husband that stopped porn but doesn't believe in quitting...

So as someone who's girlfriend back in the day wanted him to stop using P, at the time I tried it, and I wasn't able to stop it. I ended up convincing myself it wasn't as bad as she said it was, and eventually I would lie to her about it to make her feel secure. We're no longer together for alternate reasons, but now I'm at the point in my life where I see that it IS a problem for me. The hard thing about a lot of this is you can't force someone to change who doesn't want to, as was mentioned above. They have to want to change themselves, and there's no easy way to get them to do that. For me what prompted me was sex addiction after my breakup and realizing I didn't have any meaningful romantic relationships in my life. Its hard when you're in the addiction and trying to change for someone else. You're just more likely to resent what you're doing and the other person than you are to making a habit that sticks.

Good luck to you and your husband.

 

You're situation isn't as bad at it feels. He quit porn (his preferred addiction) for YOU! That's fantastic! That means he loves you a ton, find the gratitude in that, it's there from the right perspective. I'd recommend checking out the Tony Robbins relationship courses. There are 2 I've done and it completely rebooted my marriage. The best part is only one partner needs to do what the course teaches and the other partner will organically respond. My wife did zero work with the course and still doesn't, but my attitude and actions have so radically changed that she is enamored with me. She went from avoiding me to loving me intensely in about a month. We do have "downs" but they are less frequent and I recover faster. The best part is the it's all natural, no techniques or BS. The courses are called the Ultimate Relationship Program and something like Love Making to Making Love. I printed the workbook and dug in. Don't push it on him. Don't ask him to do it with you. YOU do it. This is your journey. You're gonna be surprised with the results. Please let me know how it goes if you choose to do them.