I never had drugs. Never smoked. Didn't had alcohol either. Thought I am far away from any kind of addiction. It was only when I tried to get rid of 'cocktail of porn & masturbation', I understood the meaning of addiction. You know it is bad for you. It is against your values, still it pulls you like quicksand. In 2014, I made my first attempt to put a stop to it. I managed without it for 5 months but it pulled me back. Since then I have made several attempt to stop it but after 1 week, 2 weeks or 3 weeks, I again end up on the square-one. I have known my trigger: being alone & under stress - that pulls me back in the trap. My stress level has been high from last few weeks & I am alone in my house today. I have been slipping since morning but have managed to resist so far. Once pressed the 'Panic Button' also. I hope this time I will be stronger & will survive this moment of weakness.