How important is getting your own place when in comes to getting laid?

Even though I want to get laid I only use that as a stepping stone to building inner strength. Not only some independence from parents important but also independence from women is vital. I have two beautiful women who are in contact with me but I think I might just leave them go cause I know all my love is inside.

 

My story with my abusive parents are complicated, however to recite my story in brief I was forced to leave at age 20. The rent and bills in Sydney are as expensive as hell, keeps going up and up along with rest of the cost of living. This city has risen to glory as being one of the most expensive cities in the world. So I've never been able to afford renting my own place because even the average earning single-income (AU$700 to $1000 per week) can barely afford it, and women here don't go for relationships with you unless you have your own house. So yeah, we gotta share with roommates and split the bills or else you'll end up killing yourself. No privacy to spend time with women unless you can afford a hotel room. Don't ask me how much that will cost you per night in Sydney. It's even expensive for celebrities and that's why they don't come here; as soon as one of them do, they leave.

A handful of nice Australian couples (boyfriend/girlfriend relationships) split the bills but they start complaining that they cannot afford children. Some try to move near the cheaper countryside wherever possible but that means longer drive hours to work. However, the majority of women, as we all know, cannot be expected to help you out with the bills even though we do propagate the prevalent notion of equality. Feminist propaganda is serious business here but it's merely a covering for the fact that women here never pay for the dinner, forget helping me with the rent or bills. I don't mean to sidetrack, but I can totally agree with you that PMO is a cowardly escape from responsibility. PMO is an escape from real life and from being a real man who is expected to cover the costs for his prospective growing family.

In the real world we struggle to pay the bills and keep up with the latest trends, unless you are lucky enough to be living with your parents and don't have to pay rent; so, yeah. So women, who stay single and unwanted (also un-spoiled by anybody taking them out) for longer, turn to employment and love to work in the entertainment industry who can afford to shower them in money and gifts that we cannot afford doing so when we have to pay rent and bills, or the mortgage and the bills in buying a house to simply put a roof over their heads.

 

In my case it's probably import

Any way for you to leave the country or find a source of location-independent income?

 

I'm not going to bother, I've lost interest in women and I'm focussed on my studies. My God is science, not women. However, I have already thought of that idea for a long time when I finish my studies so I can work elsewhere in the world where the living standards aren't so high nor are the taxes or the expenses. Many graduates leave Australia to work (usually in Asia, Middle East or USA) where they'll be appreciated more and pressured less by financial stress.

 

Bro, nothing necessarily wrong with wanting these things, but ask yourself why. What are the emotional reasons behind wanting these things? Just follow your passions in life and the right woman will show up at the right time.

If you want this lifestyle just because you think it'll look good to women, then something is wrong. Going to a bar is one of the worst places you can meet women. A lot of women at bars and clubs are idiots. You can meet them anywhere. Grocery, gym, library. There are hundreds of places.

 

I work as a security surveillance supervisor.

(Boring job. Always watching people wandering around like zombies.)

You should be working as an actor (primary or secondary roles) then. Even high-paying jobs aren't good enough for many of the pretty princesses out there. For some even a king is not good enough for them.

 

Women want men with drive and ambition. Definitely move out of your parents house. Were you going to University or something is that why? You mentioned student loans. Why is it that you only have a minimum wage job? Is it lack of drive and ambition? I think you need to up your game and start being more mature and responsible. Girls want guys who have their shit together.

 

I think this is not the case with every country.In my place it is a common thing that Everyone live as a family together.Parents and their kids.Even if their kids are workers they still live together and then marry someone.Moving out after marriage is optional.If they want to stay in home they can or else build one new home and shift to there.Moreover the society and culture is a lot different.I think its not much sexualized like that of Western Countries.We are born in such a society.So we dont experience such a lack of freedom in living with parents.Also Its rare people having sex before legal marriage.The society see them as bad people.

 

I had a stable job as a high school teacher and didn't move out of the house until I was 25. Biggest mistake I made was not moving out sooner -- I kinda felt like I was in high school again actually! I felt emasculated and very immature even compared with some of my students who graduated and were already working two jobs. it was also very restricting subconsciously considering I had already been living away from home for the better part of 8 years.

Next to discovering NoFap, moving out was the single biggest thing that drove me to breaking out of the cycle of isolation, anxiety, and depression that I had and actually helped me to move to a new city and start a new life for myself.
Also, needless to say that was when I started taking chances with women because I didn't have to worry about my mom getting up in my business about it. Plus, moving out motivated me to handle my financial priorities rather than blowing money on useless crap. In three weeks, I will have paid my school loans off and be debt-free.

