How I went from "forever alone" to having an amazing romantic experience in Europe

Green Monstah · Feb 8, 2018

Code Hero said: ↑

This is an amazing post. I'm so glad it didn't end with you having sex, but instead having a genuine human connection with someone. It really shows hope. For all of us struggling with balancing our lives, with making PMO go away, with not focusing only on the O, this post clarifies the best in people.

I'm going abroad in 7 months. I've relapsed recently, but am in to a new streak that will go longer. I hope to share a story of connection and hope as beautiful as this.

Thank you.
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I am convinced we would have made love that night. It's just that I was still recovering from a severe PIED so I didn't even bother attempting to bring her back to my place. (My erections are amazing these days, but I digress....) There was just no way it was going to happen if certain things (pun intended) weren't in order. That said, there is literally nothing I would want to do different in those 12 hours. It was a perfect day. It was romantic and it was special.

Bro going abroad long-term is one of the things I really wish I have done. Have a great time! I guarantee you can make it happen. DO NOT feel afraid of saying "hello". I don't do stupid pickup lines but "Excuse me, could you takr my pic?" worked really well for me.

I hope you can experience something similar! I swear a week before this hapoened, I had no idea I had it in me to make something like this happen. Have a great time and good luck!

sectumsempra · Feb 10, 2018

tidus said: ↑

If this story was a movie, I'd buy it on Blu-Ray.

In all seriousness, so stoked for you! What an incredible experience not many people get to encounter.
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You should definitely watch the Before Trilogy. Before Sunrise, Before Sunset and Before Midnight. In fact the story sounds so similar to Before Sunrise's, you'll think its copied.

Green Monstah · Feb 25, 2018

sectumsempra said: ↑

You should definitely watch the Before Trilogy. Before Sunrise, Before Sunset and Before Midnight. In fact the story sounds so similar to Before Sunrise's, you'll think its copied.
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I've been hearing about these movies! I'll have to check them out. Thank you!!!

noonoon · Mar 5, 2018

donmeshwime said: ↑

Hey man, I have a problem with negative thinking too and I'm having quite a tough time.

Could you please share your tactics to deal with it?
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I’m not in on this conversation but I have the same trouble. What I do now is to look at this type of “fantasy thinking” just as I look at lust thinking. When I have lustful thoughts I say no to them. I tell myself no and that I don’t have the right to think these thoughts. Negative imaginary thinking is a very similar addiction to pmo (I rather think of them as two sides of the same coin). I now treat these thoughts just like I treat lust fantasy,

paradigmshifter · Mar 7, 2018

This is so good. I have a lot of time off and have been thinking about travelling abroad alone for quite a while now. I think it would be a great idea and life development lesson, but I lack the confidence to do it

bobby_100 · Mar 8, 2018

y

Green Monstah said: ↑

This builds on a previous thread I have written here, but I think it is worthy of a thread of its own. Long story short, it was only a few months ago where I was a heavy PMO addict (late night and/or early morning addict). I felt like I was going to be “forever alone” and I would say FALSE things like “She is too good for me. She is a 10, and I am a 2”. I have journeyed a long long way since. If you want to know more about my back-story, I highly recommend you check out one of my previous posts here: My Take On “You’ll Develop Super Powers With Women”

This is by far the happiest post I have had to write here, and I had no idea I would ever be writing something like this… at least not anytime soon. I know this is a long read, but I have no doubt that this story (and backstory in my old post) can help a lot of you!

I went on a Eurotrip on my own. One day when visiting a tourist attraction where I noticed a very beautiful lady. She looked like she too was traveling alone. I thought “Wow, I wish I could meet her. Maybe… just… MAYBE!!!” I knew right away if I didn’t at least say “hello”, then definitely nothing good will happen. What started off as an “Excuse me, could you please take a photo of me… would you like me to return the favor?” quickly turned into a conversation, and we introduced ourselves. We were both alone, so we both ended up exploring the place together. We got to know each other and quickly formed a bond. We even started taking selfies together.

We got done with the place around lunchtime. I asked her if she wanted to get a beer with me. We walked the narrow streets looking for place to eat. The drivers were crazy in this town so I stuck my arm out in front of her to keep her safe if she was about to cross. I even grabbed her hand a few times. She didn’t mind! A few more moments of those, she ended up wrapping her arm around mine and held on tightly. We walked all around town like that. Here’s a tip fellas, always remember to protect and cherish our women!

