I can't even stay hard while watching porn

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction' started by pacopico, Nov 9, 2017.

  1. pacopico

    pacopico New Fapstronaut

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    I am 19 years old and I cant even keep an erection while watching porn. I started masturbating at age 10 without looking at anything, just thoughts. Then at age 12 I started to look at picture on the internet while masturbating ( bikini photos, celebrities, etc.) At age 13 I started to look at nude photos and then started watching hardcore porn.

    At this age I could get and keep an erection instaneously. I could get one without touch or even really thinking about anything sexual, it just worked. They were fully hard and great. I would masturbate a lot, upwards to 8 times a day, and edging every session for a long time, often for hours before cumming. I just couldn't stop. I wouldn't even lose my erection after cumming at this age it would take a few minutes for it to subside. I could masturbate like 3 times in a row without losing an erection.

    I wouldn't watch hardcore porn very frequently at these ages because I didn't want to get in trouble. I would look more at non sexual nude photos and bikini photos.

    At the age of 17 I started to watch hardcore porn more frequently, but not very often because I had read that porn weakens erections. At this age I started to do penis enlargement excersices such as jelqing, stretching, clamping and kegels. It's was at this time, I started to experience extreme erectile dysfunction. I had no ability to get a full erection without touch and my erections would die within seconds if I stopped physical stimulation.

    Once I started do kegels, I started to have erectile dysfunction. After months of doing penis enlargement, I decided to stop because I felt I was damaging myself, this was a little over year ago.

    I would watch hardcore porn intermittently.

    I haven't had morning wood in 2 years, I don't get spontaneous erections and can't keep an erection without physical stimulation. Even with all this my libido is extremely high, I feel the desire for sex constantly, but am still a virgin. I am very attracted to girls I see in real life. But this is destroying my confidence.

    When I masturbate it is very hard to get an erection, extremely hard to keep it without physical stimulation. Sometimes it's better then other times but always pretty bad. There has been many times where I would watch the most hardcore porn possible and not be able to get an erection, and if I did it was because I was thinking intensely about sex, watching porn and masturbating as hard as I can. And then the second I stopped touching it would die immediately.

    My penis is circumcised and quite large. Another problem is that it doesn't move very much at the base when hard, so it is physically impossible for me to get a full erection while wearing pants. I can't flip it up against my stomach or put it to the side or down my leg. When erect my penis just goes straight out, which can't happen when I wear pants. So when I am able to get semi hard without physical stimulation, which is not all the time, it just gets semi hard. Just as much as can fit in my pants, even when I don't wear pants.

    I have been on nofap for half a year now. My longest streaks on hardmode have been 27 days, 21 days, and 17 days (which I just relapsed with porn on). Whenever I relapse my erection is much stronger for the first few sessions, but still can't get fully hard without physical stimulation. And as I continue to masturbate my erection quickly become terrible again.

    I've been to a urologist for a varicocele in my left testicle and for this ed problem. He said he thought the ed was all in my head, but did not run any tests on me at all. My symptoms are like a veinous leak, maybe caused by penis enlargement excercises.

    I am really worried that I have physical damage.

    I eat extremely healthy and workout. I am very lean and healthy looking. I gain muscle quick and have facial and body hair, so I don't think low testosterone is a cause.

    I know this is a long post, but I have been living with this problem for a little over 2 years now and I feel very depressed, it kind of ruined me as a person. I am desperate for help, if anyone has any opinions on this please share with me. Thank you all.
     
  2. Plutonium

    Plutonium Fapstronaut

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    This is one of the saddest stories I've read on this forum. You could be the Poster Child for internet porn addiction. What a scourge internet porn is on society...

    I have two questions on your situation:

    i) You say your erection is near perpendicular to your body. Has it always been this way - even when everything worked just fine?

    ii) What first got you into doing enlargement exercises and what were these exercise? You say your penis is quite large, and I would suspect that it is that way due to nature rather than these exercises.
     
