How it feels to be alone in life.

Low_Key_zone · May 18, 2023

That sense of helplessness, this piercing feeling that sinks deep into the body once you find yourself in this situation.

I know this feeling by heart, i've always been like this.

If we haven't met before, i'm a person with less than a few friends. Ever since i was a child, i had problems with socialization, i always tried to avoid the people around me.

Even nowadays that i'm an adult, i still feel a little bit annoyed when someone that i don't like simply walks into my life without permission.

I tried to go to therapy and perhaps i might've made some progress from that point on, but nowadays it's difficult to find people to be around me.

I recently got into college and it takes some getting used to for me adapt to this new life. Therefore, i guess i spend every single moment of my day at home studying. Which is the one thing i'm passionate about.

Regarding the studying, i've been noticing something weird recently. I've been on a good steak of NoFap, since i started using blocking softwares to restrain my internet access.

The only thing is, sometimes i look around, and there's no one around me to chat or something like that.

That sense of loneliness that comes with progress... It's not only the NoFap, but also every single thing that one can do in life.

Wether it's working out, studying, cooking, anything goes. In order to achieve progress on those areas, you gotta pratice.

The more you practice the better you get, there's only a catch: You might get so good that no one else can keep up.

That's something that've been dealing with recently: my college friends are not as interested on studying as me and most of the things that i do, are done when i'm all alone.

Since i spend most of my days at home studying, sometimes i devoid of social interactions and i know that this is gonna be harmful for my persona growth in the future.

I just can't help it, i only want to study, but sometimes i overdo it, which leads to procrastination, which leads to sadness, which leads to more procrastination as a way to cope and the cycle goes on...

I just wanted to share this with you guys, 'cause my parents would never understand, i can't afford a therapyst to talk to and my friends are not on NoFap so they wouldn't get it.

Usually, i'm a very passionated person, but today i felt so useless, as if all the things that i've been working towards were not as great as they're supposed to be and now i need to deal with some sort of impostor syndrome, or something of the sort.

Maybe i will find a few friends that i can talk to or maybe the ones that i had before will find time for me, i don't know. I just don't know how to deal with this loneliness.

newbobido · May 18, 2023

First of all, you write beautifully. And as much as you think things are hopeless, I feel like you see the world with a very specific lens.

First of all, a part of me is super envious, having a drive to study sits there with the drive to workout, is just great. It’s really ok for you to lean into this drive for a time. I don’t know what you study but I do know there are always people who are trying to push themselves to study harder and harder. There is that saying: “If you're the smartest person in the room, you are in the wrong room”. You can find them, or as a reverse of that, you can help others and be the “teacher” of the group.

I hope it does not sound bad, but maybe you have an option to first socialize yourself online before you go offline. Your writing is great, so there is obviously no problem for you to express feelings and emotions. So if real world interaction stresses you out or something like that, maybe start with an online friend.

And the third thing that pops to my head is the app called Bumble. I also felt isolated in the past couple of months. And today I have my first “friendship date” with some random person in my city who is also looking for a friend. It costs you nothing to put yourself out there, and I like this app because you know that on the other side, that person is also being vulnerable and trying to have a better life.

Deleted Account · May 21, 2023

Mate, don’t worry too much about social skills, they will come with the success you achieve in your later adult years.. if you have a gift for studying, push now and delay gratification - your future self will thank you! I focused all my attention on socializing as a young person and didn’t develop my professional life at all. I had some great experiences in my 20s, but spent most of my thirties alone, depressed, and unemployed. Now I have social skills but no self worth or sense of community or even a paycheck in my 40s. All of my social relationships have moved on with their careers, partners, starting families, and now my social skills are practically useless. Maybe if I first focused on building a future life for myself, then I could spend my late 20s and 30s working on social skills and having actual meaningful relationships.. the relationships in your 20s are never as meaningful as they feel in the moment, you will see this crystal clear in your 30s. Keep working hard and doing your thing man, you will see in 20 years your friends will be single janitors and you will have a real career and a real purpose and a real shot at a fulfilling life! Stay positive and keep doing your own thing, own your story

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How it feels to be alone in life.

Low_Key_zone Fapstronaut

newbobido Fapstronaut

Deleted Account Guest

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