I can't do it anymore

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by Judicious 7, Jul 30, 2016.

  1. Judicious 7

    Judicious 7 Fapstronaut

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    This is probably my last thread or bout of activity. I can't do this anymore. Mods, if this thread is in the incorrect forum then delete it or move it, or whatever you guys do.

    I can't do this nofap thing anymore. I don't have anymore motivation to keep it up. I can't get passed two weeks sober on "hard mode". I've been struggling with this ever since I was 11 and I don't see a way out honestly. I hardly have any friends anymore, and I don't have any other motivation to get better. My family is fine, but they can't help. I'm supposed to be an adult and take care of my problems on my own but I can't. Every time I would try to be clean, I'd fail after two weeks. It's pathetic. I'm tired of failing over and over.

    I have no support. Nobody cares. I'm alone, and I deserve it. Nobody cares about me. And I guess I don't care about myself. I can't see a way out. Maybe this is a cry for help or attention but it's something. I cannot do this anymore.
     
  2. Don't give up. I care and all of us here care about you. We are all in the same boat.

    We all need each other.

    "Why do we fall? So we can learn to pick ourselves back up!"
     
    Blyme, goldstein, iHappy and 4 others like this.
  3. Hey if you have kik pm me your username. And I'll add you to my NoFap kik accountability group. That goes to anyone else reading this too. Guy or girl.
     
  4. Steven Goodale

    Steven Goodale Fapstronaut

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    You've got this, you just need to find something else that you haven't tried, just keep with it, we know you can do it and we care about you.
     
  5. MsPants

    MsPants Guest

    I hope you come back to read these responses and realize that everyone here cares and this is a huge support system for you.
    You may not get passed 2 weeks, but you make it for two weeks. That is an accomplishment. I think you may be focusing on the daunting 90 day goal and really kicking yourself for "failing" within 14 days. Try to focus on small goals. Start with 14 days, prepare yourself for what usually triggers your relapse, reach out to others for help on here. When you make it to that 14 day goal, set another small goal to continue, or if you relapse at least celebrate that you hit your first goal.

    The very long goal of 90+ days can be extremely difficult to achieve but don't beat yourself up. You've had this addiction from a young age and it will not be easy to kick this but attempting to is the best thing for you. Not giving up gives you strength. You will make it when you persevere. You will never accomplish what you want in life when you sit back and choose not to do anything. You have been doing something about this addiction, be proud of that. Instead of focusing on "failure", use your relapses as a way to contemplate what triggered you and better prepare yourself for the next time. Use it as a way to learn about yourself. Stick with this!!
     
    ivanhoe, Napav, Yesodi and 3 others like this.
  6. Star owl

    Star owl Fapstronaut

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    If i can give some advice i know it's hard believe me if anything get as much help as you can. I have tried to do this by my self before but with the help of my family and friends i have made it 56 day's no mo and 36 day's with no p. don't give up dude keep fighting i know it sucks but there are so many benefits in the future for nofap stay strong my friend!.
     
    kenpachi79, ivanhoe, iHappy and 2 others like this.
  7. Jeremy nico

    Jeremy nico Fapstronaut

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    Hey bro get up! Ive been adicted for 9 years.. And i never can stop even just for 1 mont, the longest i remembered just for two weeks . But u know life must go on and we have to make the rest of our life is the best of our life. Dont look the failure because God never give us a trial that beyond our capacity. Come on sucker! Should I kick ur ass so u can get up! Wake!. Come on u just have to do and give something to other people , smthing that u never got.. I u never felt a true love so give ur true love to someone that u love so it makes u better and winner
     
    ivanhoe likes this.
  8. Son_of_Iroquois

    Son_of_Iroquois Fapstronaut

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    You're being too hard on yourself.
     
  9. Thrices

    Thrices Fapstronaut

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    it thought the same before i went 15 days without it,believe me,its not over till u say its over.and u knw wts the great thing,thr aint no time limitation,u vcan go at it again,and again and again,no one's gonna kill u for tht,so my sweet bro,givin up aint a thing coz it has no end nothing.thngs tht exist are the one's tht have sm kinda ending and tht is effort and effort and effort.give urself a reward every week u spend without it,and a punishment everytime u fail.i tried almost 100 times believe me before i made 15 days,so the time wil come ,think abt ur new tactics and strategies.think of it as a game.life is a game.the thing tht worked fr me,get a notebook,and tickmark eachday that passes,itll help u a lot believe me,and on a seperate page,write notes of what u learn everytime u relapse... so next time it will help.even if u can make 1 day more thn before wen relapse,ur improving,and improvement is never fast,its always slow,allways slow
     
  10. AntiqueRevolverGuy

    AntiqueRevolverGuy Fapstronaut

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    Dude, you can do it. Don't believe what scientists have to say. You CAN control your will and stop masturbating. It is hard at first, but you can overcome it.
     
  11. Judicious 7

    Judicious 7 Fapstronaut

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    Mhm. I agree. The hardest part is accepting it.
     
  12. SpotlessMind24

    SpotlessMind24 Fapstronaut

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    My friend, I think you are closer then never to do this, and you know why? Becouse you cannot redirect yourself until you are knocked out. And if its true what you described, means this is the moment you got knocked out. You cant stay at the ground forever, and there is only one way - to rise up.

