I have very high standards

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by helloo1221, Oct 14, 2021.

  1. helloo1221

    helloo1221 Fapstronaut

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    Hello guys i have lost many oportunities for a relashionship because i have very high standards,i always find something that i dont like in a girl.I think porn has done this to me maybe i want one of these fake bodies and faces that porn shows us,plus i am a virgin so on my first relashionship i want to be with a very beautiful girl.What are your thoughts on that?.I want a relashionship,so i have to low my standards?
     
    Last edited: Oct 14, 2021
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  2. mentorr

    mentorr Fapstronaut

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    If I was a beautiful female seeking to date you, my first question would be: what do you have to offer?

    What are your high standards based on?
     
  3. helloo1221

    helloo1221 Fapstronaut

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    I am not selfish but i have to offer a lot,im a good looking guy more than average,for some reason i want the girl to be very beautiful for me to take action and of course a very good character
     
  4. modern milarepa

    modern milarepa Fapstronaut

    You need to change your standards. Extreme beauty to be the base of you liking a girl will only bring you trouble.

    There is more in a woman than looks, not dating ugly but not only thinking beauty it's all you need.
     
  5. mentorr

    mentorr Fapstronaut

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    But again: what do you have to offer? What does a lot mean? Why do you deserve a beautiful women?

    I think there is nothing wrong with wanting to date a beautiful woman, what man wouldn't. But it sounds as if you might be seeking to date a beautiful woman as a way to justify yourself.

    I think it might help to dig deep and really understand why it means so much to you.
     
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  6. modern milarepa

    modern milarepa Fapstronaut

    I say you have low standards not high standards because there plenty of beautiful women. You just need to see a plastic surgeon, born beautiful or to work out.

    Finding a loyal girl, with high values, with good management of her emotions and with beauty that is high standards and hard to find.

    "she's so ugly the only thing she has to offer is her beauty"
     
  7. GodWithin

    GodWithin Fapstronaut

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  8. helloo1221

    helloo1221 Fapstronaut

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    Thats it,i have never thought like that,i am a little afraid
     
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  9. helloo1221

    helloo1221 Fapstronaut

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    you are right,i didn't tell it that well,for me the most important thing is her character,i have said no to girls that are beautiful because they had a bad character
     
  10. helloo1221

    helloo1221 Fapstronaut

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    do you think guys i should put so much thought on just a relationship??,as i said before i havent been in a relationship.I want my first one be perfect,i know this is very very wrong
     
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  11. modern milarepa

    modern milarepa Fapstronaut

    Date you haven't even date and want to only focus on yourself?

    You learn to skate skating and about girls and relationships while being in one.

    Also dating you learn a lot about yourself, sometimes even more than being alone
     
  12. modern milarepa

    modern milarepa Fapstronaut

    You sound like his father
     
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  13. mentorr

    mentorr Fapstronaut

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    How old are you?
     
  14. helloo1221

    helloo1221 Fapstronaut

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    i am 21 years old at university
     
  15. helloo1221

    helloo1221 Fapstronaut

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    the problem is that i cant wait months for my development to keep living my life,i have relapsed many many times.I f i go with the logic to be better and then get in a relationship this mught take years if i keep relapsing
     
  16. GodWithin

    GodWithin Fapstronaut

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    Oh yes. I'm into my first relationship. Man, I wanted it to be perfect but it's just mess now.
    It takes a lots of talks, work and mainly and most importantly - NO HURRY! Take it slow, talk things over, get to know that someone and it will be alright!
     
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  17. Psalm27:1my light

    Psalm27:1my light Fapstronaut

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    So what if it takes years. Getting into a relationship while still in addiction will only make things worse and possibly destroy another person. Quit relapsing. A relationship is not going to fix you. Only you can get into recovery, a relationship will complicate it.
     
  18. helloo1221

    helloo1221 Fapstronaut

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    i dont think it will destroy it,i a very good man that respect and love women,the only bad thing that might happen during a relashionship because of porn is pied.I've been trying to quit relapsing 2 years now without getting in a relashionshing
     
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  19. helloo1221

    helloo1221 Fapstronaut

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    it might take 8 years from now to quit porn forever,i cant wait for the reboot my whole life so i will be able to have a relationship
     
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  20. Psalm27:1my light

    Psalm27:1my light Fapstronaut

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    No, pied is absolutely not the worse thing that happens to a relationship from porn addiction. A very good man who loves and respects women doesn’t masturbate to porn. A good man doesn’t use and objectify women, which is what pmo is.
     
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