How to emotionally detach from my own parent's and relative's behavior?

Hi! I can relate with what you are saying. It is difficult not to be affected by their behaviour but for our own growth and progress, it is necessary to end our own suffering at first. I'd share some things which helped me in my journey

• Realize that your parents themselves are suffering because of their patterns. They may look like villians but in fact they are victims. Recognize this. Recognize their suffering. See the pain they are going through. Forgive them for the pain they caused to you. Accept them. Thank them for the good things they done for you...the love you shared. If they say something negative and hurtful, don't take them at face value.
• Don't try to prove them anything. No matter what good deeds you do, your parent's won't change. If they have tendency to control you, no matter what you do to please them, their tendency will not end. No matter what you do to prove them wrong, they will never understand you. I used to get good grades to please them but they'd still complain. Then I got bad grades to show how much their toxicity is affecting me, but it made no difference as well. It was a mistake trying to prove them anything. Later I began to work on myself, for myself and doing the things I valued. It changed me and the way parents interacted with me. So I'd say stop trying to prove anything to them or make them understand anything. Work on your life for your sake.
• Take total responsibility for your actions. Never blame them for your predicament. Blaming means weakening your potential. It is self-insult. Take up the mantle of trudging through the pain. Never blame parents for anything.
• Tell them to get help. But don't invest your emotions there. Their recovery is their job. You can tell them to get help. But beyond a point, you should not push because then you'll be the one ending up frustrated.

The greatest gift that you can give to the world is your own self-improvement.

Take care friend

 

I would have voted for mediating but didn't because you're talking about making them meditate too. You can't someone do something. You can make suggestions but nothing more than that. I say meditate and exercise regularly because it will help you cope with your parents. It might also help to read some stoics such as Seneca and Marcus Aurelius.