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I need my brothers on earth!!

For Fapstronauts who are disciples of Christ

  1. Hey y’all, I just want to get this clear of what I’m dealing with in my life. For the past two weeks I have been relapsing none stop. I’ve had to lock my computer and most of my devices in a room because of my distrust of myself to stay faithful. Every night I’m attacked with an urge to masturbate, and a constant experience with doubt. For an example I always get a constant reminder in my mind that abstaining from masturbation will not let me experience the wonderful pleasure and happiness that masturbation gives me. Every day I watch videos on YouTube trying to get closure and a little peace of mind, especially when they mention how Nofap makes u attractive to girls, but the continuous doubt in my mind makes me think it’s fake and that I’ll never reach it. I feel greatly ashamed about this but God mentions to come boldly and state your problem. Well I have a foot fetish problem which to me is pretty mild compared to many others that deal with it. But for some reason my obsession with feet causes me to give in, and want to masturbate because of it by watching videos. So I’m asking if anyone could give me a great Christian answer of how to deal with this approach and fight these urges?
     
  2. The battle is in our minds, and that is where we must fight and win it.

    1. Freeze the unhelpful thought the moment you are aware it has entered your mind.
    2. Run the thought through the filter of the Spirit.
    3. Exchange the lie of the thought with the Truth of Christ.
    4. Exercise the Truth -- take positive action and stay focused on the truth and not the lies of PMO.

    This is the FREEdom process. More info here:
    https://docs.google.com/document/d/1zqVL11JjWICOHCRUDmqXr9TNC_gpb6yhRF1hKp-fxcc/edit

    This is what I have practiced for the last few years. Once it is your habit, you can do the entire thing in seconds. At first, as you are learning, it might take minutes or even hours to combat the thoughts and process them effectively. That is OK! If you keep working at it consistently, you will experience breakthrough.

    Once your thinking changes, your behavior will soon follow. Let me know if you would like to discuss further!
     
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  3. So how would u deal with finding your strength when every time an urge comes it seems like your body has more power than you?
     
  4. That's perfect!

    The urge comes. You:
    1. Freeze that thought. Do nothing. Sit on your hands if you must. Acknowledge the urge for what it is -- just an idea in your mind. It cannot compel you to do anything.
    2. Run that thought by the Spirit. Ask him to help you find the lie. One lie in this case is that the urge is so powerful you can do nothing about to resist it.
    3. Exchange the lie ("the urge is too powerful to defeat") with the Truth ("I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength" [Philippians 4:13]).
    4. Exercise that Truth! Focus your mind on the truth of reality in Christ. Fill your mind with that thought instead of the lie. The truth is that you *can* defeat the urge. Take action -- go for a walk, change venues, start some other activity, flee the temptation -- whatever you have to do!

    Whatever you choose to focus on is what will grow bigger and stronger in your mind. If you focus on the sin, it will grow and overwhelm you. If you instead focus on Christ and his power, that will grow and overwhelm you! :)

    The choice of what you focus on is yours.
     
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  5. You know I just wanna show my gratitude and thankfulness for you telling me this. Especially that scripture from Philippians 4:13, which Ive known since I was 6 years old.
     
    mrtumnus and Tao Jones like this.
  6. We are in this fight together! Let's continue to encourage one another! Please keep us posted on how you are progressing.
     
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  7. You can count on it, just pray I make it tonight and next week.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Sep 6, 2019
    Tao Jones likes this.
  8. I forget to ask this, but can you explain to me. Will I receive satisfaction and joy within myself and still find myself feeling pleasurable, and good as if I was still fapping, but instead meeting with girls and still having that same energy? I just wonder if in the future sex with my future wife would be better than the masturbation feelings that I feel right now.
     
  9. X.T.

    X.T. Fapstronaut

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    Matt, I have a suggestion for a mental exercise that has helped me in the past. When you gave a particular image or thought plaguing you, try visualizing it as an old school photo, then mentally put a lighter under it and let it burn away. Even in scripture, fire is a cleansing image and it is used to refine impure ore into precious metals, so I find this exercise helpful in disposing of unwanted thoughts and images.

    "Take away the dross from the silver,
    and the smith has material for a vessel;
    5 take away the wicked from the presence of the king,
    and his throne will be established in righteousness."
    Proverbs 25:4-5
     
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  10. The feelings you have now in PMO are false. They feel strong and good, but they are rooted in deception. They speak of intimacy, but there is no actual connection with another human being occurring.

    I can assure you that intimacy in the context of a committed "until death do us part" relationship is so far superior to what you are currently fooling around with, that the experiences are not merely differences in degree -- they are completely different in kind.

    “It would seem that Our Lord finds our desires not too strong, but too weak. We are half-hearted creatures, fooling about with drink and sex and ambition when infinite joy is offered us, like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at the sea. We are far too easily pleased.”

    ― C.S. Lewis, The Weight of Glory, and Other Addresses
     
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