Lunch/beer was amazing. We bonded, having heart-to-heart conversations. It was wonderful. She was a complete sweetheart! We lost track of time and stayed there for a long time. After that, we took a train to another place. She shared some music with me on her mp3 player. We got off a stop as a slow song came on. I put one of the earbuds on her, and one on me. I grabbed her hand, pulled her close, and we slow-danced right there in the middle of the train station. I spun her around, she loved it. We kissed after the song ended. I don’t know how I did this successfully (from getting her to dance with me to the kiss), but I was 100% sure she was NOT going to reject me. Sometimes you have to take a leap of faith. We ended up in a park, where we stayed for hours. From more dancing, laying/rolling around in the grass, and running around chasing each other. I told her how beautiful she was. She also told me she thought I was beautiful!!! We attempted find a place to go dancing, but couldn’t find any. However, there was a guy singing while playing an acoustic guitar at a square. It was good enough for us! I took her in my arms right there and we danced for so many songs. We walked to get dinner. Some hooligans were yelling at us, offering drugs and stuff… I just pulled her closer, held her tighter, and kept walking. She was amazed by that, called me a real gentleman, just unlike any guy she ever met. I loved protecting her! Honestly, on my end, I felt very safe when I was with her too.

We got dinner and we ended up starring at each other a lot. We knew that the night was coming to an end, and she had to fly out super early the next morning. She said, because of the distance, can we agree that we don’t know what can happen in the long-term? She said she wanted to be friends. I usually HATE the words “I just want to be friends”, only because I have been hurt by girls who said that, and those girls turned out to NOT be true friends at all, but I digress… as for the European lady, I totally understood the context she said it in. She’s not coming to USA anytime soon, and I don’t know when I will be in her area anytime soon. It wouldn’t be fair to make either of us wait for the other, while we are still trying to figure our own lives out. Life isn’t fair, but at least we had one of the most romantic memories ever. I will forever cherish this moment. I do know that we have a beautiful friendship going! We will keep in touch. Sure we connected on Facebook, and we also traded home addresses. I want to send her a postcard to thank her for a wonderful day. Btw, we have been talking just about every day since I got home!

So I walked her back to her place. She was flying out early the next morning, would have loved to spend at least another day with her. I put on a slow song on my phone and we shared a last dance in the square. After that, we just couldn’t let go of each other. Didn’t check, but I’m sure we were there for at least 20 minutes. We just stared into each other’s eyes. She said she loved my eyes. I love her eyes too. We kissed, hugged tightly, and stared at each other for what felt like an eternity. She assured me “It’s not goodbye, just see you later.” Maybe we can meet somewhere again in the summer! I know the idea of an American guy and a beautiful European lady falling in love in such short time can be like a fairy tale, but for those 12 hours, we made it work. This is not one of those “European girls are easy” stories. It wasn’t like I made out with a complete stranger at a nightclub within 1 minute. We really did get to know each other, we had heart-to-hearts. I’m telling you, I’d much rather get into a lady’s heart than into her pants. I gave her mine too. Btw I have given my heart too easily to so many of the wrong ladies in the past. I have been careful since. I don’t want to fall too hard, but I swear the European lady and I have made a legit connection in those 12 hours we had.

----------------------------

I did this without a stupid/dirty pickup line. I did this without calling her a degrading name. For a little while, I browsed for books on how to meet women; and I never bought or read a single one. I search out "pickup artists", many have been proven to be fake, didn't need that bs! I was able to be myself. I am in disbelief (only cause it felt like it was a dream), but I am proof that I can be the perfect gentleman for the right lady who will appreciate it!

I have no doubt that this has been a benefit of NoFap. I started NoFap in November 2016, and in the months that followed. Yes, I have relapsed many times, I have never made it past Day 49. The 40’s have always somehow been my cursed range. Today is Day 47 of Attempt #9, but urges are low! Yes, I’m positive that it’s due to a certain amazing day I had.

There have been many noticeable benefits all the same! Most noteworthy, I have been doing a whole lot better with women. I have been making it a point to talk to them more, meet them, etc. I can also make them laugh, I never knew until now, but yes, I can be a funny guy! My mind has just been a whole lot clearer. I still don’t consider as “improving” with women, but rather unlocking the full and true potential with women that I had all along! Literally a few months ago, if I saw the European lady, I bet I would have just thought dirty thoughts about her, and then think poorly of myself such as “why couldn’t I find someone like her?” Looking back, I cannot believe that there was a time when I said the words “I’m not good enough for her. She is a 10, and I am a 2”. No one will EVER hear me say those words again. I came a long way from that bullshit. When I told the European lady beautiful she was, she also said I was beautiful!!! My heart melted, for the longest time, I (WRONGLY) believed I would never have that effect on a lady… I am freeing my mind, every day, getting better and better. I am “developing super powers with women”! You all can too! =]

Another side note, NoFap challenge has gotten me into exercising like crazy. I have been swimming, lifting a lot. Even on the days when I “don’t have time to go to the gym”, I would do 100 pushups, even if it was in my room. I got great results with that. I caught ladies looking at me. The lady in Europe… ohhh she felt up my arms bigly!

I have already mentioned that I have relapsed multiple times, and I still have work to do. I definitely am thankful for the Panic Button. I have saved many of the motivational things it has led me to. Most notable would be this video. I would say this even played a part in motivating me in meeting women, and ultimately saying “hello” to that beautiful European lady. I’m surprised this video isn’t more viral. There is an important life lesson from here.

“Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.”

