How do I get out and meet girls?

I'm sure one will catch your eye at the store or sumthin. Just approach her man you probably have lots to offer a girl

 

It seems you have not yet discovered "daygame". It's basically approaching women outside of clubs or any other super-intentional "social" events. So yeah there are plenty of women on the street , stores, parks, moon etc. You just have to approach them and try to form a connection. It's easy to say, I've been doing it for like 10 days and still haven't even approached yet haha have social anxiety when it comes to that. But I keep trying atleast + Recent relapses made me even less confident. I have a sweet torrent which you might find interesting PM me if you are interested.

 

You play instruments...how about an open mic night? Or a music club (club as in group of people with similar interests, not nightclub)? Or a camping club? Point is, you have to find situations where (a) you feel comfortable; and (b) there are women you might be interested in who have similar interests to yours.

 

What some call day game others call street harrassment. You have to be a pretty top do not to annoy people doing it.

Also I've seen lists of where people meet their mates. Friends, work, school, social activities, dating websites seems to be getting there, even bars are at about 10%. I don't ever remember random street encounter making the list.

If you are at school, join something, if you arn't dating you should have time to join many things. Try to do electives if your major is a sausage party. Network through friends.

The things I would have done differently. It gets much harder once you are out of school.

I sort of knew this girl. Short and very pretty little redhead. She had a co-op half way across the country in this office with only middle aged women and she being in her mid 20's had nothing in common with them. She described her 4 months in that city [of 2 million people] as being very lonely. However at school things were fine.

So do something now.


And make sure it is something you like as Limeaid says, otherwise it will show.


However I would add, don't be afraid to try something different. If you don't like it you don't have to go back and you never know. I don't like poetry but I went to this gig and it was alright. Still not a huge fan but spoken word made it better and the room had a cool vibe. I also got a chance to experience what it is like being a racial minority being the only white dude there which was kind of awesome in an interesting way. [Very friendly bunch BTW]


Even if you don't get the girl, you might find new shit and if you find a club you mesh with you might have an extra section on your resume so you can imply that you are more socially adjusted fellow than the next guy.

 

I think meeting women is somewhere around step 52 on the yellow brick road of becoming more sociable.

You've got to get out and just do stuff. Find certain places you like and keep showing up there. Talk to people - not primarily women. Talk to men, establish relationships. Don't push them but allow them to grow on their own.

For example, for the longest time I've gone to the same Gold's Gym. I go there 3 or 4 days a week. I go there with my headphones on and listen to music the whole time. PEOPLE HAVE TO APPROACH ME. Do you know why? What if I'm using something they want to use? "Excuse me sir, how many sets do you have left here?" "Sir, are you using this weight right here?". That is just by being present. Now, I'm good at what I do, so people have approached me and asked me about how to dead lift or how to squat.

Just yesterday I went to the gym and as I was walking in I saw a guy who approached me for deadlift advice. I asked him how he was doing, how is training was going and so on... then he invited me to work out with him and his friends in the mornings. So if I ever want to do that, I'll meet more people and make more friends, and probably develop relationships that extend outside of the gym.

There are lots of women who work out. I'm friends with one who asked me to spot her on bench press. All you have to do is complement a person and then they want to talk to you.

Meeting people happens exponentially. If you only have two acquaintances at a given place, as long as you just make conversations with them those two will become 4. The 4 will become 16 and those 2 acquaintances become your friends. If you have upstanding moral character - even if they are all men - they will start giving you women. I'm serious. Someone has a sister, man, and he wants her to date a good. Guy.

Just relax, get out, meet people without discretion, get established socially, and women will enter your life. You have to be patient and let it happen.

 

Girls generally act like I'm ;
A. mental patient or
B.the vampire

I swear I dont find myself that attractive maybe 3out of 4 so I talk to cute girls like their out of my league, and i think they like the way I'm not all on the prowl because most flirt subtly. I always carry myself like fuck the world because i dont owe it anything, and i think chicks are into that.

Bottom line brah is that you have everything you need to make a lady happy. Also know who is the girl you want not the one you think you want

 

I've been going to many gyms for ages... decades. I met one guy who a broed out for a tiny bit. A few people who I see who I have short chats with at the gym. Never extend to anything more though.

