NoFap

  1. Welcome to NoFap! We have disabled new forum accounts from being registered for the time being. In the meantime, you can join our weekly accountability groups.
    Dismiss Notice

I need this for my marriage

Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by Cromwell, Nov 17, 2013.

  1. Nov 17, 2013 #1
    Cromwell

    Cromwell New Fapstronaut

    2
    0
    1
    I have been married for a year and a half and I have had problems with pmo since I was 12. I am suffering from severe ED and I need to stop pmo completely so I can have a healthy sexual relationship with my wife. We want to try to get pregnant soon and I don't think I can perform to make that happen. My problem is so severe it is literally keeping me from having a family. I'm on day four right now. I think my all time record is eight days. I love that I found this website and I am super excited to finally beat this thing completely. Wish me luck.
     
    Cromwell, Nov 17, 2013
    Cromwell, Nov 17, 2013
    #1
  2. Nov 17, 2013 #2
    Blue

    Blue Fapstronaut

    405
    17
    18
    I'm glad you're here, Cromwell. Your ED will get better if you can reboot your brain. Every man here understands your struggles with porn and excessive masturbation. My advice is to educate yourself about porn addiction (www.yourbrainonporn.com is a good place to start), find an accountability partner, and start a journal to record your thoughts and experiences on your journey to becoming PMO free. Good luck, and feel free to contact me anytime.
     
    Blue, Nov 17, 2013
    Blue, Nov 17, 2013
    #2
  3. Nov 17, 2013 #3
    is this it

    is this it Fapstronaut

    150
    9
    18
    Cromwell- Welcome and best of luck to you and your wife in repairing your relationship. I understand very well what you are going through but I also want you to do this for you. I know your priorities lie with your wife and future family but if you are only doing this to get pregnant it won't last.

    You need to want this to heal, settle your mind and improve yourself. Do it for you and you will bring your wife and family along for the long run. Hang in there brother and welcome.
     
    is this it, Nov 17, 2013
    is this it, Nov 17, 2013
    #3
  4. Nov 18, 2013 #4
    Cromwell

    Cromwell New Fapstronaut

    2
    0
    1
    Thanks for your support. I actually just pmo'd. I'm so upset. My problem is that after I finish it is like it wasn't even me who did it. I just go into fap mode and my brain turns off or something. It's like I just step out of my mind and auto pilot takes over and screws me. This is the first time I have had people to be accountable to though so that should help. I'm just so frustrated because like I said I don't even remember deciding to start looking at P. It was just youtube videos but I guess it did the job. The best way to explain how I experience the loss of control is to compare it to getting drunk. When I first start I don't even feel anything happening, it's like taking one sip of beer. But then gradually, I get intoxicated without realizing it, and because I'm drunk I make worse and worse decisions, progressing towards fapping, and then next thing I know I just woke up, and have this sad memory of the mistake I just made, for the millionth time. Does anyone else relate to this?
     
    Cromwell, Nov 18, 2013
    Cromwell, Nov 18, 2013
    #4
  5. Nov 18, 2013 #5
    Lion

    Lion Fapstronaut

    176
    3
    18
    Cromwell, addictions are hard. I can definitely relate to that 'other self' taking over. The lowest form of us, and not the highest form. It is sad that our lowest form exerts such control. Like you, I am working every day on letting the highest form of myself dictate my actions.

    Next time you get the urge, imagine your wife walking in the door. Remind yourself of your motivation. Good luck!
     
    Lion, Nov 18, 2013
    Lion, Nov 18, 2013
    #5
  6. Nov 18, 2013 #6
    is this it

    is this it Fapstronaut

    150
    9
    18
    That would be called a "Fapatizer" An innocent video or picture that triggers you and starts the dopemine flowing. Once your brain starts getting its fix you are in trouble. You need to set yourself up for success and right now you are setting yourself up for failure. Until you gain more control stay off youtube. Really there is no productive reason to be on there anyway. Instead fill your time with things that are productive, make a list of things you would like to do if you could transfer your fap time into productive time and then keep busy. If you are not using the computer for work or visiting this site then shut it off. If you were a drunk should you sit in a booth at a bar? If you were a junky should you go to the movies with a heroin dealer? The computer, the TV magazines and anything that can trigger you is your enemy now. Hold that disgusted feeling of yourself in your mind and push forward.
     
    is this it, Nov 18, 2013
    is this it, Nov 18, 2013
    #6

Share This Page