TIPS:
1) Believe in yourself. You are more than what you have become
2) Be yourself; it’s the easiest thing you can do. I cannot stress this enough, but it’s not about “improving” with women as much as it is about unlocking the true and full potential you had with women all along.
3) Do the work. Be confident. If you want to say “hello”, do it. The only thing worse than getting rejected is if you do nothing, which will guarantee nothing will happen.
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your post is quite long i will read it laterhowever i got the idea then you might be of the guys who can help me leave faping and get intot the real world even been in monogamous relationship

Rey Rey · Mar 8, 2018

This was a really nice read so touching and uplifting I would say soul nourishing and there is a lesson as well. Really glad to have come across this

bobby_100 · Mar 8, 2018

Rey Rey said: ↑

This was a really nice read so touching and uplifting I would say soul nourishing and there is a lesson as well. Really glad to have come across this
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yeah i guess thats nice

Turkish Delight · Sep 29, 2018

Thank you so much for writing this post! I am a forever alone too and I feel better just reading this. Yesterday night I dreamed about your experience exactly as you wrote it and I woke up this morning feeling energized. I did my best street workout in a long time.

Keep up the good work! Just reading your amazing story and seeing 121 days on your counter motivates me to abstain from PMO

Green Monstah · Sep 30, 2018

Turkish Delight said: ↑

Thank you so much for writing this post! I am a forever alone too and I feel better just reading this. Yesterday night I dreamed about your experience exactly as you wrote it and I woke up this morning feeling energized. I did my best street workout in a long time.

Keep up the good work! Just reading your amazing story and seeing 121 days on your counter motivates me to abstain from PMO
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Read my lips. You will NOT always be forever alone. It took me a year to really get back into the dating game, and I'm just getting warmed up. I still have a lot of work to do. You can totally get into the game if you want to and if you work on it! I wish you the best in your journey! YOU CAN DO IT!

PS Did you dream a story before you read this? You know, there was a time I dreamed a story like this too! I just never thought it would happen to me! Literally the day before this happened, I saw so many couples and I felt like "Maybe one day..." And just like that I was thinking "Wow, if this is a dream, please don't wake up!"

Turkish Delight · Sep 30, 2018

Green Monstah said: ↑

Read my lips. You will NOT always be forever alone. It took me a year to really get back into the dating game, and I'm just getting warmed up. I still have a lot of work to do. You can totally get into the game if you want to and if you work on it! I wish you the best in your journey! YOU CAN DO IT!

PS Did you dream a story before you read this? You know, there was a time I dreamed a story like this too! I just never thought it would happen to me! Literally the day before this happened, I saw so many couples and I felt like "Maybe one day..." And just like that I was thinking "Wow, if this is a dream, please don't wake up!"
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No I only had dirty sexual dreams. This was the first time I dreamed about an actual romantic relationship and it felt good.

whatrichme · Oct 2, 2018

Green Monstah said: ↑

A little tip. You see a lady you fancy, say hello, and see where it leads. Whatever happens next likely will not be what you had in mind, but saying "hello" is a great start, and after that, every lady you say "hello" and start a conversation with, it WILL get better. You will start believing in yourself more and more with each "hello" and conversation starters.

Go do it bro!
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Inspired by your post:

Was on my way out for lunch, a lady rushed out as the elevator doors opened on my floor,
she quickly backed up while looking/feeling silly, I gave a quick glimpse and said "Hello" and she returned a great smile.
(and a few more stare from my back)

She wasn't my type, but if saying hello doesn't get you anywhere, you give a great vibe for the day.

I am getting back into dating too, let's see where the "Hellos" takes me to.

Writing this on my 200th+ day. Cheers.

Green Monstah · Jun 10, 2023

sectumsempra said: ↑

You should definitely watch the Before Trilogy. Before Sunrise, Before Sunset and Before Midnight. In fact the story sounds so similar to Before Sunrise's, you'll think its copied.
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Hey, I know it has been a while. I felt the urge to come back here and re-read my post and its comments. I am doing better than before (in more ways than one), but when it comes to dating, I have been a very out of practice lately. I came back here to remind myself of what could be possible if I am willing to do the work and go after what I want.

I just wanna say thank you for recommending those movies! I finally got around to watching all of them.

For me the first one is my story. We never met up again after that one day. Simoly put,, life happened. I had my job and grad school in US, while she was doing a work-study in Europe.

We did flirt with the idea of meeting up somewhere, but it was just not possible. Eventually I had a gf, and then she got a bf... we agreed that if either of us is in a relationship, it's not a good idea if we talk to each other because we do still have a flame for each other.

Anyways, the first movie is definitely my story. The ending put me at peace with the fact that this was a one-day deal and we will likely never meet again. If that wonderful day is all we have, then so be it.. Honestly the other two did as well. They are a case of "what if they did stay together?"

Anyways, thanks again. I love those movies. Made me laugh and cry all at the same time.

Hope you are doing well!

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How I went from "forever alone" to having an amazing romantic experience in Europe

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