There is an employee who after about 10 years we started hanging out so I guess that coutns for something but that involved me reaching out in a very difficult and personal way and her being an absolute saint. I guess 25 years in and out of gyms I finally struck gold.


I've done many other things and aside from roleplaying games, I've made bare aqueantences that never expanded exponetially, and never to the point of being hooked up to any single females. Although again there is some slight hope for that gym thing... after decades.


However he does make a point. If you are somewhat normal and adjusted and can just talk to people it is the way to go.

 

If you want to meet girls in the real world you have to go where the girls are. Sorry to break it to you but they aren't just going to walk up to you and hit on you (not very often at least).

People talk lowly of bars/clubs but those are great training grounds. It's a densely packed environment filled with beautiful women, if one doesn't like you, move onto another one that catches your eye. If you don't like to drink, then don't drink. Talking to women during the day is tougher to do, but really good in my opinion. I've met a bunch of girls in the past- on the bus, in a coffee shop, on an escalator at the mall etc.. They're caught off guard and really appreciate the balls that it takes, especially in this ever-increasing online culture.

There's great online options/tinder etc.. but being on NoFap I would suggest getting away from the electronics and into a real social environment as often as possible to work on those ever important social skills.

Just like was suggested before, do an open mic night, play with a band. These are huge attraction builders being up there in front of a crowd expressing yourself.

Going camping and being interested in that is fine, for yourself and your friends. Except for maybe inviting along some friends, and they bring along female friends I don't see how the whole camping thing to meet women is going to work. It'd be pretty weird to invite a girl you just met to go camping if she doesn't know you.

Basically, play into your strengths, get into a social environment, get social and experiment.

Good luck!

 

^^ +100 to TimmyTwoShoes whole post.

And that is the biggest takeaway.

Other than that, just socialize (offline) and build up from there.

 

If you can play several instruments, why not approach girls with an acoustic guitar and tell them you want to sing them a song? I've seen youtube videos of guys doing this and seems to work well.

 

I'm the last person who should give advice when it comes to women, Naikolai. But the one thing I'll say is this: you're NOT going to learn how to pick up women by reading on a forum. You learn it by going out there and failing! It takes a lot of balls and courage to put yourself out there and fail time after time before you start getting a knack for it. People that attempt to describe the minutiae of "game" are mostly bullshitters that have no video proof of what they say. Be confident. Be cool. Understand that you're going to feel self-conscious and embarassed. But remember to enjoy yourself and have fun. If the girl is smiling then push forward. If you are having fun in the conversation it will reverberate to the woman

 

I knew a guy who tried to learn from the net. Although he was reading good stuff he was still completely clueless. For example it is one thing to read about body language and signals but he ended up creeping people out because he was still blind to it. I saw him in action once and it was so obvious to anyone with a clue that the girl was trying to get him to go away and he refused to believe me when I pointed out that one word grunts and looking away meant sod off ya silly git. However he considered me negative and his equally clueless friend was all way to go bud!.

Sad to say but if you are socially clueless and awkward as opposed to just a shy guy who has a lot of awesome in, you are going to alienate a lot of girls. Also a lot of experts go on about how you can learn from your failures but that is total bovine manure. 1: It isn't always easy to figure out what if anything you did wrong. 2: She sure as hell ain't going to tell you. 3: She might not even know. I've asked people I know what is wrong with me. Often they don't know or if they have advice it varies completely from person to person [and that is another issue, pulling a girls hair and calling her a slut has actually been known to work, different people]. I find that the advice that I have gotten contradicts other people's advice.
Another story. I've heard from a few neckbeards that my problem was I tended to get vulgar. I was at a work place where I was on my best behaviour and I because the social punching bag, the alpha male would act the way I did, he had two girls fighting tooth and nail over him and a third girl well in the bathroom etc...within 4 weeks. He wasn't all that hot either.

I am not saying don't meet people. However normals have no idea how difficult it is for the freaks of the world to figure it out. It's been 20 years for me, I started in my mid 20's.