How to stop escort behaviour

Hey dude,

The most important part of your story is that you are admitting that you have a big problem and that you are willing to change yourself.
You currently don't know your path and what to expect from beating this nasty habit.
However, your story resonates with mine and I have been through a similar issues and still am healing from it.

"All i want to do is stop my escorting behavior and these bloody incest thoughts."
> Your escort behavior and fetishes are all tied to your porn addiction and the exciting rush you get from this.
If you want to heal yourself completely there is no other way then to 100% stop looking at porn from now on.
Even soft porn (aka images) is off the table. Also you will have to stop masturbating from now on for at least 90 days.
Whilst doing so you will find your mind and body slowly rewiring. How long it takes will depend on how healthy your lifestyle is
and from what age you have been watching porn. I wouldn't worry too much about the incest fetish, because it will go away

Just like many explainable fetishes found on this forum, but be patient and never ever go back to watching porn.
Instead focus on your self and spending your time and energy into a positive hobby's likes sports.
After a while you can go out dating again and then you will find yourself slowly disconnecting from your addiction.
But like a heroin addict you will always be addicted and vulnerable for relapse if you play with fire again.
The bonus is also that your PIED will heal over time, but be sure to inform(leave the hooker and incest part out!) your new girlfriend
about your past porn addiction so she can be relaxed about it.

 

You can find my personal story and struggles here:
https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/my-first-real-step-to-become-hard.252704/

Its not easy letting someone you like to peek into your darkest weaknesses, but you just have to trust your feelings.
I'm currently chatting with a girl I'm going to meet up soon for our first date+sex.
I told her about my past porn addiction and how i stopped watching it 5 months ago and stopped masturbating since 3 weeks. This topic came up when i told her why my past marriage failed and I resorted to porn to disctract me from my sex deprived marriage.
She totally understood and offered to help me by taking good care of me in her bed soon

I'm all with being honest, but there are many dark things about me that I can never tell a woman. For example my hooker visits, my strip club visits, my sick porn fetishes I was watching like transwoman, rape, aunty sex and cuckold movies. I'm not that guy but my addiction was pulling me towards more extremes.
Dark creepy shit like this will scare off a normale woman, but its ok to tell a girl about your past porn addiction and ED.
By doing this she wont blame herself if your ED pops up and you feel more releaxed and thus lowering the chance of ED due to nerves.

However, its not bad to have "normale" fetishes ,but make sure they are truelly yours and not your porn addiction.
I have been talking with my date about what we are going to do to each other soon and even though I was carefull in the beginning. I let out my true fetishes once I found out how kinky she is.

 

You gave all the right answers to yourself! How to stop? Visualize how you feel afterwards. Think about the lost money and time. Think about the lack of intimacy and how it is even hard to stay hard. Your post is proof, that you already know, that this is nothing good for you. Just stick with your decision to not do it, when you feel that way. Then find out, what triggers you and avoid those triggers. I get the urge, when I pass a brothel in the middle of the night. It gives me excitement and an opportunity. So I take another way. When I get the craving to have sex with a prostitute I know exactly what I am craving for and I realize it is not sex with a prostitute and doing it would not fulfill my desire. Then you have to find another way, to fill the empty space, the escorts filled. Escorts have a purpose for you. You have to find a substitution.

Yeah... that's risky and I think it is not worth it in the end. But you are not dumb! It is a natural desire for intimacy and this intimacy is so important for you, that you are willing to risk your health for it.

Naaa... that's not disturbing at all. You would be surprised how common that kind of fantasies are. The fantasy per se isn't a problem. Maybe it goes away, maybe it will accompany you a little longer. Try to be in the moment, when you have sex and try to enjoy the person in front of you.

Such persistent fantasies are sometimes called old friends, you know. You can try without them or you can use them from time to time to get off.

Then stop going to escorts when you already know, that they don't give you, what you really desire and accept your incest thoughts.