How to make love? From a recovering s. Addict

Discussion in 'Dating during a Reboot' started by green lion eating the sun, Nov 21, 2019.

  1. I'm a girl in my late 20s. I'm seeing a guy in this period. I feel I'm bonding with him sometimes. I don't know how to deal with it. Usually in the past I tried to destroy it and ruin it but I love bonding. I'm starting to prefer deep talking, mental bonding to even super great s. And I'd like to trust again but I fear to be abandoned again and if I opened up like he did and he attacks me with what I told him? It happened 0on the past

    First time we had s. He opened up about an ex gf that has his child. He never knew she was even pregnant by him. He showed me pictures of her and the child asking me if they looked alike. He sounded very sad about it. He opened up to me other times. I thought it was beautiful but I dunno what to do with it even though that's what I always wanted. A deep loving and trusting connection with a guy that cares for me truly. He is vulnerable. I could attack him with what he told me about him and use his weaknesses to make him feel awful but I think that was an act of trust or is it normal for a guy to open up like that? We knew each other already for few months at our former job but we were friendly and laughing and not really deep conversations, normal stuff between colleagues

    Also some tips on how to make love? I think I read on nofap about tantric s.? It's not i don't make love but feeling me and him are truly bonding even in bed more like we are one, passion is there but something that connection beyond that. Last time for example we fell asleep holding hands and hugging and we looked at each other's eyes for a while and that was so beautiful. There was something magical in the simple gazing, powerful
     
  2. klaris

    klaris Fapstronaut

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    I think you need to break up
     
    FellatiousD likes this.
  3. why? it is because i am still not ready or it is because of him? I wanna be able to share my life with someone worthy. I am so tired of being alone and only my closest family to be vulnerable with
     
  4. mxmn

    mxmn Fapstronaut

    what a weird thing to say without any further explanation.

    I think it's beautiful to be vulnerable. tips on making love? just forget everything from porn and take it very slowly. caressing a lot, communicating about it. it's a nice habit to ask afterwards "what did you like about the sex" or someting. just be open and vulnerable, it bonds you together with him. tantric just means being very slow and in the moment (afaik), so breathing in the same rhythm, caressing each other for a long time, not having an orgasm as a goal (as a man at least as woman can have mutiple). you can read up on it.
     
    praus6qwet likes this.
  5. fredisthebes

    fredisthebes Fapstronaut

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    Making love to me means a seduction, talking and complimenting each other, telling each other what feels good (not just barking orders in a P-ish way). Being honest, being vulnerable, being intimate. Creating a nice environment. Falling asleep together. Texting him at work the next day to say how much you enjoyed it. Not playing games or being manipulative, not playing with power over each other or blowing hot and cold.

    It sounds like you are doing fine already tbh.
     

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