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  3. pacopico

    pacopico New Fapstronaut

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    i) I'm pretty sure it's always been very perpendicular, but I don't think it's always been so rigid at the base and hard to move

    ii) I got into enlargement excercises because I was a very lonely person and I came across these excercices on the internet and decided to do them as self improvement. I've always been quite large, so i didn't even need to do this at all. I did this because I had nothing else to look forward to, it was just another thing to fill the void. I highly regret doing these excercices because I'm sure they can cause physical damage. I listed them in the post, it was jelqing, stretching, clamping and kegels. You can look them up on the internet.
     
  4. Plutonium

    Plutonium Fapstronaut

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    Just looked them all up. And there was I thinking I'd seen just about everything...

    My advice to you is quite simple:

    i) Leave your penis the hell alone. Give the poor fellow a break. God knows he deserves it, and he'll be fine
    ii) Who you are and what you do in life are far more important than your penis. Focus on action and doing and becoming. Be active - learning, moving, lifting, running, meeting, talking etc - and you'll forget your problems because you'll be too busy growing
    iii) Once you have a girlfriend (and don't rush - it's not a race!) you can revisit your penis. Only then...

    Good luck! Now go and do something that has absolutely nothing to do with your penis (or porn). Even if it's just a walk around a nearby park. And then keep on doing... eat, do stuff, sleep. Repeat. No penis. Got it!?! ;)
     
    Hopefulgirl, Ghost79 and pacopico like this.
  5. Such Small Hands

    Such Small Hands Fapstronaut

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    Tough, man. When you're young and PMO gets you...the recovery process is excruciatingly difficult. I'm going through it and sometimes I don't even know if I can pull through.

    Seeing how it has affected your body and behavior...I'm sorry. I can relate to some extent. It isn't easy and I don't envy your position. But you're on here for a reason and I believe you can keep extending that streak of sobriety because you DO HAVE the necessary willpower inside you.

    You got this. Stay strong.
     
    pacopico likes this.
  6. PeterJL

    PeterJL Fapstronaut
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    pacopico-

    TLDR; there is nothing wrong with your penis.

    One of the ways that our addictions try to trick us into watching more porn is by telling us that we have a serious problem and the only way to cure it is to masturbate.

    ED is when you cannot get an erection, at all. Porn induced ED is when you can't get an erection from touching yourself or having a partner touch you without watching porn.

    If you need to touch yourself to get an erection while watching porn. That is normal. It just means porn is losing its grip over you. Good. This is no reason to believe you would have problems getting it up for a wife or long-term girlfriend. Especially because a wife or long term girlfriend WILL in fact, touch you. You don't have to rely on visual.

    As far as penis enlargement goes: I've been jelqing since before you were born. I have an enlarged vein on the top of my penis from PE, probably similar to your varicocele. Unless it hurts, this is cosmetic. Sex with my wife is still great and not a problem.

    Most PE-related injuries go away with time (and hot wraps using either a warm towel or rice sock heated in a microwave- be careful not to OVERHEAT the wrap or sock) if you take a break from the exercise. That's not to say that it is impossible to get serious injuries from PE- that is a risk- but if you aren't doing it anymore and your doctor has already examined you, I wouldn't worry that you have some secret injury (unless there is pain you haven't mentioned).

    Of the exercises you mentioned, I would look at clamping as the most dangerous and likely to create injury. Although the injury would be bruising at the point the clamp is applied or strained or torn ligaments. Stretching can
    also lead to strained or in extreme cases torn ligaments if you overdo it. Jelqing can lead to varicocele or red spots, which are mostly cosmetic, although I suppose more serious injuries are possible.

    The biggest jelqing danger for fapstronauts is that it basically is masturbation. I have accidentally cum while jelqing, and it can definitely be a trigger for a PMO session.

    Kegels are actually exercising a muscle, so you can strain or pull them just like any other muscle, but the risk of more long term injury is low. And of the four exercises, kegels are the only ones I have actually heard doctors recommend. This was for my wife when she was pregnant as part of the preparation class, but the doctors mentioned they are beneficial for men as well. If anything, I would think kegels alone should help with ED (I am not a doctor).

    The other thing I would mention about kegels is that they aren't masturbatory at all. In fact, kegeling is an effective method to prevent ejaculation or to drain an unwanted erection.

    With any sort of penis enlargement exercise, we need to acknowledge the mere fact that we want to do it in the first place indicates we have some degree of penis body dysmorphia. I *blame* porn for that. PE is just a symptom. My theory is that it is best to lean in to the symptom, learning to PE safely and in a non-masturbatory way, while running from the disease. But I could be wrong.
     
