How to counter arguments for PMO?

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction' started by SpiritAgainstFlesh, May 28, 2018.

  1. In the very liberal state of California, middle schools such as mine has normalized PMO.

    So, people like me gets bombarded with arguments that tries to convince me (unfortunately rather successfully because my PMO brain just need a little bit of justification). Obviously these are justifications made by naive 14 year olds, and spending time on NoFap allows me to see the real effects of PMO. However, I AM NOT VERY GOOD AT ARTICULATING THEM.

    1.) A normal human being would take sex over fap since sex is the better version of fap. So when the event comes you will be fine.

    2.) People who fap still have sex/have children.

    3.) PIED is not real because people gets aroused by nakedness.

    4.) Porn is not much different from real sex.

    Again, there is clear evidence and answers to these arguments found on NoFap. But they refuse to acknowledge the danger.
    How do I get my friends to see the danger? How to Get them to NoFap?

    I need clear articulate rheotorics.
  2. Headspace

    Headspace Fapstronaut

    Something inside of them has to already be aware of the harmfulness of PMO. If they just ignore your arguments, there is not much you can do. Nevertheless, you can still disprove them. Here's my take on the four justifications you mentioned:
    Sex is not "the better version of fap". It is not that linear. You are fapping alone, while sex always means you have to socialize with someone. Your sex partner is not an object, but a person, and it can be scary to share intimacy, because you need to dive right into reality instead of escaping from it. Moreover, if you are used to fapping in isolation, having sex is something your dick really is not used to. When you masturbate often you are used to a firm, controllable grip of your hand, but a woman's vagina is not that tight and, most importantly, you have a lot less control about what's going on. You need to make compromises. Third, porn gives you the illusion that you can have any girl you want, any time. Having sex with only one woman can quickly become dissatisfying to you to the point that you'd rather feel like fapping home alone.
    May be, but relationships are becoming more and more unstable and divorce rates increase. This is due to changes in society, too, but can these be separated from the general acceptance of porn? Doesn't sound easy to me, especially when you have a political view on porn being part of the sexual liberation movement. You need statistics for this argument. [Won't look them up now. I believe I've also seen statistics stating that performance issues in men are, in fact, increasing.]
    PIED is not about arousal by looking at people, but about what happens when you actually put your dick in a vagina. As long as you don't do this, you won't know if you have PIED or not. I learned about my PIED the first time I had sex. I had no difficulties with masturbation, but was unable to ejaculate when with a woman. My first climax during sex was four months into a relationship (after having tried many times) when I went without porn for a few days, as I started to feel there's a connection.
    So, how old are your friends, again? Did they already have sex? It is a lot different. The sad thing is that watching porn and masturbating doesn't even teach you anything. Porn is usually made to arouse men, so you don't know what a woman likes by watching it. But it's not only that: You don't even know what you will like. Your favorite sex position in porn can be a lot different from what you like during actual sex. Other than that, you have probably a lot of practice with edging (controlling your ejaculation) during masturbation, but this can not be applied to sex as well.
  3. Thanks for the thorough feedback! Sadly it seems that most teenage boys has already dabbled in some form of PMO. Whatever the case, your answer just strengthened by conviction.

    Thanks again! :)

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