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How to know if you’re healed or just waiting for another wave of withdrawals?

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by hokipa, Feb 21, 2023.

  1. hokipa

    hokipa Fapstronaut

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    I’m 5 months in and after some weeks of intense withdrawals I started feeling a little better but not that sense of enthusiasm and inner peace people talk about when they reboot
    Anyway, recently I started thinkin about sad things and scenarios almost like I did in the first part of my journey, just when I thought I was almost fully healed, sadness arised again in my mind, my question is: How do I know if I’m fully recovered/healed or I’m just in a “calm” phase before the next storm of withdrawals come?
     
    JJackson likes this.
  2. JJackson

    JJackson Fapstronaut

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    Hey man! I've been clean 5 years now and have been where you are before. I already made a post about it, just skip down to the part that says is from 2023. Hope you'll find something useful from it: https://forum.nofap.com/index.php?threads/compiling-my-advice-from-being-5-years-clean.186908/
     
  3. hokipa

    hokipa Fapstronaut

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    Yes, I’ve just read it man, and I get what you’re saying
    but I must clarify something: I never suffered of any mental issue (depression/particular kind of anxiety etc.)
    all of these emotional rollercoaster with sadness/hopelsness/sense of existential void occurred when I actually stopped PMO so it must be withdrawals-induced and lasted almost 2 months

    anyway, I started feeling a little better for a few weeks but still not felt 100% healed cause I never felt that sense of inner peace everybody seems to feel when they talk about recovery
    so my concern was the one I asked you: as you’re completely and fully healed, (5 years like you say) how does it feel when you heal? I mean completely healed, not in a calm phase in between withdrawals, do you return like you were before in terms of psychological perceptions or do you always have to expect waves of withdrawals from time to time forever and start cohabit with them?
     
  4. JJackson

    JJackson Fapstronaut

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    I also thought i didn't have anything but the porn addiction was a way to numb the underlying pain that's already there. So once I stopped those "withdrawals" weren't just from the lack of porn but the lack of numbing the pain thats already there. Pmo was the thr flood gates to the deeper pain so getting rid of it let all of that out. I thought for a long time it was only from my brain wanting porn but it wasn't.

    Even if you feel you don't have underlying depression or trauma or anything, look into some of the other factors like mediation, exercise, nutrition. Those things had a surprisingly huge impact.

    As for feeling healed, yes I feel fullt healed and no I don't get waves of withdrawal. During the 1st year or 2 I thought I was having waves but I grew to realize that stuff was from the other factors. So if I have "waves" now it's because those other things and since I'm doing good in those areas I'm doing pretty good! Definitely never have a desire for porn at all. That was gone after a year at most.
     
  5. hokipa

    hokipa Fapstronaut

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    Well, you make a good point and I think that could be partly true
    but other people who fully recovered says that not always those who develop an addiction has underlying issues or trauma they try to cope with, sometimes you just find yourself trapped in PMO because you simply like it, it’s addictive like other things you can attach to

    so, during a reboot it’s obvious to change some behaviors or start new hobbies, but if mine is simply a case of P withdrawals, will I come back to my normal state after I fully recover? Even if it may take 1 year or more (by the way, how long did it take for you to fully reboot with the disappearing of all withdrawals, and did you feel that sense of freedom and enthusiasm like everybody says? Sorry if I bother you but not so many people who recovered tend to write much on this forum, you’re one of the few
     
    JJackson likes this.
  6. JJackson

    JJackson Fapstronaut

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    I would say about a year, maybe a bit more to fully rewire. It's not all or nothing so you just feel better and better over time. I definitely got that freedom & enthusiasm from it. The withdrawals technically took close to a year or more to go away but again, it wasn't really withdrawals, just pain that was already there which porn used to keep numbed. So I feel certain that if i handled the other things sooner the withdrawals would have been gone sooner. So I wouldn't really know how long if it's only an addiction but probably not more than a year.
     
    hokipa likes this.

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