I am afraid to go to university because of porn addiction.

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction' started by YAYYYYYYYYYYY, Feb 22, 2021.

  1. YAYYYYYYYYYYY

    YAYYYYYYYYYYY Fapstronaut

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    Probably, the semester will begin in the middle of the year. June or July.
    But i am so afraid! Afraid of not being enough, being too much shy, fear of judgement, fear of the classes and lectures! I'm not shy, I am a real extrovert. But because of that addicion, I have became so afraid of people, afraid of connection. I feel like crap, trash when I am with other people. ANd it seems like people from university are "superior". I can't explain... At the same time, kinda manage this situation and everything turns up good, but idk... inside of me I still having this negative feeling.
    How can I manage go to university being like this?
     
  2. Trobone

    Trobone Fapstronaut

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    Fact is that 95% of the people around you look at porn as well. They're either not addicts (just like some people drink alcohol and are not alcoholics) or are addicts and have not realized it yet.

    This does not define who you are. If you tell people, some might judge you, others might not. The key is to be you, do what's best for you, and not make decisions based on others.
     
    Rocky Mountain and TheForsakeen like this.
  3. SREENII

    SREENII Fapstronaut

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    while reading your thread i'm remembering my own college days..very similar..inaddition to this,i had problem in interacting with girls and teachers.This problem get even more worse if you continue PMO..i think our brain produce a cocktail of chemicals when we masturbate..this chemicals may be responsible for the change in our behaviour chemistry..this will make us feel more guilty without any reason, u will become a coward and an introvert shy person..it will distract our normal breathing pattern, creates a feeling of brain fog, increase anger and frustration, everytime we are in public we feels very insecure and will see ourselves as a failure..it will make your university life a disaster if u didn't stop this..throw away your smart phones...u don't want it, just buy a classic nokia set for communication..save yourself..
     
    Rocky Mountain likes this.
  4. Timecop

    Timecop Fapstronaut

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    Ask yourself how you can manage to get rid of porn and masturbation instead, you still got time until summer.

    What have you try so far?

    What are the things that get you urges?

    What are the triggers? Being alone? Boredom? Stress?

    If you are not sure, grab a pen and wrote down what leads you to a relapse.
     
  5. YAYYYYYYYYYYY

    YAYYYYYYYYYYY Fapstronaut

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    I was with more than 1 month, but 18th I just PMOED, then 19. 20,21 clean but today I did it again. I was way better, less shy and more comunicative, less ashamed too.
    Most of the time being alone is what triggers me. I got a notebook and now I commit myself to use it only at the living room.
    I've started this with 13, now 18 trying to stop since 15. So I think that 3 - 6 months are enough to do a good reboot.
    Thank you man for the tips man. I don't want to bring this addiction to the university and waste my 20's...
     
  6. YAYYYYYYYYYYY

    YAYYYYYYYYYYY Fapstronaut

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    Thanks for the help man. I really don't want to continue with that until the university days... I need to be at my best 100%
     
    SREENII likes this.
  7. En?gma

    En?gma Fapstronaut

    I have a similar problem, i feel exactly the same but mostly angry when people try to be superior. This is the gerarchy.
     
  8. runner0424

    runner0424 Fapstronaut

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    I was in college with this struggle. Just keep at it and have everything possible to fight it with knowledge and what triggers you etc.

    I have had 18 years or so of struggle with porn. Here is what I have learned:

    I relapsed twice after 6 months Or so being porn free. I was beating myself up over it and depressed for a few days, I’m currently a year free from that relapse. Although in this year, I had 2 near relapses and straddled the line and looked and tempted myself more than I should have back in December and January.

    I have a wife and kids and I had to tell her when I relapsed on one of times in 6 month gap. she has helped me , Along with a few friends opened up too. It lifted a huge weight off.

    I have learned a lot in my struggle with porn. One, is what triggers me. A lot on the internet and tv triggered me(seeing beautiful women). I believe my last relapse was super bowl halftime show, I didn’t relapse that night, but like a week or two after it, but those images stayed with me and I kept wanting more, even after 6 months. The relapse before was seeing on ESPN website the athletes body magazine and got curious which athletes made it and had beautiful woman. Had zero intention of doing porn, but those were triggers.

    I also researched And watched videos of the science behind it all and it releases dopamine In your brain and scary how the addiction can become when I thought I could control it.

    the ways I feel like I have conquered it for good was that I had my wife put in an adult filter password that I don’t know what it is(it could be a friend if not married). It’s my backup plan when having a bad day and can’t see the adult sites. I also don’t watch shows that could trigger me and try to turn my head if I think a scene is coming. More importantly though, I have really grown in my faith with God. I have listened to so many sermons on temptations and that has helped me tremendously. Rick Warren and Greg Laurie are 2 of my favorites and have helped me a ton!! I learned about all the garbage I was putting in my mind. The analogy was how we have to watch what we eat, we can’t eat McDonald’s fried food every meal without bad consequences, the same thing applies with what you consistently put in your mind. We are trying to undo years and years of bad addictions and it takes time to undo that.
    “Above Inspiration” YouTube videos are great too. Give them a listen, it’s usually 10-20 min long.

    Hopefully this helps and try and learn as much as possible and avoid whatever gets you tempted and triggered. M make it a lifestyle change and don’t beat yourself up if you have a relapse. Just learn from it and keep trying to do better. Porn free radio podcast by Matt Dobschuetz
    I also told myself , I would help as many people possible struggling with this as I could once when I got it under control.

    Learn as much as you can and it is beatable. Hopefully some of these tools and analogies help.
     
    ArMed_ElK and Timecop like this.
  9. ElderStatesman

    ElderStatesman Fapstronaut

    You manage it by trying. Won’t know otherwise. You’ll likely be fine, and having interactions plus work to do should focus your energy and attention away from porn.

    If you’re not thinking in terms of goals, think about thinking. Setting a day counter for yourself might be an easy place to start.
     
  10. ThePeakWae

    ThePeakWae Fapstronaut

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    I went to university never had those problems, though I'd argue your case can be more problematic depending on how things around you unfold and how you act.
     
  11. One piece of advice: make sure there's no porn on your laptop before you open it in class (or make sure to sit in the last row). Not an experience I'd recommend.
     

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