As far as eating out...really? Learn to cook, man. Get used to buying groceries on the regular and start by making simple meals. Eating out is a huge waste of money (albeit one I'm guilty of as well). Make it a reward for yourself mid-week or the weekend. See if you can't learn recipes from your parents or your friends.

I personally struggle with loneliness being on my own (especially when it comes to PMO urges), but that tends to happen if you're broke and working like crazy. I'd suggest getting a roommate so that way you can cut down on costs...AND cut down on the PMO as you reboot. You'll also have some social interaction with at least one other person not from work during the day.

 

In my opinion, those girls aren't worth your time. high maintenance gold diggers (males too) are alot like the addicts here --always seeking for more to pamper their unrealistic fantasies and never content with what they have.

My feeling is you don't need status or money, but you do need wealth -- that is, a lifestyle of abundance which naturally breeds confidence and contentment with yourself and leads you to new experiences. If there's two thing women hate, it's 1) lack of confidence, 2) being bored. One I think pretty much everyone here knows, but 2 was a little bit of a revelation for me a few years ago. Most women want a man who won't be boring and dull, even when they're married. If you're living a life that puts you at peace with yourself and allows for diverse experiences, women will take notice and naturally gravitate towards you.

I've realized that kind of lifestyle -- true wealth which attracts the women you desire -- doesn't take all the money in the world. It does, however, require you to do some soul-searching and figure out what type of life you want to lead then going to create the conditions that allow for all of those parameters.

 

I have no idea how I'll ever be able to afford my own place within the next 5 years. I'm afraid that by the time I can afford to do the things I want to I'll be too old.

 

Bro, i was a virgin till my twentyfirst, had no clue how to talk to women, so i decided to go talk to them on streets, bars, cafes nightclubs etc... This helped me alot with self confidence and got me laid with 3 different girls in 4 months. Money is overrated. Just go out there and talk to some chicks you like and be yourself man.

And maybe it helps if you are not to picky. Lower your standards for a bit and have fun with different girls.

Good luck !

 

I don't know about everyone else but I can't lower my standards beyond "don't be fat and don't have a masculine haircut."

 

All that you say you need in order to get laid has nothing to do with getting laid. Women want men who are confident. You don't have to have money or your own place to be confident, but if you were more confident by the age of 24 you would have more money, your own place if you wanted it, and you would not be a virgin.
Hope you don't feel like I'm criticizing you, I'm just telling you that it starts with confidence and gets better from there. Try reading some books on how to build confidence and self-esteem, I'm sure you will start seeing positive changes happening for you soon.

My parents were old-fashion and they didn't like me having sex with girls in their house. I moved out of their house when my hotel bills became more expensive than what I would pay in rent. I think I was 22 or 23, but I had been having sex since I was 17.

Good luck, stay strong.

 

Hmm, there's some good advice in this thread. Shame it's mixed up with all this "getting laid" stuff.

 

This isn't making me feel more confident

 

@Progressive Death Mettle, you say you want a beautiful, intelligent and independent, who doesn't need to be showered with gifts. And yet from what you revealed on the thread, you're going for exactly the opposite kind of girl - by trying to compete with guys who throw money around.

Probably one thing to step back and think about is whether you are working towards being the type of person that a beautiful, intelligent, independent and practical girl wants. I'm not an expert, but here are a few things I can think of:

1. She probably wants someone financially secure, and there are two ways to go about it - earn more, or spend less. There are things that you can give up - hanging out at bars, eating out all the time - that will help you with the latter. It's up to you whether getting that girl is more important than these other pleasures that you have in life.

2. She probably wants someone who is independent as well, rather than someone whom she needs to take care of. Living with your parents isn't a deal breaker here, I think. It's what you do at home. Do you help out around the house, contribute at least a little to family expenses, or at the minimum keep your room clean and tidy? If you do that, see whether you can pick up other things - cooking for your family now and then would be great. Helps you to solve both point 1 and 2.

3. She probably wants someone who is practical, and has a direction in life. Do you have an idea where you want your career to move towards, and are you taking the necessary steps to move in that direction? Do you have any dreams in life that you want to accomplish, and are you working towards them?

4. An intelligent girl wants someone who can engage with her on an intellectual level. Do you have that knowledge? What are your passions and interests, and do you spend time in group activities in which you can meet similar people and expand your own skills?

Try to become the person that the person you are looking for is looking for, and then you'll attract them. Also, nobody said you didn't have to put in effort to get the ladies. The right kind of ladies, anyway. The best kinds of girls need the most effort to get - there's no compromise on that.