How to cope with boredom?

Discussion in 'Self Improvement' started by Deleted Account, Oct 28, 2017.

  1. Hey guys,

    soo I've just recently relapsed (three times)from a 14-day streak and it really got to me.
    (Not gonna tell the details here.) But I really notice that boredom (and resulting to feeling unnecessary) is my biggest problem. Like when I don't know what to do in the day I kinda get an existential crisis or something like that...

    Most of the time I don't really know what to do.
    Recently I've been playing games, surfing the internet, reading books (psychology, Self development books, mystery...etc.) and been sick..learning some Japanese...
    So I'm not feeling well in general right now. (And after deciding to quit university after only 2 weeks, my parents were stressing as well).

    But most of the time I just stare at my phone and just am on Youtube und been playing games or watching Anime (which could trigger me too and I just sit in front of a computer for that too...)
    And I'm considering quitting games because my wrist hurts after only a few minutes...sooo that hobby falls of I guess...

    Sooo I've wanted to ask: How do you guys cope with boredom (and probably procrastination? Do you plan out every
    single minute of the day, so you're busy?
    I've planned my days before but I've noticed I'm just doing the same things every day..how do you find new things to do every day?
     
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  2. Arohamystic

    Arohamystic Fapstronaut

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    That’s a great question. I used to suffer from boredom as well, especially when I was younger.

    If you are the type of person who does well with a list outlining what you are going to do in a day, then go for it. However, for me, every time I have created a list, I have just set myself up for failure. Also, I found that my life wasn’t so enjoyable – I want to do certain hobbies when I feel like doing them, not according to a list.

    My advice would be to make projects out of everything. Instead of passively engaging in any activity, make the activity into a task with an element of creativity. Here are some examples:
    • Instead of just reading a self-help book, make a plan to compile all the key/interesting quotes from the book and include your own reflections on them.
    • Instead of just learning Japanese passively, make it a goal to speak to a person in Japanese, or translate a manga, or cook a Japanese dish using a recipe in Japanese. (I studied Japanese at high school and I used to love translating the lyrics of J-pop songs – haha).
    • Instead of playing games or watching YouTube videos, perhaps think about making a YouTube video about a game you enjoy.

    I guess the goal is to move from consumer to creator. Being a creator is much more interesting and fulfilling that merely consuming information.

    You mentioned that you are sick, and I’m really sorry to hear that. I was quite sick in my early twenties, and one of my friends said, ‘Use this time to find out everything about the illness. What’s causing it? Why is it happening? How can medicine help? How can changing my thinking habits help? How can spirituality help? How have other people dealt with it?’ By looking into it this way, I was able to see myself as having control over the illness, and not being a victim of it. I don’t know your specific situation, but this approach could help too.

    All the best for the path ahead!
     
  3. That's really an interesting approach, Arohamystic! Never thought of that. Thanks for the advice!
    But, I really can relate to you. I don't want to do things just to have them done off a list. "Done, I forget it and then I just quickly move to next thing" - style.
    Yeah... my lifestyle until now...really is just reactive and not really creative as yours. Then I've to think about what other kind of ..projects I want to do^^
    Maybe I'm gonna make a list about potential projects I could do...
    I really feel like I'm passive and am not really enjoying things. Just always like functioning as a machine I guess...

    Well...its just a cold, I guess but it's been going on for a week now. Really annoying and in the past I had some skin problems as well because of stress. Not to mention, I still have Depression....
     
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  4. Arohamystic

    Arohamystic Fapstronaut

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    Yes - life is much more fulfilling when we do things that we authentically want to, rather than tick things off a list.

    My lifestyle is still very reactive unfortunately, especially in the evening when I am tired (which is why I am a member of this forum - haha). However, I do think having a series of projects is a really good way to stay motivated. The idea is to start with small projects (ie instead of saying 'I am going to write a book,' maybe start with 'I am going to plan the plot of a book' or similar). If you want some help with potential projects (especially Japanese learning ones) feel free to send me a message.

    Also, it is good to get out and about, if possible. Joining a gym, a club, or some other kind of group is a good way to meet people and to beat boredom. Depression is frustrating because it can drain your energy and motivation to do things. Just take one day at a time, and remember to seek professional help if you feel like things are getting out of control.

    All the best!
     
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  5. Thanks! I'll come back to you if I need help!
     
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  6. saurabgangul

    saurabgangul Fapstronaut

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    Well the biggest change u can do now is to limit your internet usage and download anime one season only and limit your viewing gradually and try meditation. I dont even turn my pc on these days i do watch some videos on my mobile but i waste less time now.
     
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  7. That would be reasonable.
    Then what are you doing instead on being on the internet?
     
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  8. lamstronger

    lamstronger Fapstronaut

    With every passing day of nofap it's easier not to PM when you're bored. I listen to music on youtube, exercise in my room when im bored. In my case, it's not so easy to get bored, since I always have studying to do (that's what happens when you study medicine lol). I try not to procrastinate, I'm getting better at it, I have only messenger now on my phone university. I guess try to keep yourself busy and remember why you started this nofap journey, when you want to PMO.
     
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  9. Buzz Lightyear

    Buzz Lightyear Fapstronaut

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    First of all, consider all those who are worse of than you. Not just in your own country, but on the entire planet. This frame of mind will introduce you to the notion of 'gratitude'... and then you will be thankful that you have the leisure time by which you suffer boredom in the first place.
     
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  10. Mavricko

    Mavricko Fapstronaut

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    Just do what you feel like instead of over thinking it
     
  11. mikimiki

    mikimiki Fapstronaut

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    Hi brother, same issue here. In my case, 90% of relapse always caused by boredom, so it is troublesome for me as well.
    So far I have not found a definite way to cover me from feeling boredom, but I am planning to start cleaning my room if I am bored (absurd I know), or start planning a new project or small scale business, or asking a friend to go out, or at least texting a friend. I don't know yet what will work, but I will keep you posted
     
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