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I hate how depression makes you see things they way they really are...

Discussion in 'Self Improvement' started by Avenging Marmoset, Sep 7, 2019.

  1. Avenging Marmoset

    Avenging Marmoset Fapstronaut

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    Longtime depresison sufferer here, though it's mostly been under good control for years, I still get my spells even though SR has overall helped. One thing I hate about depression is that, when I'm having a spell, it really makes me strip situations and things down to the bare minimum, and when you look at most of those things, they ain't too pretty. This of course just exascerbates the depression, but I don't think I'll be able to stop doing this-or find a way to not do it-until I discover what is the truth...the way I see those things in their stripped-down form or the way they are when I'm not depressed? There are no easy answers, but if I discover the nature of this phenomenon, I can better deal with it.

    Example: where I hang out is a cafe that attracts wuite the crowd of people in the evenings. It's boisterous, loud and pretty fun. And as with anyplace that you get men and women together, there is going to be flirtation and the enjoyment of interaction with the opposite sex in the air. This is ok. That is what keeps the human race going. There is nothing wrong with that. When I am not depressed, I too hang out there and do some flirting. But maybe when I am depressed, I don't see it for what it really is, because last night when I was in a mood, I was talking to a friend there and blurted out (no one else but them heard this) "This place is just another worthless alcoholic fuck scene where the women won't even treat yuou like you exist unless they want to suck your dick, everyone else gets instantly friendzoned, and the clueless guys are losers. They aren't taking any classes, they can't even put on a clean T-shirt before they come here."

    Another: When I was out doing a few errands the oter day, I started looking around at how, even though it was a mere 73 degrees out, everyonen had their windows up and their gas-sucking A/C obviously running full blast. I thought "How could people smart enough to pull in the kind of money that it takes to drive a massive new pickup around just to prove how manly they are still be such pussies that they can't handle what amounts to room-temperateure weather? They say they;re worried about their hair? Put on a trucker hat, you fucking retard rednecks."

    Now, let me remind you that this post is not about male/female dynamics (at least not in the larger sense) or where I hang out (I'm talking about that one place and what's going on there, not anywhere else, nor am I loking for advice on where to hang out, but thanks.) or whether it's okay to run your A/C when it's 60 out or not. That's not the issue I wish to discuss; It's about how those of us with depression tend to see things this way when we're depressed. Imena, how can I sit there having anormal conversation with a woman at this place when I'm feeling oka, when any other time I'm going to be thinking "Maybe if you'd stop hooking up with serial felons, your romantic life would be better." Iguess I just loose all tolerance for idiocy wnhen I'm depressed. And yes, I too, I am sure, do stupid things even though I try to live my life in a way that makes sense and minimizes this kind of behavior, To most people, this would never occur at all. And this is not about me being self-asessing, it's about why I see the idiocy in this world when depressed, and why I don't when I'm not, and my wondering " "Well, which way is it? Is it the way I see it when I'm depressed or the way I see it when I'm feeling normal?"
     
  2. I see things the same way. That's why I have a deep anger at almost all times. That's why I'm not really fun to be around with. And like you, it just strikes me and angers me that in most people's reality there seem to be no idiocy in it all.
     
  3. lolos

    lolos Fapstronaut

    Depression doesn't make you see things the way they really are, it makes you think you see things the way they really are. This goes for any emotion you feel, it will tinge the way you view reality, and most of the time you will think the way you see things right now is the way they really are.

    Even if you are correct right now, it is not a useful way of thinking, it will not be conductive to your life. I know you may think that it would be wrong to think anyway, that you would be doing yourself an intellectual disservice by thinking anything other than the 'truth' in order to make yourself happy. I used to think the same way, my psychologist would tell me I need to move past the deaths of loved ones and think of them in a more positive light, but I thought that I would be lying to myself and in my head that was worse than anything at the time.

    You are not lying to yourself if you try to see the good in things rather than looking at the negative. So what if the women are shallow and the men are clueless? Don't brood over at just because that's the way things are. That is human nature, nothing you can do will change it. Accept it and start working out, put on a clean T-shirt and a smile when you go there and you will stand out over all of the other guys. Who gives a fuck if people like to use their aircon? It doesn't make them retarded, they just like the temperature to be a certain way.

    Some people say anger is the result of expectations of people not meeting reality. Lower your expectations. Realise the world doesn't work in rational ways, that people do stupid things, that they are governed by instincts that evolved thousands of years ago. You will be much happier. Godspeed.
     
  4. Have you ever considered that perhaps both perceptions are equally correct and both equally incorrect.
    You're getting at the heart of perception here and you asked in a forum for perspective so here is one for you.
    YOUR perception of the world is equally true and untrue at all times.
    Wtf does that mean?
    It means that the lens of your world, the emotions and thought processes that are behind how you see things at any given moment, are at all times correct and false.
    They are correct as far as your world is concerned in that moment. Because your experiencing it, reflecting it into your reality and simultaneously feeding it.
    It’s incorrect in “totality” because what you perceive of Johnny BlowShmoe at any given moment can be completely different than what another sees of him AND could be even further from the actual truth of the matter.

    Title: I Hate How Depression Makes You See Things The Way They Really Are.

    IS IT how things really are? Or is it how YOU think they are.
    ^^
    I know that’s basically what your asking. So the main thing to see here is your persistent thoughts, the ones your identify with and feed are the ones that form themselves into your reality.
    Once you start seeing that, that each person is literally living in their own world of perception, you can stop identifying so strongly with what you think or how you assume and judge people just see that it really is all coming from inside you, not from “out there”.
    Thats at least my perception of it all.. ;)
     
    Optimum Fortitude likes this.
  5. This was the funniest post I read all day. You should read infrasapiens. lol. Love your mind. You could be comedian for real.
     
  6. Avenging Marmoset

    Avenging Marmoset Fapstronaut

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    Yeah well.except for that last guy who in himself is pretty funny, i thank you all for these thoughtful and deep replies. It's all good food for thought and i consider my question answered.
     
    Optimum Fortitude likes this.

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