    Calm down few hours, days, weeks. After just came togheter and rise. Pretend PMO was a wound, which healed, dont even think about PMO, go and enjoy life. Dont get desperate couse at start its difficult and empty, just remember at the end you will find yourself, and this will improve you as a person. The key to win this is to gain more pleasure from NoFap then from PMO.

    Rise brother!
     
  13. Judicious 7

    Judicious 7 Fapstronaut

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    I think i'll do that. Thank you..
     
  14. Diomedes

    Diomedes Fapstronaut

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    That's pretty much how my attempts last spring (and the myriad ones prior to that) went. Look at me now. After getting more resolve I started anew and this time I succeed. Quite probably thanks to finding out about Karezza and a lifestyle that leaves the big O out.

    Once one understands that the orgasm, while pleasant for a few seconds, leaves a hangover that takes about 2 weeks to subside and that one really has no reason to chase them, it opens a door to an easy path to a life without PMO. I'm quite sure I'm on my last reboot ever.

    I started jacking off at age 9. Now I'm 36. If I can kick my porn and masturbation habit of 27 years, so can you.
     
  15. hnh7u651

    hnh7u651 Fapstronaut

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    Why don't you try realizing how lucky you are? You think this is a big fuckin' problem that you can't stop whacking off? I'd suggest you try imagining yourself with a real problem; like having no food to eat, being born with the Zika virus, or loosing your son overboard while trying to flee a war torn country?! Think about how pitiful you are sitting there with your shiny laptop computer. You should be ashamed of yourself, put this in perspective and wake up already.
     
  16. Yesodi

    Yesodi Distinguished Fapstronaut

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    The length of one's "streak" is not the only thing that counts! Depending on what exactly is your motivation for abstaining, there might be many other ways to view/measure success.

    For example, even if you are resetting every two weeks, that still means that you are clean for 13 out of every 14 days, or 92.9% of the time! :D

    Surely that should not be dismissed as a "worthless" accomplishment!
     
  17. zadvanceppa

    zadvanceppa Fapstronaut

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    That is an interesting way of looking at it!! Good point.
     
    Yesodi likes this.
  18. Napav

    Napav Fapstronaut

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    First thing I checked, after reading your post is whether you are reading and responding to the replies.. and I found that you are reading..
    It's great that you are still here.
    See so many people care for you...
    Everyone here wants each of us to win.
    Keep this in mind.... its good.. Actually great that you are in the battle fighting than to simply surrender..
    We will surely win by God's grace.
    We will..
     
    Judicious 7 likes this.
  19. Steven Goodale

    Steven Goodale Fapstronaut

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    That really made my day.
     
    Yesodi likes this.
  20. NooseAnchor

    NooseAnchor Fapstronaut

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    If you can't keep it up then a NoFap reboot should be an easy ride for you lol :D

    Just kidding, obviously, trying to make you smile in these tough times.
    First thing I notice is that you seriously need to cut out that negative and self-defeating self-talk. It only keeps you stuck where you are. You need to focus on the positive reasons you want to quit. You say that you want to be a well-adjusted adult who deals with his problems intelligently and efficiently. That's a good starting point. The question is, how bad do you really want to quit? Are you truly fed up with PMO? Why do you want to quit? Might wanna check out my new challenge about this process of shifting your mindset here. Also, I would like to ask you two questions:

    • When you say you've been struggling with this ever since the age of 11, do you mean PMO or do you mean that you've been trying to fight the addiction since back then?

    • How many times have you actually tried to quit and then relapsed after 14 days?

    You might not know this but 14 days hard mode is a lot more than the average new fapstronaut is capable of. So congrats on your past successes!

    If you truly didn't have any motivation to get better then you wouldn't have written this line! It's just what they say about suicide: "Jumpers don't call, and callers don't jump". Meaning, those who really want to kill themselves don't call a suicide hotline and talk about it (or do something similar), and those who do talk about it don't actually end up committing suicide. Transferred onto your case, I would say you definitely do want to get better! And desperately so! You want to have friends again, you want to have that motivation back, you want to be an adult and take care of your problems, and NoFap is the way to achieving these goals! Just hang in there! Look for an accountability partner to check in on each other daily, start writing a journal, and keep pushing forward. Those who make it to 30/60/90/120+ days were sometimes struggling up to 2 years or more until they got there. You need to get back up after every relapse and go on the next streak and the next streak. Eventually, you'll make it beyond 2 weeks. And if all else fails, here is some unconventional advice: Ride the wave of PMO until it swallows and drowns you. Let PMO tear you down and burn you out until you are truly fed up with it. Then return to NoFap. Sometimes we have to surrender and let something completely and uttlery consume, devour and spit us out again before we're ready to walk away from it. I do not recommend this, though, and sincerely hope you get out before this has to happen. After all, you are aware of the fact that you suffer from an addiction. That's the first step toward recovery. A "true addict" doesn't even realize that he has a problem.

    Last but not least: This forum is all about support, so how could you possibly think, feel and say that you have none at all? We are brothers and sisters in arms on here, fighting the same battle. Very few are capable of ending an addiction alone by themselves. This is not a personal deficiency of yours.
     
    Judicious 7 likes this.

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