I approach girls (My journal)

Discussion in 'Self Improvement' started by SPIRITUSS, Sep 22, 2020.


    SPIRITUSS Fapstronaut

    We all have things we would like to do but don't dare to do out of fear.
    It's something we can all experience, we've all been in a situation where... we wanted to take action but there was this fear that held us back. The fear of being rejected, of not knowing what to say, of not being good enough, of going beyond the limits of what we think is socially accepted. Fear of other people's eyes.
    Three years ago I decided to explore these fears and see how far I could go.

    And I honestly didn't think it would turn my life upside down so much. It has become an adventure in which we learn a lot about ourselves and the world.
    I realized that it's possible to go beyond what we thought was possible.

    Feeling that fear, all those doubts that come to your mind, but going in spite of everything is an act of kindness to yourself. It's like standing on top of a mountain and seeing a whole other world. You don't know anything about it. Until now you have only lived in your own world. And there another world presents itself to you with infinite possibilities. You are standing there and the truth is there is only one question to ask: Am I going or not? You decide to take the risk and leave your old world behind and turn to what makes sense to you. You totally lose control of what's going to happen.

    Yes it's difficult, I don't count the number of times I was shitting myself.
    This feeling after overcoming our fears is something that can't be written down. We become aware that.. we are our own limits.
    But especially that behind fear is something greater.

    We come out of it grown and changed. Every situation is an opportunity to express our vulnerability, to learn, to grow and to have fun.
    I think that above all it has allowed me to be more human with myself and with people. To dare to express what I felt deeply without constantly needing to hide something and act contrary to who I am.

    It becomes an adventure, and you become your own hero. And believe me, it's intense and fulfilling.

    Welcome to my journal. You can join my discord about self growth, nofap and dating https://discord.com/invite/5ZCJKYAyjh
    Last edited: Nov 27, 2020 at 4:56 AM
    Supination and Inspired2chg like this.
  2. Queek The HeadTakker

    Queek The HeadTakker Fapstronaut

    Watch out for the ones who have a surprise on between their legs yuck .......brrrrrrrblmlmlmlm
    Silver36 likes this.

    SPIRITUSS Fapstronaut

    Have a date tonight. It's 10am I already approached 2 girls on the street after my workout.
    Have incredible self confidence these days it's cool
  4. pump20

    pump20 Fapstronaut

    You know what, don't do women attraction because you may not know if they have evil spirits inside of them. That's what Jezebel/succubus comes into play. Physical beauty is no beauty. Another thing is you're more likely to have wet dreams while you're sleeping because of women attraction. Think about that for a minute. Let them come to you. Rule of thumb, either they notice or ignore.
    brodyns19, Quiet Riot and Asgardian36 like this.
  5. Inspired2chg

    Inspired2chg Fapstronaut

    That’s a good idea. Hope it works out for you.
    SPIRITUSS likes this.

    SPIRITUSS Fapstronaut

  7. L3t'sG0

    L3t'sG0 Fapstronaut

    Very cool. I don't know where you live but make sure you're prepared for the pandemic world outside.

    SPIRITUSS Fapstronaut

    thanks dude, and France, we all wear masks but I don't care no excuses haha
    Asgardian36 and Supination like this.

    SPIRITUSS Fapstronaut

    I had a good date.
    I went for a drink with a girl I approached on my way out of the gym.
    She's a pretty serious girl in her way of being. Very cute. She's interested in personal development. We talked about a lot of serious topics. She is an interesting girl. It's nice to spend this kind of time. It's rare.

    I plan to see her again. I continue to talk to other girls every day in the meantime.
    For information I am not closed to serious relationships. It's with this kind of girls that I want to be in a relationship. But I live in the present moment. It was a good moment but I don't have any expectations about what's next. We'll see what happens next.
  10. Queek The HeadTakker

    Queek The HeadTakker Fapstronaut

    Thats witcher stuff
    MasterofBait likes this.

    SPIRITUSS Fapstronaut

    1 year ago i realized:

    To become good with girls there is only one question to ask:

    What do you think of yourself? What is your relationship with yourself?

    If you have fully realized your value, if you have decided to stop acting like a victim and take responsibility for your life, it will all be felt on the outside.

    Most people believe the answers lie on the outside. I had someone not long ago who asked me what I say to girls when I talk to them.
    It doesn't matter

    -girls will love you for who you are and not what you say
    -it goes beyond words. Don't focus on words but on attitude and well being
    -stay detached because you can't control everything. Girls have their own way of thinking and you have to respect that.
    -respect your emotions, accept them and express them.
    - Show your vulnerability, without wearing a mask
    -overcome your fears. I am talking about your life. You are going to die one day. What image do you want to have of yourself?
    - Have fun and share the love you feel for yourself to the world, without expecting anything in return.

    SPIRITUSS Fapstronaut

    How I respond to a girl who ignores me after my date proposal.

