How to meet chicks

Discussion in 'Loneliness' started by BornAgain'18, Jul 13, 2019.

  1. BornAgain'18

    BornAgain'18 Fapstronaut

    I'm 28 years old, I'm tired of jacking off and watching porn, and I'm tired of not going out and meeting chicks. I'm going to make a change.

    Has anyone had success improving dating/social skills?
  2. Twonk

    Twonk Fapstronaut

    It is quite easy. Just go to events where the are a lot of girls. Just talk to them about random stuff. Sooner or later you can hookup. But remember to be relaxed about it.
  3. fapequalsdeath

    fapequalsdeath Fapstronaut

    I don't like this advice, let's say you go to a dance class with the sole purpose of meeting a woman. You have the following options: there are women there that you like or there are not. Let's say there are. Then you try to go out with them and statistically speaking there's a higher chance for them to say no - they are taken/don't fancy you. And what is the result? You go to this activity you've wasted your time money and energy for nothing and the goal is not achieved... Might as well go to some stupid club when there's retarded music blasting through the speakers while you go deaf and try with some half-drunk woman, you'll have better chances, because guess what she is in this club not to dance, but to put herself on the shelf, so the "best man" can take her. Yes you can meet a woman at work also but GL keeping your job if she reports you for harassment, or you can go to the library(which is usually a good place) again with the hopes of meeting some woman, but again she went there to read, not to date. So GL pal, when you find a good method that's not as pathetic as online dating come and tell me.
  4. BornAgain'18

    BornAgain'18 Fapstronaut

    Yeah I'm gonna start going out to bars and clubs from now on and try to build these skills one brick at a time. I'm at square one so for tonight I'm just gonna get out of the house.
  5. PeterJL

    PeterJL Fapstronaut
    NoFap Defender

    Try visiting an incubator.


    Sorry. Couldn't help it.
  6. I don't know if you date a shelf girl in the club, she might just want sex, not a serious relationship. And if now you only want sex, it's fine, but it will be harder to get a serious girl later. Up to you.

    Ps. The incubator joke killed me xDD hahaha
    mgz069 and Freedom_from_PMO like this.
  7. chastedude

    chastedude Fapstronaut

    Not a problem because no one says you must meet your dream girl the first time you go to an event. Some events cost money, others do not. The important thing is you go out, meet some girls, practice walking up and chatting with girls and building up confidence along the way, etc.

    The key thing is not to have the sole purpose of having to find a woman that day. Otherwise, you’re setting yourself up for a miserable night.
    RealMe, Reborn16 and Twonk like this.
  8. Twonk

    Twonk Fapstronaut

    Exactly my idea. Good point.
  9. We need humor here from time to time. Good one!
    Freedom_from_PMO likes this.
  10. Kexas23

    Kexas23 Fapstronaut
    NoFap Defender

    Read the Game by Neil Strauss. Meet 5 girls a day. After a month or two of practice you will have success.
    Practice, practice, practice!
  11. I've got no clue, perusing through the chat to see the best tips myself.I like how you say your going to make a change, I felt a surge of motivation and positivity as I read it.
    Deman likes this.
  12. Reborn16

    Reborn16 Fapstronaut

    It's a bit confusing these days...

    Speed dating is a good option to start with. You are guaranteed to meet and chat with women around your age who are likely emotionally stable and interested in dating. This is however a very small segment of the available women. And in my experiences, can be quite limiting in finding compatible partners.

    Clubs and pubs are great for finding people with emotional hang ups. There's a reason they need to be both in a place that's too loud to hear, and be too drunk to care, before they can entertain the idea of getting to know someone...

    Online dating can work. But doesn't represent a huge portion of women who are out there living their lives in a healthy way. You're missing out in that sense. And are much more likely to find someone with baggage as well. There is also the issue for some on NoFap that online dating is too similar to porn, searching through lots of pics etc.

    So where does this leave us?

    Ideally, you want to focus on places where you're most likely to find women who suit your values and interests to a certain degree.

    You can focus on a few things you're passionate about, then go to places related to those passions that are likely to have women.


    You're into fitness? go to the gym and yoga classes
    Into dancing? join a dance class (this one is gold because you're guaranteed to meet and chat with many women)
    Do you like any particular course or training or organisation? join one and meet people there

    The key here, is you're not going to these things for the sole reason to meet girls. Instead, you're going primarily because you're interested in the activity, you want to have a good time!

    Meeting women, having a nice chat, exchanging details, these are just natural byproducts of enjoying yourself within your passions.

    Now, this is just the surface of how to meet and attract women. But as you can see, it's not that hard to find women that are most likely to have similar values to yourself.

    I highly recommend a book called 'Models'. There's a thread with a bit more info on that here...
    RealMe and mgz069 like this.
  13. fapequalsdeath

    fapequalsdeath Fapstronaut

    I swear man if I got 5$ every time I heard that I'd be rich. I feel like there are more guys nowadays going to dance classes with the hopes of meeting women than actual women in there. Usually, this turns to a dickfest at the said activity.
    OnTheEdge likes this.
  14. mgz069

    mgz069 Fapstronaut

    Well im gonna give you a little different approach.
    If you go to X place just to meet women, women can easily pick up on that and will probably won't end up well!
    You should socialize more, yes, but don't make "meeting women" your primary motive.
    You gotta go out and have fun with friends first! Then you can approach women around you. And almost every time you go out you will find at least one girl that you like.
    Its important because:

    Motive > Meet women > Goes out > Does not meet women > Ends up miserable

    Instead it can be:
    Motive > Have fun > Goes out > Has fun with friends > Meets a woman there > Cheers up > Had a good time and met a new person
    Motive > Have fun > Goes out > Has fun with friends > Doesn't meet woman > Mood is still fine, because had fun > Next time will have fun again

