How do I learn to give a damn again?

DrRobotronic · Feb 15, 2016

After yet another relapse, I realized something must be true. I don't seem to give a damn. If I did, I wouldn't relapse over and over with little to no sign of improvement. I've been doing NoFap long enough that I should just know what to do and why I want to do it, but I not sure if that's the case anymore.

I have also realized this extends beyond NoFap, I don't seem to care about school much more than a pass-fail attitude, and even then that's not always the case. I've stopped seeing the value in it and found it difficult to focus during the rare lectures we do have.

That's not to say there aren't some things I still enjoy, I'm currently doing two part-time internships which I find much more engaging than school, and going to the gym I often find rewarding as well, although I'm finding I'm not making it out as often as I'd like the past few weeks.

But overall, I find myself wondering more why I should care and finding myself unable to come up with an answer most of the time. I know I'm not particularly happy or productive like this, but I'm not sure what to do about it when I don't know why.

Sorry for the dose of negativity, but if I feel like if I don't re-discover the why of doing the things I used to care about, I'll just continue drifting along.

TakingTheSteps · Feb 15, 2016

Keep searching and asking for those "whys." That's never a bad thing to pursue in life. Why is such an epic question. I certainly don't have all the answers for you, but I know they are out there to be found, if you earnestly seek them. It just might take more time than you are hoping.

On the PMO front, though, I would recommend hanging out here for a while --> http://www.nofap.com/forum/index.ph...e-what-is-your-driving-force-to-change.53012/. Great thread, a lot of great purpose there. Maybe consider sitting down and making your own list of reasons, and search your heart for your purpose in getting rid of PMO. When my APs are having trouble and falling back into a cycle of PMO, I always ask them why they want to get rid of PMO. And when they answer, I ask, "So why isn't that enough?" Because if the pattern is returning, then that is a good indication that your reasons aren't strong enough right now, so maybe you need to find some stronger ones.

Don't let this discourage you, though. It's just life -- constant reassessing and change and growth. It's a good thing, and the fact that you're seeking growth instead of being content with your disinterest in certain things, like school. You're improving yourself! That's a great thing!

R92B · Feb 16, 2016

In moments like you're in, I always try to refresh my mind and rediscover how PMO is negatively affecting me. Reading a tonne of evidence on social anxiety/depression/confidence with crazy success stories really makes me envious and aspire to be where they are. Why can't I date three chicks a week? Why can't I boss life? It's about no longer being content with being a victim, but sometimes you need to fall even lower to see the light.

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How do I learn to give a damn again?

DrRobotronic Fapstronaut

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