    It happened yesterday. This is a girl I approached on the street. We talked for 10 minutes and I took her number.

    I asked her out and 6 days later I still don't have an answer. What to do in this case.
    Resending a message is the right solution. If this girl has marked you, don't let your fear and lust take over. This is a girl that I thought was cool the way she was.

    1. Understand her

    You met her very briefly. You don't know her. You just had a good time with her but it was quick.
    Don't put unreal expectations on the situation.
    What you want is to let her know that you understand her reaction.

    What I said was:

    "If you had said no I'm not motivated to go for a drink with you, I wouldn't have forced anything. I'm cool. In any case I understand, we don't know each other."

    2. Show your vulnerability.

    If this girl has made an impression on you, now is the time to really show it because you're never going to see her again. Stop being someone you're not and assume your desire

    "It pisses me off because I liked the way you were and your simplicity."

    3. Don't forget your values

    You are not going to question your values and your person in order to please anyone. Especially not for a girl you've talked to for 10 minutes.

    "But ignoring someone is one of the things I hate that's not part of my state of mind."

    4 . Be Caring

    Because you love yourself and you don't want to hurt anybody

    "I wish you all the best for the future."

    you are not sending this message to hope for something with this girl. You are sending it as a sign of respect for yourself and the world. That's it. Don't let your ego take over as i said you can't change people the most important thing is the relationship you have with yourself. Share love, respect your values and that's it :)
    Last edited: Sep 25, 2020
    Silver36, Sc8r51o1n, lnm263 and 2 others like this.
  13. lolos

    lolos Fapstronaut

    Fuark bro you are crushing it. Dont know what some of the spergs in this thread are on about.
  14. omerico2121

    omerico2121 Fapstronaut

    Very inspiring thread!
    My love life's been very thin and I've really wanted to improve myself in this area.
    I think I'll start pursuing this goal as well, approaching ladies and asking them out.
    I just have one question for you: Do you do it by yourself or you have some bros/gang to come along?
    Rador likes this.

    SPIRITUSS Fapstronaut

    Thank you for your message.
    In the beginning, I did this with friends who were in the same process of personal development as me. Because fear is very intense at the beginning and it's good to have someone to push you.

    Now I sometimes walk with friends and when we see a pretty girl we go talk to her. But most of the time I am alone because my relationship to fear has changed. I've incorporated talking to girls into my everyday life.
    And the more you are aware of your value, the less rejection can hurt you.
    I wish you a lot of success!
    Last edited: Sep 24, 2020
    Silver36 likes this.
  16. doubt I know what women attraction is as a whole but may have done it.
    Appreciate the caution.

    SPIRITUSS Fapstronaut

    Last thought of the day. My following posts will be dedicated to my evolution.

    It will always be difficult. Do you think it's easy to get up at 6am to give everything i have at the gym?
    Do you think it's easy to go and talk to the girls I like?
    Do you think it's easy to be rejected, to question yourself all the time?

    There will always be fears, doubts, failures, moments when you feel like shit. I understood that these moments are part of life.
    I have failed again and again for the last 2 years. But I never gave up. Not once. Because this is my life. And my life matters more than anything else in the world.
    I don't want to look at myself in the mirror at the end of my life and tell myself that I didnt give everything for what was important to me. That i didn't dare to approach this girl because of the fcking grandma sitting next to her

    It's not about fear, it's about what you do with it. I'm always afraid. I am afraid before I approach a girl. I'm afraid before asking her out. I'm afraid before kissing her.

    BUT I take action despite these doubts, despite these fears. I will always be in doing it rather than thinking about it. Because I have understood that behind fear are the most incredible moments you can experience.
    It is a process. A way of life. More than just talking to girls. It's loving ourselves unconditionally. Becoming free and realizing our true value.
    And no matter what the obstacles, I will continue to move forward.
    Last edited: Sep 25, 2020
  18. Man, I love this thread.
    I am in the same process, but I just started (I am 17).

    This summer something changed inside me. I started being more confident, I started talking to more and more girls, and finally, at the end of August, I had two kisses (with two different girls!).
    Now I have a different perspective on life. I stopped playing games, I stopped losing time at home, I stopped wasting time in teenage activities.
    In some ways, I just decided to enter the game of adults.

    When I speak to a girl, I joke with her, I am secure, I flirt so much.
    IT'S A DRUG.
    After the first approach, you can't live without doing it again. It is a shot of pure dopamine, but this time it is safe and healthy.

    I will certainly follow you in this adventure, trying to get tips from your posts.


    SPIRITUSS Fapstronaut

    Ahah exactly. When you know you can talk to any girl, it becomes a drug.
    It's cool that you're starting so early.
    And every guy in this process knows what it feels like to approach a girl. It feels like superman.
    Αλέξανδρος likes this.
  20. I know I am pretty young. But that's the cool thing: I have so much time to learn and get good at this game!

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