I am a sick sick fuck

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction' started by jcrea006, May 4, 2015.

  1. jcrea006

    jcrea006 Fapstronaut

    I am a sick fuck, a dirty no good bastard, a worthless no good piece of shit. I don't have just a problem with PMO I have a problem with doing it in the most disgusting horrible fashion possible. I am disgusted and ashamed of myself but there's nothing I can do about it. I want to get better and I've tried and tried but I've failed and failed. There is an evil disgusting demon living inside of me and he won't go away. I'm going to have to live the rest of my life with this sickness
  2. UnspilledGLORY

    UnspilledGLORY Fapstronaut

    Dear jcrea006,

    in whatever form or shape you are in, and whatever you feel like (shit, I presume?) you are Loved.

    Somebody, somewhere will always have you in their heart, and you are worth it. The challenge is for you to accept and love yourself as you are.

    Self-loathing will not take you anywhere, so use it as a fuel and transform it into a motivating factor.

    You can change. I have seen it happen. I used to look in the mirror and hated what I saw. Eventually I surrendered to Love.

    There is no end to the possibilities. Our brains are adaptable. Look up neuroplasticity if you want to read more about it. The most important thing you have to do is to believe.

    You are here on nofap now. You have taken your first step towards greatness. Now let it all out, and write what you want to share. I am sure that everyone in here wants to see you evolve and grow and help out in any way possible.
    Proxydore likes this.
  3. SadFapper

    SadFapper Guest

    I fell the same way but as your streaks get longer you should notice that your more extreme fetishes become less and less appealing, keep trying and never give up
  4. Abu X

    Abu X Fapstronaut

    Its very hard i know but please be possitive and don't put yourself down. You are not shit you are the most wonderfull creation ever to be created in the world and you can be the best of this creation by changing. You are in the right place, chin up keep your head up and be proud of yourself. You can be PMo free jcrea006
    am2eazy likes this.
  5. Limeaid

    Limeaid Guest

    What does the demon want? How can you soothe it? Right now you are choosing PMO in a way that feels uncomfortable for you. What other ways can you meet it's needs? Who created this demon inside of you and why have you let it take over you?
    BallsOfSteel likes this.
  6. Abu X

    Abu X Fapstronaut

    The only way to conquer the demon inside you is patience and abstinence from sinning. There are many ways to control the demon (also known as caprice) eating less which involves starving the demon, eating healthy, you will be surprised how much eating healthy helps your inner self, home cooked food is the best, less takeaways and outside catering, ready made meals etc.
    Keeping yourself busy and exerciseing also helps.
  7. fapster85

    fapster85 Fapstronaut

    "I've failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed."
    - Michael Jordan

    "Why do we fall? So we may learn to pick ourselves up"
    - Thomas Wayne and Alfred (Batman Begins)

    Don't give up man. Learn from your mistakes and keep on pushing. One day we will be one of those success stories having accomplished 90+ days of being PMO free!
  8. KoalaDude

    KoalaDude Fapstronaut

    You probably do have one. Maybe multiple.

    You have to stop feeding it what it wants, then feed the ones that will benefit you like: Strength, Patience, Endurance or whatever principle you want to see your life to live by.
  9. Ah bro, you are not alone in this thing. I have done and watched things in my life i did not imagine were possible since i went down the hell hole called masturbation. Its perfectly all right. It doesn't matter who you are or where you are right now, but who you choose to be from now on. You may fail seemingly endlessly, but never ever give up no matter what happens, keep trying.
  10. Abu X

    Abu X Fapstronaut

    Well done Fapster, a few good quotes there, I like the batman one. Love the trilogy!!
  11. SUB0

    SUB0 Fapstronaut

    just claim down man...now you are on NoFap & i m sure you would love yourself oneday so much that you wouldn't need this thing for your TEMPORARY HAPPINESS...so get up and beat your demon;-)
  12. Dan McKnight

    Dan McKnight Fapstronaut

    , I love your honesty. I'm in the same boat too. I've chosen to surrender and fight no more. By doing so it allows me to seek help and find strength from fellowship such as this. I have (had) several addictions and sought treatment for them however this has/is the hardest one to Crack. I do work a recovery twelve step programme, find strength it in and have found a great deal of help in the aa big book. Essentially addictions are all the same. I am a sick person trying to get well, not a bad person trying to get good.
  13. Forget the past we have all been there,I too have spent weeks laying in my own sweat and body fluids,thinking what a disgrace I was.I decided that I need to stop this shit in order for me to grow stronger and live a better life.So keep trying.Dont give up it's not going to kill you!Everytime you fail!Get back up and dust yourself and begin again.Being on this site is part of your recovery process.Good luck!
  14. scotey73

    scotey73 Guest

    Good. You got all the negativity out of your system, and now there's only room for positivity and optimism. Shelling out a rant like that just feels like a weight lifting off your shoulders, doesn't it? You've come to the right place, my friend. You've taken the first step toward recovery, by realizing you have a problem and talking about it.

    All of this negativity will die off soon, I promise. Look at yourself in the mirror, and tell yourself one thing that you love about yourself. You'll feel kinda sorta better instantly!

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