  7. kropo82

    kropo82 Fapstronaut

    I am not a doctor (well, not a medical one). I am nervous about this too. Definitely do a no-PMO reboot, as others suggest, possibly quite a long one, say 180 days. But I would also push harder on your doctor. Can you insist that he or she runs the tests to prove that there is nothing physical behind your erectile dysfunction?
     
  8. PeterJL

    PeterJL Fapstronaut
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    I'm sorry to repeat myself here, but I think it is worth repeating; if you CAN get an erection (and it is clear from the OP that you can), then you do not have ED. It is easy to fall into the trap of masturbating just to prove to yourself you still can.

    I think part of the problem may be that you are a virgin who is getting his information about what sex looks like from porn, and how your penis worked at the height of puberty when you were flush with hormones.

    Just like porn presents an unrealistic image of the *size* of members, it also presents an unrealistic view of how erections occur and what sex looks like. Porn stars take ED drugs and film multiple takes, so it appears that the actors go from corny dialogue to full erection as soon as they decide to take their pants off. You never see the actors working up an erection or losing their erections, even for a second, because that is edited out. And you *see* erections much more often in porn then you will *see* your penis during real sex. Real sex does not usually involve waving your penis around, especially after sex has begun. That is for the cameras.

    In real life, when you find an actual living, breathing person that you want to have sex with, she (or he) will probably not expect or even want that. It's okay if your penis isn't hard until after you have kissed for a while, for example. And you don't need to worry about maintaining your erection when you are not physically touching yourself, because it is literally impossible to have real sex without your partner physically touching you the entire time.

    I hope that helps.
     
  9. DLambert

    DLambert Fapstronaut

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    Nofap - changed my life. I often feared sex because I knew I would not get an erection. Also, I started my course of V**gra whilst not fapping.
    Had rock erections that lasted. Does exactly what it says, however one misconception is that you take a v** pill and you go rock hard straight away, no. Takes about 30-40 mins till you can have sex, you then have to get aroused and then you erection will stay.
    [​IMG]
     
  10. 5adn8m8

    5adn8m8 Fapstronaut

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    Body is an amazing phenomenon and can almost heal any disease. You are eating healthy and you are working out but what are you doing for your mental health? Stress and worrying too much can really affect your situation. I think daily meditation and writing journals can really help in your case.
    Trust your body and just stick to your abstinence... Signs of healing will emerge slowly but surly.
    Good luck mate. Hope this helps.
     
    SREENII likes this.
  11. domasfernandez

    domasfernandez Fapstronaut

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    Hello bro did you already cure your Ed?
     
  12. kropo82

    kropo82 Fapstronaut

    I didn't have ED.
     
    domasfernandez likes this.
  13. Waitinggame

    Waitinggame Fapstronaut

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    So I found this forum and hope I can get some feedback. I am 30 years old, single, and I realized about a month ago something wasn’t right down there. I too have been jerking off excessively to porn for a while and then one week noticed that my erections got weaker and I could barely get and stay hard. I lost my morning wood too and didn’t get one for like a week and a half straight! Normally I’d get erections instantly from watching porn or seeing someone attractive or thinking about someone attractive. I also use to get a lot of random erections while at work but that also changed. I was also very very worried because of the ED that I have been experiencing.

    I was also very stressed and depressed for a couple weeks and getting little to no sleep. I stay active by lifting weights in the gym and also cardio and I try to eat healthy as best I can. I went to my doctor for this and he did a bunch of blood tests on me that tested my testosterone, kidney function, blood count levels etc; all came back normal and he said I shouldn’t worry about it. He also told me to get more sleep.

    fast forward to today. I decided a month ago to try NoFap. Since I have been doing this and getting more adequate sleep I have gotten my morning wood back a little. It has happened a few times since then which is great. Sometimes not as strong as before and sometimes as strong as it was before this ED. I have also gotten wet dreams three times since last week. And twice before that. Last week it was A LOT and thick. Last two times not as much came out but still a little thick. I have also experienced getting erections without touching myself at work and at home but not as often as before.

