I just came out to my girlfriend, and I'm seeking support

Hi folks,

Last night I came out as a porn addict to my girlfriend, Elle. I plan on asking her to marry me, but knew I wouldn't do that until I had put my addiction on the table.

It was a tearful conversation, but we are both committed to the relationship, and I am now more committed than ever to quitting porn.

I am looking for support for Elle. She has a lot of confusion and is feeling "ALL the emotions." I wonder if other partners could tell me of good places for partners (maybe, particularly women) to get support and info for this. Are these forums a good place for partners to get support?

Thank you for your advice and encouragement.

 

Thank you so much! I also saw yours and ronswanson's comments on my status, so thank you both for the support there.

I will talk to her about joining NoFap messaging you--thanks for extending that offer! I will also show her that website. I think it seems like a good one—after several years getting nowhere in 12-step I'm leery of anything that smacks too much of the coaddict/codependent model, so the trauma model seems like an interesting way of looking at things. I'm not sure she feels like a trauma victim from this, per se, and she's still committed to the relationship, but I think we're both still processing thoughts and feelings from my admission. She may discover she needs more support than she currently thinks she needs as she continues to process.

 

Thanks, DireMerl. She's a pretty awesome woman so I think she'd fit in with a pretty awesome bunch. I told her about the forum, and she may just join in.

 

Thanks for the support @TheWife! My gf, @lady_from_the_prairie, just joined nofap, so hopefully she'll see you around!