How to get out of my house...

Discussion in 'Self Improvement' started by Deleted Account, Jan 20, 2018.

  1. Let it be shame or shyness, the bottomline is i can't face the world. I wasn't like this during my school days. After changing my hometown and coming to a fast city, my life has become slow. May be due to acne marks. Maybe due to my psycological problems. I am afraid of challenges. I am afraid of people. To look them into their eyes, forget about girls. I am not able to meditate for too long. I have a superiority complex for no reason. People don't like me more often becoz i am either shy and lacking confidence or i am rude.
     
  2. kayesem

    kayesem Fapstronaut

    One step at a time.

    It is called agoraphobia. The longer you do nothing, the worse it will become. So well done for wanting to do something!

    Just do little journeys and keep doing them until they become second nature. You need to battle the voice of fear in your head every time. It takes a while, but we all have the same problem to some extent. It does get easier.

    If going for a walk at night is easier for you, then do that. Or get up super early and walk before there is anyone around outside yet. There are plenty of small challenging things you can do in other areas of your life, and they all add up to help you deal with the rest of it. Intermittent fasting. Cool showers. Preparing meals at home rather than eating junk.

    The poison is the remedy, in this case. The longer you avoid it, the worse it gets. The more you put on a brave face and just do it anyway, fear or no, just decide to do something, go somewhere, and actually do it, the more you kick the shit out that voice and take back some control over your life. No one can fix this for you. You need to face it yourself and overcome it, one step at a time. Become your own best friend and do yourself a solid.

    I know from experience. Just start with the easiest things you can already do, then slowly increase the intensity. If you need lessons in the beauty of trying new things, just observe / hang out with children. All they ever do is try new things. Kids are not afraid to go outside, so it is something you learned along the way, and something you can re-learn, you only need to set your mind to it and be firm with your decisions.

    Oh, and stop caring what people think. You cannot control that and so just take responsibility for your own thoughts. Don't let insults or compliments go to your head, they only distract you from what's important.
     
  3. Yes sir, you are right. I didn't the actual term agoraphobia but it is the thing. I usually avoid the places where i can get panic attack for eg. Crowded places. I will really have to change this. I will be doing some goals on everyday so that i can counter this. Thank you so much sir for sharing your information.
     
  4. kayesem

    kayesem Fapstronaut

    You're welcome mate ☺

    Yeh crowds of people are hard to deal with, and busy places.

    Keep good notes and be sure to keep track of your progress, it helps you be accountable to yourself and build up some momentum for things you have started to take care of already.

    Exercise helps so much with anxiety. I started simply walking 1 hour every night a little over a year ago. I did it before but fell out of the habit. I walked at night on purpose, to avoid people, and still choose paths that have the least amount of other people possible, while still getting around some trees and fresh air.

    After doing it for some months, I look forward to it, and walk earlier in the fading light of the late afternoon. I am not afraid of being out in day light as much. I have improved at being more open and friendly towards other people. Not all the time, but I can say hi sometimes to some people, and I usually feel better even though it spikes my anxiety.

    I miss the night sometimes because I like seeing the stars, shooting stars, comets, meteors etc. but yeh, it will get darker again in winter. I never had panic attacks. I do find it easier with someone I know being with me for some reason.

    Anxiety is also a symptom of a cooked brain from porn, so the longer you can stay away from PMO, the better you will feel. It never seems to go away completely, you just get better at managing it and it does not bother you as much over time.

    Good luck! You can improve if you set your mind to it ☺
     
  5. 5speed

    5speed Fapstronaut

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    Have you maybe thought of hitting the gym, getting some muscle put on you, new haircut and some different wardrobe to help you with your confidence? How about getting good at something and having something interesting to say? Don't handicap your self, suck it cupcake and go enjoy your life, first step, stop PMO and don't be afraid to fail.
     
  6. Supermarron

    Supermarron Fapstronaut

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    Slowly but surely get better bro
     
  7. Supermarron

    Supermarron Fapstronaut

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    Slowly find the best habits for yourself don’t need to hurry, you can lose the battle but don’t lose the war, then you will man up.
     
  8. kayesem

    kayesem Fapstronaut

    Yeh well said. It takes time.
     
  9. Start going out to get a drink or whatever in malls or such places. If you see a bench sit down. Browse your phone if you want, but look around too. Get comfortable. Ask people for the time. Smile. Open conversations in the queue, enjoy the experience : )
     
    Supermarron likes this.

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