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I cried for the first time on NoFap - first time in 1 year of NoFap!

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by LoyalKnight, Aug 1, 2017.

  1. Aug 1, 2017 #1
    LoyalKnight

    LoyalKnight Fapstronaut

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    I am not able to enjoy life for around 5 days.

    My first days of my current streak were marked by many urges, but I defeated them all. For 5 days, I just cannot enjoy life anymore. Everything lost its joy. Playing games, reading, watching movies, even the gym and even talking with people. Everything. I just feel so empty right now, so drained, so lifeless.

    This is not my first streaks. I am doing NoFap for nearly one year, and I reached 2 times +50 days, but I never had such a empty and sad feeling that I have right now.

    Today in the morning I even cried, for my first time during NoFap. I cried because I realized that I destroyed my life for the last 6 years, I cried because I f*cked up so many relationships, and never took a chance if I got one. I cried because I objectified women as objects to wank to for around 6 years. I cried because I preferred pixels more than real life interaction with females. I cried because I lost so much time on PMO. I cried because my vigor and willpower was non-existent for the time I PMO'd.

    I am sure that today was a valuable lesson for me. I may not be able to enjoy life, but you can be sure that I am determined, with my full strength, not to give in. I would rather not enjoy life for 1 more year, instead of going back to my old habit.

    I hope that you all will realize this at one point as well, that nothing can justify PMO. Nothing. I feel so liveless, without energy and motivation right now, that PMO would like to tell me that fapping will make everything better.

    I know the truth, though.
     
    LoyalKnight, Aug 1, 2017
    LoyalKnight, Aug 1, 2017
    #1
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  2. Aug 1, 2017 #2
    Phoenixfeathers

    Phoenixfeathers Guest

    There's nothing wrong with crying. There's nothing wrong with feeling emotions. It's what makes you human, and this is what PMOing steals from you. Feeling regret for your past is a good thing. It means you acknowledge your past mistakes. You mourn them. But in time, you will move on. Your past, and your willingness to change, is what makes you the person you are today. Someone who has the strength and the courage to make changes for the better. You reached over 50 days twice. That's really good! I've not hit anywhere near that yet! Do not feel ashamed of your past. Absolutely no human being is perfect, and you'll be surprised just how many issues other people have, when you get to know them. Your determination shows a strong spirit and a sound mental attitude. Keep going! PMO is an easy trap to fall into, and we're told that's it 'normal', in our society. But our society is f*cked up, and that's the truth.

    I hope your depression lifts soon. Doctors always say give it two weeks, and if you don't feel better then, then you should seek medical help. Sometimes the cause is an underlying medical issue, but sometimes it's situational and just a result of thoughts/realizations and external factors. I'm guessing it's just a result of your thoughts about your past, and your feeling of regret. Like I said, don't be ashamed. Take care.
     
    Phoenixfeathers, Aug 1, 2017
    Phoenixfeathers, Aug 1, 2017
    #2
    LoyalKnight and plant goodness like this.
  3. Aug 1, 2017 #3
    LoyalKnight

    LoyalKnight Fapstronaut

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    My Journal
    @coffeecat Thank you, awesome members like you keep this community going and make our path out of PMO way easier. I will hold on, whatever the cost is, I can assure that to you.
     
    LoyalKnight, Aug 1, 2017
    LoyalKnight, Aug 1, 2017
    #3
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  4. Aug 1, 2017 #4
    plant goodness

    plant goodness Fapstronaut

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    plant goodness, Aug 1, 2017
    plant goodness, Aug 1, 2017
    #4
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