I admit that i have lost control of my life.

i really have. ya i go to work, and do all the things that im supposed to but underneath i am just sort-of a robot. I went to a new years dance the other night and for the first time in a long time i was actually excited about interacting with girls. Its made me realize how dormant my inside feelings are. and i mean the good inside feelings that are passionate and pure. Every day i say im going to do this or that but what actually ends up happening is that i waist tons of time watching netflix, youtube and eventually looking at porn. Ive sorta just stopped trying and feel like im in some cycle of habbits that i cant break.
But there is good news. Im ready to restart. (even though ive said that about a trilliion times). Im going to implament a new plan, ive gained new insite. And ive gotta site my source on this because i think it could be usefull for you people. The video is called something like: why im quitting porn and its by some channel called kinobody. Anyway the main point was to not set yourself up for failure by saying that you are going to quit something forever. Instead start with a small goal like three days. The dude talks about how just accomplishing a small goal can make you feel good and so the next time you can make it a little farther until your mind begins to enjoy and seek that type of reward.
You have all probably heard something similar to this and it doesn't sound new but it is something that i have forgotten. So tommarow im going to start fresh on day one and go for three days. I dont even care if nobody reads this i just needed to put how i was feeling into words.