Humour!!

We all need to lighten up sometimes. Why not add NoFap jokes and/or funny stories below?

Humour really is the best medicine and can really help us view things from an angle we might not have previously considered.

Here's one to get the ball rolling...


A man stummbles in to see the doctor.

"Doc! "I have this problem", he confides.

"You see my secretary loves to make love. Every morning when I get to work, instead of bringing me a cup of coffee, she throws me across my desk and makes mad passionate love to me! Then, just before lunch she pushes me up to the filing cabinet for a quickie! And before I leave work at the end of the day she always gives me a farewell screw".

"Hmm", says the doctor, "so what seems to be the problem?"

"Well, you see doc", the man explains, "my wife is a nymphomaniac. Every morning before I get up she jumps on me and were hard at it for at least an hour before the alarm clock goes off. Then, when I go home for lunch every day we have a quick one whilst I'm actually eating! And then each night we have a marathon session before we go to sleep!"

"Hmmm", says the doctor, "I still don't see what the problem is?"

"Well doctor ", the man explains, "I keep getting these dizzy spells every time I have a wank!"



17 reasons not to take life too seriously

 

Bearing in mind the above joke I was literally just reading a book called 'Wake Up' which is Jack Kerouacs take on the life of the Buddah and this little passage jumped out of the page at me...

"Like a king who rules all within the four seas, yet still seeks beyond for something more, so is desire, so is lust; like the unbounded ocean, it knows not when and where to stop. Indulge in lust a little, and like the child it grows apace. The wise man seeing the bitterness of sorrow, stamps out and destroys the rising of desire."


Now that's enough of that already(!)...

 

I went to see the nurse this morning for my annual check-up. She told me I really needed to stop masturbating. When I asked why, she said, "because I"m trying to examine you!"

 

I dunno? Maybe I just got a sick sense of humour but I think this is hilarious, especially the comments!!

http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-chat/1194757/posts

http://m.chron.com/news/nation-worl...es-for-masturbating-during-trials-1945301.php

 

Please read these and then watch the videos. They will make you laugh and cry. How many of us can relate to this...

"Thoroughly unprepared, we take the step into the afternoon of life. Worse still, we take this step with the false presupposition that our truths and our ideals will serve us as hitherto. But we cannot live the afternoon of life according to the program of life’s morning, for what was great in the morning will be little at evening and what in the morning was true, at evening will have become a lie." ~ C.G. Jung

“The lie tastes sweet at the beginning, but bitter at the end. The truth tastes bitter at the beginning, but sweet at the end." ~ Buddha

“At every crossway on the road that leads to the future,each progressive spirit is opposed by a thousand menassigned to guard the past.” ~Maurice Maeterlinck

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b3wCj2sZPoM&feature=youtube_gdata_player

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6ghIoPLyJ-k&feature=youtube_gdata_player

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f3sd74OWS3o&feature=youtube_gdata_player

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yKL7Qem0k8U&feature=youtube_gdata_player

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LensYmf-AIY&feature=youtube_gdata_player

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0v9WhRpQw8E&feature=youtube_gdata_player

 

No humour thread would be complete without a contribution from Mr Hicks...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=maiNUTmWNAk&feature=youtube_gdata_player

 

Ha! Yep we spell the proper way over here! Cheers, your going pretty good yourself sir, nice one