more benefits from being off it.

It's hard for the first week or so with withdrawal symptoms. But it soon becomes normality and the positive impacts from staying off Facebook/Twitter/Instagram/Snapchat comes with more mental clarity. You can be yourself more of the time. Be comfortable in your own skin and live your life for you. Not for social media interested in getting likes, shares, etc. Wasting time and effort impressing those you either don't know or like. It also helps put things into perspective -- especially when there's less or no more comparisons.

If there's anything to go by it, social media can bring out the worst of people. It's a popularity contest and a narcissistic minefield. One thing that many avid and passive users on social media, with smartphones glued to their hands, is that they overlook the importance of privacy. Ironically, they'll complain that too many nosy people know about their lives, etc. That's one perk of being off social media. The mystery that surrounds me. If people really want to know about me, then they'll have to make the effort -- as I will myself. From being off social media, I learnt on who are my real friends.

For me, quitting social media helped my progress of recovery from quitting PMO. As some have mentioned on here, it can cause triggers leading to relapses. Instagram is possibly the worst offender in my opinion for this. But rather like PMO, social media can be a time waster that can lead to procrastination, depression, anxiety and other mental health problems.

So yeah, quitting social media is one of the best things I've done this year prior to NoFap. From the benefits of quitting, I've laid down the foundations for me and my life. Striving for growth and improvement, in making me a better person. To good life and good health.
 
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Jharpeskie said:
Social media was one of those things that I thought was necessary to modern life. The thought of deleting my network was inconvenient and all a bit too scary. Now having been free from all social media for 5 months I feel like a free man! Here is how it has helped me with Nofap:

- Instagram babes: This was a big trap for me, not only are there instagram models that are absolute inhumanly attractive, but some of my friends post provocative photos that trigger my sexual drive. Now, It's just not there for me, there is no mega-insta-babe temptations! I'm free from the early morning browse.

- Random posts: From time to time on Facebook I would get random provocative posts come across my wall, the worst were pornographic videos, the mildest, similar to instagram, were the babes!

- Loneliness & FOMO: The way I experience loneliness has changed, no longer do I see a billion photos of happy couples, or friends having the best time together, no longer am I invited to events that I can't make. And because I don't see these things, I don't feel like I'm missing out on them. It's helped my social anxiety a lot.

- Friends: I know who my real friends are now, because they're the people I want to intentionally communicate with and also, the ones who intentionally seek to communicate with me. This has also highlighted that I need to work on my relationships a bit more, which I wouldn't have realised had I continued with Facebook.

- Authenticity: I'm no longer trying to portray a public image and that gives me the freedom to be authentic to myself and those around me - rather than curating a profile for others to see. People make judgments on your character and personality based on photos and posts, some of those things are fabricated lies rather than the truth too. Now if someone wants to get to know me, and I them, we both have to work at it. This is good for me with women too, as I often would be interested in someone but be turned off by some small detail I found on their Facebook/Instagram, now that FB is gone, I have to get to know a woman before I make up my mind on whether they'd be a good mate.

Overall the most important positive outcome for me in removing myself from FB, Insta, Snapchat, etc. is that there is a massive reduction in my exposure to negative/provocative stimuli. I have more control over the stimuli that cause a neurological trigger, and it has given me much greater control on my NoFap journey, almost at the day 60 and really proud of myself for getting here. I hope to never PM ever again.
Click to expand...
Awesome, I chose to do the same thing this week... I been trying to quit this for some years now... Ive gotten off social media before in the past... After reading this and other info on nofap im definitely sticking to it this time because it is a trigger for me personally... I would get free from pmo for a while and go right back... I just joined nofap this week... I wish I would have found out about this along time ago... Hope the best for you my friend!!!
 
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