    As I’m only on month 1 with NoFap i hope I continue to see more and more improvements though. If I happen to be on twitter and see a naked pic or a random porn video by accident normally, I’d get aroused instantly and also get an erection in that instant. But now when I see those things I get aroused still but no erection, which is sad. I’m trying not to get depressed and so far so good. Any feedback welcomed.
     
    5adn8m8 likes this.
  14. 5adn8m8

    5adn8m8 Fapstronaut

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    Many guys here have managed to cure their PIED by abstaining from PMO. The truth is full recovery might take up to 6 months or in some cases a year. However, full recovery IS possible. I believe you can do it! There will be some setbacks but you will get there eventually if you actually commit to your recovery. Speaking of commitment, I have been trying to leave this addiction for 3 years to no avail. I tried everything and nothing seemed to work. A member of this community introduced me to SPAA. It's a twelve-step program for sex and porn addicts. I know you might think that it's not for you! So did I and I was really skeptical at first. But after the first meeting, everything changed for me. I've been fighting this addiction tooth and nail and hadn't gone beyond 20 days of sobriety in a long time. However, this time with the help of other fellows of the group and the program I am getting really close to 90 days...The truth is that we can't do it alone. I know you know that cause you're already here, seeking help. This website can help but there's a limit to that. We need a genuine connection to beat this addiction. You know what they say "the opposite of addiction is connection". If you want to attend one of our meetings, which are held online and you can join us regardless of what part of the world you live in, shoot me a direct message. I'll be more than happy to discuss the details with you. Peace brother. I hope you have a successful rebooting.
     
  15. Pepe45

    Pepe45 New Fapstronaut

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    El libro de Tony Robins poder sin limites es muy bueno
     
  16. Waitinggame

    Waitinggame Fapstronaut

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    Not worried relapsing honestly because as I said, I’ve been getting wet dreams. I think whenever I build up too much my body will just release it. And I am dreaming about sex when it happens so it’s like I get a nocturnal release.

    just gotta wait it out I guess. I still get random erections here n there and you to this morning got a lil morning wood. My rando erections are as a result of my mind wandering though and not from seeing porn or porn pictures. I kinda miss having erections just from seeing something or someone arousing tho.
     
  17. ColinCornish

    ColinCornish New Fapstronaut

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    Try to refrain from masturbation for a while and also find porn from which you will be excited. Maybe you just need a real girl already, that's all. I understand that watching porn is very convenient and you do not need to worry that a girl can get pregnant even if you use contraceptives. But real sex is much more pleasant and gives more pleasure. I used to watch a lot of porn and masturbate a lot, but I realized that masturbation is monotonous and boring, so I decided to do my appearance and find a good girl with whom I will be good.
     
    Last edited: Jan 2, 2021
    Waitinggame likes this.
  18. FoundTheFreedom

    FoundTheFreedom Fapstronaut

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    I'm not understanding. Are you encouraging him to watch porn?
     
  19. Waitinggame

    Waitinggame Fapstronaut

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    Yeah I was wondering lol. But I think he meant refrain from masturbation and also refrain from Porn that normally gets me excited. And I have no urge to masturbate at all. The thing is, for quite some time I mentally acknowledged that I was addicted to masturbating and wanted to stop but couldn’t voluntarily do so. So when my flatline happened and I started NoFap I just don’t find the urge to masturbate anymore. I don’t get hard from porn anymore, even if I see it. But I am still getting morning wood, two days ago I got really hard like normal without touching myself at all because I was horny. It didn’t stay up though but yeah, I think I’m done with jerking off for good this time.
     
  20. FoundTheFreedom

    FoundTheFreedom Fapstronaut

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    I was confused because he said, "find porn from which you will be excited". I didn't get from that, that he wanted you to refrain from this porn. I will give him the benefit of a doubt. Glad you translated. Yeah, I've been doing nofap for over 70 days and I no longer have any urge to masturbate. That could be from my age (I'm 59) or something leftover from prostate cancer surgery. I'm not sure but the longer I'm away from porn the more the urges lessen. I woke up this morning with morning wood, something I haven't had for almost a decade. I was a bit shocked. I left it alone and it went down eventually. Maybe I have had PIED. Maybe I'm not impotent from the surgery. We'll see.
     

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