Husband quit because I asked him to. I know everyone will say that he is lying but you don't know him. He doesn't believe in lying and has quit other addictions cold turkey that could kill other men. He sets his mind to something and that's it. He is doing it out of respect for me but he believes this is all crap and that I am "acting like someone out of the 1800s." My question is, if he is not in it mentally like the men on here are, would he still get the benefits? Would we ever have the deep intimacy that I so crave? P.s. to help him get through the first few months, I have promised to give him 2 blowjobs a week. Hope that helps curb his cravings. What else can I do?
You said that the other times he did it on his own but this time he did it for you. If he really wants to quit this addiction he has to do this for himself, if not he is bound to relapse. I highly, highly recommend a book called Out of the Shadows by Patrick Carnes. It has topics about people like yourself who try to help their partners manage thier sexual compulsions. Good luck!
If he is not going out of control and if he is able to control it as soon as you say, then he is not a PMO addict. Just try to help me in ways such that he always comes to you. Just read about Karezza if you're interested in. People say it's really a good method of bringing a great intimacy and togetherness
I would suggest marriage counselling, quite a bit of what you said popped quite a few red flags in my mind. I would go on my usual brutally honest rampage but marriage is sacred and you guys need a professional. You two need some real heart to heart conversations because clearly neither of you are satisfied with things as they are, and I doubt he is going to stop porn if he is doing it for you alone. Communication is the only step here, he needs to lay it all out and so do you, then you two can find middle ground.
Personally, if you want intimacy, you cannot just give him quick sessions so easily. Practices like Karezza or any tantra has always proved to bring intimacy well. Both of you should understand each other, and focus on bringing intimacy. You cannot do the war alone.
