How to stop objectifying women?

Discussion in 'Loneliness' started by crazyhorse11, Aug 19, 2020.

  1. Psalm27:1my light

    Psalm27:1my light Fapstronaut

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    The only women who I’ve met who might fall in the “ want to be objectified” are those who have been physically/ sexually abused and erroneously believe that is their only worth. Unfortunately that’s a lot of girls. the best compliment I’ve ever had was when my husband said “ he loved my mind and it was one of the sexiest things about me.” He said “ I love who you are”. That is what a woman wants, because we all age. No one looks 23 forever. We want to be loved and attractive for more than just our body. 33 years and my husband still likes me! Lol no way I look even close to what I did in my 20’s. If you’re objectifying women, you will never truly appreciate the woman you have, because there will always be a better body walking by. If you think it’s natural to objectify then my question to you is do you do that to your mom, sister, daughter? If not, why? If it’s all natural then your beautiful daughter should turn you on right? You allow yourself to objectify or not. Society says it’s ok to objectify women who are not related so you allow yourself. It’s not ok with women related so you don’t. Unless your a porn addict or rather, a lust addict.
     
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  2. phwrancesco

    phwrancesco Fapstronaut

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    Your politically correct is nauseating.

    Plus, you didn't get the "in context" part of the comment: there are some situations where women like to be objectified (during sex for example). Of course this don't apply to a family table, so if you're having dinner and you start traeating her like a object, here is the real problem.

    I can easily say your way to think is perfect to become good friend of a woman, but no one wants to be the girlfriend of a man who can't give her that feeling of being objectified a bit (and in the right context).
     
  3. she-dernatinus

    she-dernatinus Fapstronaut

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    Of course we don't. It all goes back to basic gender roles and how people are raised to behave. That's the global answer behind it all.
     
  4. she-dernatinus

    she-dernatinus Fapstronaut

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    I think you don't understand the difference between healthy attraction and objectification.
    I also don't see a reason to be so irritated by it. It isn't about political correctness, all that he said is true. There is nothing "politically correct" about re-evaluating the way we have been conditioned to think.
     
    Psalm27:1my light likes this.
  5. she-dernatinus

    she-dernatinus Fapstronaut

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    It reminds me of a nauseating comment trump made about ivanka.
     
  6. Randy Andy

    Randy Andy Fapstronaut

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    Rather than blindly try to understand as in noodle real hard I benefit from looking to my experience. That might sound like the same thing :). I mean looking inside myself to see what the experience of objectifying is really like not what I think it is like.
    For instance it looks from the op that there is some resentment maybe at women, at least feminists. That's understandable but unhelpful if the goal is to break the objectification-paying-for-sex cycle :). So looking at things that the mind deliberately ignores will bring more benefit than a big debate for and against, that whole conversation is one big exercise in mental masturbation and even more useless an expenditure of energy.
    So I don't have a view but my experience is it feels uncomfortable because obj.is wanting and wanting is not happy since by definition I believe I need the thing I want to be happy. Based on that I avoid doing so on purpose since it makes me less happy and less comfortable but I had to look at my tendency to gravitate towards unhappiness as if I liked it :)
     
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  7. Minsc

    Minsc Fapstronaut

    Oddly enough, I find prayer to help.

    "God, reveal to me who this person actually is and not who I want her to be. May her life be blessed."
     
  8. Kddyy

    Kddyy Fapstronaut

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    I think is objectification of women is linked inderectly with lust of men and greediness of cinema industry as men want more lust more short clothes on women to see thier body and as a result of this all cinema are trying to showcase women in small clothes tight pants ,etc to gain their viewership of men and time by time this cinema goes into mainstream and people call it fashion and everyother women around started this type of clothes which tempt men and i think this is the soul reason for objectification of women
     
  9. Enulv

    Enulv Fapstronaut

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    It will stop on it's own. Just reboot your brain from porn ;) It happened with me.
     
  10. ThePeakWae

    ThePeakWae Fapstronaut

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    See them with compassion and not passion.
     
  11. PeterGrip

    PeterGrip Fapstronaut

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    What you say makes sense to me! An intellectual debate can only take you so far. In my own experience, I have heard about objectification for many years, but never understood it intuitively before attempting to grasp my emotions during nofap.

    However I will say that the vulnerability concept resonates well with me as something I have started discovering in my personal life recently. Opening up as a human being is wonderful. I have started to smile when I'm happy seeing someone. It can be strangers too. I saw a girl on campus, she was like 20 meters away. It was late at night in the weekend, she looked nice, and I was happy to see another person staying there late like myself. I looked her in the eyes and couldn't help but give her a big smile. She smiled and waved at me, and that was all there was to it. Before nofap, I know my line of thinking would be something like: "There's a pretty girl there. What do I do to get to her in my bedroom?" (Which is ludicrous, as it would fill me with anxiety. Besides, I never acted on it anyway.)
     

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