I just want to eliminate that useless habit (Masturbation)

I don't have a special reason like others.. Addictions, to increase the energy levels etc.
I did already 7 months of nofap. I was in 15 years old addicted to PMO. But as the age and my meaning in life became clear, The P got out of my life, and MO only left.
Which i will call it just as M (Masturbation) I "relapsed" after 7 months in a moment of weakness and feeling really bored, exhausted etc. Since then i stopped to believe in increased energy levels or addiction really. It didn't felt right, and i didn't felt any benefits. But it's just felt good not doing this old habit, since it's just doesn't suit me anymore. And i have and want to find a better meaning, and to have only one thing on my mind, which is my goals, i want to develop myself, and masturbation doesn't feel like i'm developing myself really. It feels like i'm saying to myself " I want to be better" And then i masturbate, it's like saying "I want to buy a car" and then the moment you got money you spend it in clothes or food etc. Just like that, thus i hate this habit.

I want to be better, i want to be stronger, resilient, and focused man. That is my reason. And masturbating isn't really fits there. It's like i'm cheating on myself thus bothering me a lot. No different than loving your gf/wife and then having sex with another woman. Doesn't make sense to me, thus i'm gonna break that habit.
I've tried to break that habit after that relapse, but i realized that the reason that i relapsed after 7 months, is because i stopped to believe that nofap has some benefit to me, and all of those superpowers. I realized that my reason was weak, and after that relapse it continued since i really didn't have a good and clear why.
And now i have. I just want to be better and stronger more than anything in this world, and i dont want to cheat myself anymore. It's useless and won't really get me anywhere. I take nofap again seriously as a way to become a better version of myself. It's still gonna be hard, it's a habit that i had for years. But i believe in my will power, and i believe that i'm strong enough to break that habit for good, just as i did with other habits in my life. I'm gonna destroy everything that gonna stop me for becoming better.

I wanted to make a post about it, because as i know myself, announcing about it, means that i'm serious about something. Took the time to make the decision to quit something or to do something new. I'm fully committed.
Thank you for those who read it.

 

Yeah keep going strong brooooo!

By the way, are you Japanese? Wish I could exchange language with you...

 

Thanks man.
No I'm sorry. I'm just a Japanese learner. Sorry to misguide you, it's just the website didn't let me choose my usual nickname i choose.
You learning Japanese as well?

 

yeah i'm just a beginner

 

I see. 頑張れー！
If you need any help with Japanese don't hesitate to ask me.
I'm not fluent, but I'm studying it seriously for two years by now. But I won't have much of a problem to help you with beginner stuff.