I did a huge mistake!! Please help!!

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction' started by Naruto94, Aug 29, 2018.

  1. Naruto94

    Naruto94 Fapstronaut

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    Hello.I think I made a horrible mistake.During my recovery from porn I had a lot of relapse but my last one which I was a 7 day journey ended with going to an escort.I am very disappointed in me.I never wanted to do this rhings but I don't know I felt like I can't control myself.Please help! I don't know how to control this! :(
     
  2. lovebeach

    lovebeach Fapstronaut

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    Its all up to you, I did a mistake today ,started watching ladys in a dating site, my dopamin levels went crazy, you need to watch them as a enemy. I did not masturbate or edge
     
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  3. Bman101

    Bman101 Fapstronaut

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    Hello Naruto, I have read your first post and I can sympathise with you since I also am studying medicine and have been afflicted with the same unfortunate plague (porn for 10-11 years). Not all is lost, I can only describe you what has made me decide I want to give this lifestyle up. I can't say it all worked out from the moment I decided, but nonetheless maybe you will think about this when trying again. My first 2 month streak happened when I noticed I couldn't keep my boner during s with my ex. I thought that since I had no problem getting a boner and maintaining it whilst watching porn, the problem must have been that bloody pmo.

    After the brake up and constant battles with how I tried to study harder yet couldn't focus for a long perioud of time or keep my interests high enough to actually finish the job ( I also couldn't retain the information as fast as my peers would) I decided I would end it for good. The constant thought of how I have no friends, no bond, not even a girlfriend anymore... the humility I felt with PIED and how the screen was still taunting me into returning back to it woke up a flame in me. If you constantly think of how bad this accursed habit changed your life, that should make you wish from the core of your being to end it.

    What helped me also was getting out of my comfort zone, when I was in highschool, I enjoyed working out so that's exactly what I did. I started doing push ups home and then after one month I went to the gym at least 2-3 times a week ( now I go 5-6). I've heard that meditating has also helped a lot of people so maybe it is worth getting into it!

    Whenever you get the urge or get demotivated as to how hard life gets and want to pmo, return to this site or go into and take a shower, do push-ups, pop up your phone and play a freaking game, anything to keep you away from this, go outside for a walk, run, whatever you want BUT DO NOT FALL INTO YOUR BRAIN'S TRAP.

    Maybe this will help you as well.

    https://yourbrainonporn.com/erectile-dysfunction-and-porn

    You can do it, dattebayo! That is your nindo, your ninja way, go make us proud, forge ahead on the path you've drawned for youself and be the great person we know you are!
     
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  4. Naruto94

    Naruto94 Fapstronaut

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    Thanks a lot Bman101,that was amazing.To be honest your comment made my eyes wet.I will never give up just like naruto taught me :)
     
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  5. Bman101

    Bman101 Fapstronaut

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    Glad I could be of service! :)
     
  6. fireblaster

    fireblaster Fapstronaut

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  7. Yuh skrt

    Yuh skrt New Fapstronaut

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    I’ve gone through this and currently am now after relapsing after just twelve hours. But regardless you must stay strong and be on guard, a lot of the times i relapsed was because i gave in and looked porn saying to my self im only looking and won’t do anything, but it never helped in the slightest and only made it worse leading to my relapses. You must stay strong and do not let you urges take over, you can do it bro. I’d recommend if you start feeling urges perhaps read the news, a book, or anything to get your mind focused on something else. Good luck with your recovery, you can make it man!
     
  8. MovingOnFromThePast

    MovingOnFromThePast Fapstronaut

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    Two years ago, I had to tell the truth. That truth caused my 5 year relationship to end. She eventually left me nine months later. Shame, guilt and regret is what I live with. Never learn a lesson with regret. I cried when I woke up, I cried in the shower, and I cried before I went to sleep. I would cry 5 days out of the week for at least 9 months straight. I do not over exaggerate about me crying alot because it is the sad truth. It felt like someone died. Its been over a year since she left and I still cry but not as often as before. I only went out 5-6 times to socialize out of the whole year. I stayed in my room everyday like it was prison. Dreading about the past, over and over . A nightmare that wouldn't end.


    Suicide was on my mind for months. I just couldn't stop thinking. I couldn't stop replaying every bad moment. Porn and games was the only time where I didn't have to think about anything. Everyday I would play games, watch porn, and cry. I was a living zombie. Two years of true depression is something where I wouldn't want anyone to have.

    I hit a breaking point in my life. I no longer want to dread about the past, in order for me to stop thinking about the past is to stop PMO . I no longer live in a fantasy because in reality, we live in the moment, and what we do in that moment will affect our future. Make a bad decision now better expect another bad decision later. Talk negative to yourself now best believe you'll say it again later.

    You and I and everyone else live this life in this world. There's nothing wrong with the world but we choose to make it a cold world. There'snothing wrong with my computer but I made poor decisions on my computer. Everyday is a new day and literally anything can happen. I might just sin the next day, who knows, but if i do Iwillremember about my shameful past and once I come to my senses (after you pmo) that depression will come quickly. It's so painful that im willing to give up anything to not feel that pain again.


    Someone on NOFAP asked , " what do you desire?"

    My desire is to not feel that shame, regret and guilt. My desire is to not dread about the past that I caused my 5 year relationship to end. That's why I NOFAP.


    Tell me brother, what do you desire?
     
  9. MovingOnFromThePast

    MovingOnFromThePast Fapstronaut

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    I do believe you brother. I take NOFAP not a challenge but changing lifestyle. I don't count how many days of nofap, I only care about what happens today.

    #movingonfromthepast
     
    Last edited: Aug 29, 2018
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  10. Naruto94

    Naruto94 Fapstronaut

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    thanks everyone for the support it means a lot :D
     
  11. Bman101

    Bman101 Fapstronaut

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