I masturbated today after 102 days

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by Deleted Account, Dec 12, 2017.

  1. Last night, I masturbated without porn for the first time in over 3 months and it felt good. However, I was bored today and I masturbated again. So basically I jacked off twice without porn in a 24 hour period.

    This is not my proudest moment. Unlike, last night I haven't felt great at all today. I been feeling super off, I went to the store with my roommate and I felt anxiety for no reason. Maybe, Im tripping but I feel like I fucked up by masturbating last night and setting a negative effect.

    I'm going to stay away from masturbating again, not saying that jacking off is the reason why I'm feeling this way but I felt a lack of energy and felt depressed.

    Even though I have gone 103 days without watching porn which is the real problem, I no longer felt proud of that number anymore. It's like the weirdest fucking feeling ever.

    Anyone else who masturbate without porn feel this way?
     
  2. I think you shouldn’t have done that second one. If you’re a pmo addict, you’re body probably has some rebalancing to do and probably takes more time to recover than normal but it’s not normal right now.

    103 days is a little over 90 days and 90 days is kind of an arbitrary number, to me 90 days is not the beginning but it’s no where near the end. But that kinda depends per case. You’ll probably feel back to normal again in a week
     
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  3. fuck man, I really appreciate you posting that. 90 is definitely an arbitrary number for sure! I thought I'd be miraculously cured after 90 days, and were talking about a 15 year addiction. Part of me wishes I didn't masturbate period, but lesson learned my man!
     
  4. Yeah, it’s very arbitrary, 90 days is a very good start though!

    And you say 15 years? Oh yeah, 90 days is no where near the end for sure, but if you are gonna mo, at least give it a few weeks between each release, I think.

    Good luck!!
     
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  5. Oh and I read around and they say 90 days is more of making a new habit, but rather In this case the new habit is stopping the old one? Xd
     
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  6. thanks man, I appreciate it. Based on my mood, I know what not to do next time! It's a good way to learn
     
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  7. Yes, base it on your mood! Expect to lose some energy the second round when doing it that soon, are you willing to mo and to live like that for the next week? Can your mind/body take it?
    Good luck! Peace love positivty to you brother!
     
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  8. Supermarron

    Supermarron Fapstronaut

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    I did too after 46 days of no Pmo I was aiming for 40 now I know what that feels like so I’m aiming for longer this time. It did feel good but after ejeculating I get lazy for a while. I’m going for no PM for longer this time
     
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  9. Supermarron

    Supermarron Fapstronaut

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    I was aiming for 40 days 40 nights and had like an awakening moment at like 40 something day.
     
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  10. Supermarron

    Supermarron Fapstronaut

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    That’s one reason I did at 46 day and it seems I can store a lot in my balls, that’s another thing I learned. Next time I’m making love with my lover wishfully. That would be exiting storing for houndreds of days to make romantic love. That may happen I know if u have that energy stored in you to work hard and attract girls.
     
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  11. Supermarron

    Supermarron Fapstronaut

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    Use that energy to work hard and improve yourself and girls will come to you. After ejaculating physically u need rest don’t do to much in my opinion u might not do well compared to when u nofap for long time. I learned a lot during 46 days of nofap. and yesterday as I was watching porn I found out August Ames killed herself. Porn kills individuals man. Make love to your lover guys or work hard find meaning in life. Don’t waste energy jerking to porn people die in that field even big ones. Let’s find meaning in our lives with nofap and find real love.
     
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  12. honestly man, I just wish I didn't do it. It's like when you havent smoked cigarettes in a long time, and that first drag feels great initially then the second time you do it, it tastes weird.
     
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  13. I'm with you man, porn is fucking cancer for sure there's not 1 good thing I can say about it. For me, I don't need to chase girls, I been with my girlfriend for 2 years and she's extremely supportive and loving during this process. At the end of the day, it's a process and I need to realize I haven't watched porn for 103 days and keep going!
     
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  14. Supermarron

    Supermarron Fapstronaut

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    Nofap makes u know what u living for
     
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  15. Trips

    Trips Fapstronaut

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    It's a common reaction based on the goal you set for yourself. Your goal probably is to remain completely clean and in control. When you did it once after a long, long time because you felt like it, you were in control. If you did it again the next day, you lost control, which is why you felt like shit.

    Then again, it might be our own expectations hurting us to a degree. If you for example say to yourself it's fine to clean the pipes once in 30 days and you adhere to this, you haven't done anything wrong if it no longer affects your functioning.

    If you're a case like me, a heavy addict for long, long years, whose brain was completely rewired due to P and M, doing it even once a month seems risky. My brain is going to be rewiring for a long time and it can VERY easily slip into the old habit. I feel so much shame due to how long I was addicted, any slip is like an apocalypse to my mind. We're addicts, we have to live with it.
     
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  16. NoFap also makes you realize how much your missing out. The longer you go, the more enjoyable life becomes.
     
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  17. Supermarron

    Supermarron Fapstronaut

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    Exactly
     
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  18. Supermarron

    Supermarron Fapstronaut

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    I was aiming for 40 days and that became reality I know I can do longer and get more things done in my life
     
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  19. I'm totally with you man. I was a full blown addict, masturbation and porn has always gone together. The first time I did noFap I masturbated without porn and felt so guilty I reset the counter after day 10. Don't get me wrong I am extremely proud of myself to get to 103 days, however I don't need to masturbate I'm fine having sex as it is. I thought I could do it, but obviously the way I been feeling hasn't been worth it even though it's only been 1 day. The shitty part was, I had to change the counter to "without porn" but hey life goes on!
     
  20. Leo Star

    Leo Star Fapstronaut

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    when you relapsed, how was your sperm?
    yellow or white?
    how big was your sperm
     

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