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Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by Ogikubo, Jan 24, 2019.

  1. Jan 24, 2019 #1
    Ogikubo

    Ogikubo Fapstronaut
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    Hi. I have read many posts and I feel like I could have written some myself. I’m 55, married, two kids, good job. I have been masturbating since I was a kid, but masturbating to porn has hurt me in so many ways. I’m just not a happy person. I don’t have a sex life with my wife. I have ED, surely from spending hours in a death grip. I feel like I can finally walk away from porn, although I honestly don’t really think all the benefits some people talk about here will happen to me, mainly because of my age . But, if I can just leave the jerking off and the porn behind, I think I will be closer to the genuine man I want to be.
     
    Ogikubo, Jan 24, 2019
    Ogikubo, Jan 24, 2019
    #1
    Jim2015 likes this.
  2. Jan 25, 2019 #2
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    Hi, great to hear that you want to walk away from it. Good luckk on your journey here!
     
    Deleted Account, Jan 25, 2019
    Deleted Account, Jan 25, 2019
    #2
    Ogikubo likes this.
  3. Jan 25, 2019 #3
    Ogikubo

    Ogikubo Fapstronaut
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    Thank you very much.
     
    Ogikubo, Jan 25, 2019
    Ogikubo, Jan 25, 2019
    #3
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  4. Jan 25, 2019 #4
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    Make sure you make statuses or have a journal to talk about your journey so you can receive some support!
     
    Deleted Account, Jan 25, 2019
    Deleted Account, Jan 25, 2019
    #4
  5. Jan 25, 2019 #5
    Faceplanter

    Faceplanter Fapstronaut

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    Make sure you own it. You can do this, and you can get help, but it's your decisions that will make you succeed or fail. If you were locked in a solitary prison cell, you wouldn't die from having no porn. Make a goal and stick to it. When you fail, make mental notes on why and how....might take a few times to notice the patterns.

    Maybe make a goal no internet for a week as that's the route to the problem for most these days, maybe make a goal of watching 25 movies you haven't seen and take the time away from Porn. Involve your wife, even if that isn't telling her the whole picture right now (a little success first makes that conversation easier, I will admit, but I am pro coming out with the problem in general).

    Good luck, and I would suggest starting a journal here once you really get started.
     
    Faceplanter, Jan 25, 2019
    Faceplanter, Jan 25, 2019
    #5
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  6. Jan 25, 2019 #6
    Ogikubo

    Ogikubo Fapstronaut
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    I really appreciate what you have written. I did try journaling before & got to a month, but it wasn't the same as sharing feelings with guys in similar situations here. I have definitely tried in the past six days - six days! - to stay busier than usual. I've done more cooking, worked out on my own and with her, and have been better able to concentrate when reading books, something which hasn't happened in years. While it's easy to blame the internet for my problem, I need to add that this forum on the 'net is also the best assistant to changing my behaviour. But you are right: I gotta own it. Thank you very much for your words and encouragement.
     
    Ogikubo, Jan 25, 2019
    Ogikubo, Jan 25, 2019
    #6
  7. Jan 25, 2019 #7
    Retentionman

    Retentionman Fapstronaut

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    Well man, see it as another type of activity at your age, for example workout. Have you seen 55yo start excercising at your age and become fit as fuck? I've seen many testimonies on youtube, now does that mean that you enjoyed a fit life in your youth? Not at all, but that does not mean that you can improve in so many ways at your age. Man up, you are not an elder anyway. You can do this I trust in you. Cultivate your sexual energy from now, it will be hard as fuck bit it's perfectly doable.

    Regarding your ED perhaps aside leaving PMO you should start doing kegel excercises (google it) I also highly recommend reading books from Mantak Chia, good luck brother
     
    Retentionman, Jan 25, 2019
    Retentionman, Jan 25, 2019
    #7
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  8. Jan 25, 2019 #8
    Ogikubo

    Ogikubo Fapstronaut
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    Cheers! I do work out, but maybe the PMO has sapped me of the energy I need to do it properly. TBH, I think my workouts have always been a bit on the lazy side. I'll check out Mantak Chia and I really do appreciate your words. Thank goodness for the site, it's been the most clear headed and motivating thing I've ever encountered. Thanks again!!
     
    Ogikubo, Jan 25, 2019
    Ogikubo, Jan 25, 2019
    #8
  9. Jan 25, 2019 #9
    Retentionman

    Retentionman Fapstronaut

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    Awesome, actually the workout thing was as an analogy but it is great that you excercise lol, and no worries man, I'm sure your life will improve vastly. Be strong
     
    Retentionman, Jan 25, 2019
    Retentionman, Jan 25, 2019
    #9
    Ogikubo likes this.
  10. Jan 25, 2019 #10
    Ogikubo

    Ogikubo Fapstronaut
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    I also appreciated not being quite an "elder" LOL cheers and keep up the great work!!
     
    Ogikubo, Jan 25, 2019
    Ogikubo, Jan 25, 2019
    #10
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