(i need help)Story time

Discussion in 'Loneliness' started by ItsNotWorthIt, May 8, 2016.

  1. ItsNotWorthIt

    ItsNotWorthIt Fapstronaut

    hi, im back after months months months
    i found this community to be very supportive so i'm here again
    my ex online girlfriend contacted me 6months ago
    (cant believe its been 6 months again)
    (she left the day we decided to live together)
    now before 6months i was alone and i was fine with it
    had a job, good diet, lifting weights, etc... blablabla

    because i'm stupid i go 100% in anything that makes me happy which was her...
    even after the heartbreak she gave me i still went all in
    i gave up everything to make this "online relationship" work -.-
    i quit my job (was going to quit anyway but not so early) stopped lifting ate almost nothing just so i could spend all my time with her for 5months
    (we skyped every second... sleeping together on skype, waking up together on skype , EATING TOGHETER ON SKYPE PLAYING GAMES TOGETHER ON SKYPE EVERY MINUTE EVERY HOUR FOR 5MONTHS) i was happy...

    of course she wanted to live with me again... so we planned out everything AGAIN
    first she said in January i'll be ready as a new years resolution thing right 2016 woooow living together finally after almost 2 years (never have i met her in real life btw... just skype) so in January she gave and excuse to come later.
    i fell for it every week...so it got pushed very far away
    so on 7 fcking april 2016 she was "ready" she had the "ticket" and was going to go on the train the next day... i wake up on 8 aprill i look at skype and see the call has been ended i thought to myself: she probably woke up too late and didnt have time to tell me shes leaving... i check whatsapp and see that she blocked me
    i tried calling her number but kept on getting "busy" so i texted her a million times losing all my phone money... i freaked out bursting into tears hitting the wall smashing my table in etc... i calm down and think hm mby its a issue with her phone and whatsapp.
    so i decided to go to the train station where i was going to pick her up 3 hours from where i live.
    i arrive in the main station and waited for the train she was supposed to be on.
    while i was waiting i saw many guys with flowers in their hands waiting for their loved one... even a kid around 16 years old with his parents had flowers.
    after an hour of waiting the train arrives so i wait and hope she comes out...
    i look around and see the guys running to their girl... hugging, kissing, smiling.
    the 16 year old kid with his parents looking so happy together with his girl...
    everyone got out and my girl did not show up...

    there were 3 more trains coming from germany so i waited for them hoping that maybe she missed the first train... it was obvious that she would not be on any of the next trains but i waited anyway so after 6hours waiting for all the trains i decided to go back home...
    i was devastated, shocked, thinking how could i be so stupid for letting this happen to me again with the same girl... i gave up everything for someone i never held!
    so i got home and had a complete mental breakdown...
    drank all the alcohol i had...
    i wake up covered in my own puke in the bathroom.
    i look in the mirror and see cuts all over my body, my knuckles bleeding
    bruises on my legs and arms i go out the bathroom to see my flat completely destroyed.
    my tv smashed, my pc destroyed, my phone, bottles on the floor broken glass everywhere, chairs broken, table broken papers everywhere

    hm no clue where im going with this... so ye i had to buy allot of new stuff
    so im broke now but i have a new job tomorrow so thats good

    anyone else had a similar story? or knows how to deal with being alone?
    would like to read some stories... if you dont mind sharing
    im depressed been feeling like shit for a month now and its not getting any better... i didnt feel this way when she left me the first time but the second time really destroyed me
    cant sleep cant eat hard to go outside
    i'm probably gonna fck up my new job tomorrow

    being alone really fcking hurts... funny how when i was younger i never wanted anyone and now that ive tasted "love" i want nothing more than to have someone to share my life with

    anyway virgin for life is going to watch a movie while drinking a shit ton so i can fall asleep and feel awake tomorrow for my new job
    (hope to see some help/stories below) will be checking a few times
  2. Beingpure

    Beingpure Fapstronaut

    You can go to a website called 7cups.There are many volunteer therapists offer supports of specific topics. Free chats. I am a new user and so far the experiences are nice.Take good care ^^/
  3. Romanovx

    Romanovx New Fapstronaut

    Man it's ok. I know how you feel. I remember those days when I was looking at couples and was so jealous I wanted to die. I'm happy yo find a new job and that you go back on tract. And now my story: when I was in high school, I was a total looser. I had good grades, but I was alone. I had two friends, and we wasn't meeting after school. I couldn't talk with girls or even look them in the eyes. I was so afraid and ashamed of myself. After finishing school my mother went to live in France. Me and my sister stayed with my father. I didn't have any occupation. I was with my computer 12 hours a day. I faped 3-4 times a day. That when my nightmare began. I was depressed and had a hard ocd. I couldn't stop thinking. I couldn't eat, I couldn't sleep. I was a zombie. I wanted to die. I had a lot of luck and a psychiatrist saved my life. After few month of treatment I felt much better. I started to learn dentistry and now I'm in my forth year. In August i discovered nofap(with another username). I had a streak of 82 days(now I'm faping 2-3 time a month). During this time I found my beautiful girlfriend. She is my first serious girlfriend. We are now 7 month together. I also have 3 good friends from university, and we hang out together after university. My life changed drasticly. I was a dead man. Now I'm alive and happy. Everything can change. You just need to believe! Good luck man!
    Beingpure likes this.

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