    I'll try and shortlist some tips from my experience:
    1. Don't try to learn pick-up lines, practiced speeches, body postures or whatever you read online
    2. Don't be afraid to make mistakes when talking to a woman. Mistakes make you wiser.
    3. Don't TRY to impress any girl. Let it flow
    4. Loosen up!
    5. Read "Models: Attract Women Through Honesty" which is an excellent book on this subject and it's 100% real stuff, 0% bullshit, 0% unicorns and shitty "advices" from the "be an alpha male" community. No... forget about that shit.
    6. Work on yourself. Maybe go to a gym. Start a healthy hobbie. Read a book. Do whatever pleases you.
    7. Groom yourself. You don't have to become a douchebag who only cares about his looks and spends a fortune on clothes etc. But a nice haircut or beard, with a couple of decent clothes, clean shoes and proper hygiene is a must for any man!
    8. Stay on NoFap. NoFap makes you 10x times better at communicating with women and im not talking only about flirting! Its important to have female friends too. And in fact, having female friends will help you to interact better with women.
    RealMe, Reborn16 and Deman like this.
  15. Fork2323

    Fork2323 Fapstronaut

    Just look good and hit on every cute girl you see everyplace you go all the time.. The supermarket, class, gas station, on the street, everyplace.
    If 90% out of 100 turned you down, 10 said yes. Pick the top 4 out of the 10 who said yes and take them on a date.
    Also all the best women I have ever dated I all met through a mutual friend at social events.. So make friends with everyone all the time too and expand your social groups and participate in them.. They way to become part of a social community is to participate in it.
    Become a team leader and every girl wants the alpha and then you have the pick of the crop.
    RealMe likes this.
  16. Yolk

    Yolk New Fapstronaut

    Boii this stuff is complicated
  17. Reborn16

    Reborn16 Fapstronaut

    Or you could put away $5 each time you hear it and try it for yourself!

    I've been going to salsa and bachata classes for almost 2 years. On the odd night the ratio is out of balance, it's because there's more girls than guys...

    And besides, I imagine quite a few of the girls are also hoping to find a partner, if they are single why not?

    But I like dancing. If there weren't as many girls, I'd still be going. If you went just to meet women it wouldn't be as much fun. So in all seriousness, avoid it if it's not for you. But still you can apply this to something you genuinely enjoy!
  18. 29 years old, only started getting lonely and wanting to meet chicks, so here's what I did.

    Grab an ice tea cause i'm gonna be here a while.

    Start by making your bed in the morning. Every morning. (This is beneficial in the long run, because she sees you as a responsible husband.) Then clean up your house entirely, and keep it clean. Like SPOTLESS clean. (If your mother was like mine, she could spot a thin veil of dust on a dust-colored countertop.) Clean like there's always a vacuum in the living room and a magic eraser beneath the sink, and you're constantly doing laundry, and dishes because you don't want it to pile up. (Apparently most women think men are sexy when they do housework. don't argue with it, just do it, it makes her happy, like when she does her thing on your Mr. Happy.) Don't play video games. Like, at all. Actually, get rid of video games, make no hint that you are a gamer. (Most women see video games as toys for children, last thing your woman needs is another man-child.) At the same time, pump some weights and keep adding muscle to yourself and taking fat off, and stop eating out so often. (My favorite thing to do anyways. actually if pumping iron isn't your thing, get some sort of hobby or club where you can meet people.) Next, get rid of clothes that you don't feel work for a mature man of our age. (Pretty much anything with cartoon characters, logo shirts, sports jerseys, that big dumb leather trenchcoat you bought that scared your boss that one time.) Start brushing your teeth...and flossing, and mouth washing, not just brushing. (she wouldn't want to kiss a bad breathed guy, would she?) Start observing women and try to figure out a pattern of what you TRULY want physically in a girl. look at the unmarried guys and look for patterns that might indicate what NOT to do. Look at the married guys to indicate a pattern of what to do. (Study like crazy. Now is the time to be fruitful and observe.) Get the sleep you need so you can be as healthy as possible. And finally be healthy as possible, my drinking and smoking weed are being cut down to size, which leaves me with one last go without masturbation until I get a wet dream. which should be long enough.

    Now if you can do all that, truly do all that, then you are on the right track to your significant other.
    Last edited: Jul 17, 2019
    PeterJL likes this.
  19. Sharksvv

    Sharksvv Fapstronaut

    Can you explain to me in a well thought out logical explanation how online dating is pathetic? polls and stats have been done, a significant chunk of relationships today are born from online dating. I met my girlfriend of going on 3 years now from a dating app, there are millions of couples who are now married having met online. Its simply the way of our ever more technological future.

    This Vice article was published 2 days ago, it talks about how as of 2017 39% of couples met online and the trend is moving upward, that is a significant chunk of couples you see around you in public. No doubt in my mind that during the upcoming 2020's decade at least 50% of the couples you see walking around will have met online.

    I think people who vehemently bash online dating are those speaking from bias due to having a lack of success with it.
  20. fapequalsdeath

    fapequalsdeath Fapstronaut

    I do not want to diminish online dating it is completely possible to meet a well-behaved woman through it. I would have second thoughts about a woman, even a man using online dating. Why don't you go out in the real world and meet a partner there? Maybe you are scared of the prospect of being rejected as a man, or having difficulties presenting yourself as a woman? The saddest part is when you meet a woman and get into a relationship she'll always know until the end of the relationship that you are a weak man who has not voyaged and put himself out there against adversity and trouble to get her. You just clicked some fucking button on an app and there you go. Is online dating easier, more comfortable and practical? It is. Is it more dignified, courageous and even romantic? I wouldn't say so!

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